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This is a discussion forum for people affected by the Herpes simplex virus (HSV) where you can talk openly and honestly. If you’ve been feeling afraid, alone, isolated or confused prepare to feel a whole lot better. You are among friends here and our support crew can help you realize just how normal and common this skin condition is.
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Sex and Kissing
A special section to discuss how herpes and cold sores affect your sex life and physical affection.
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Hsv1 genital
I am dating a great woman that told me she has Hsv1 in the genital area. She contracted it from someone in the past that was going down on her while he had Hsv1 oral. She will not allow me to contract it from her and we are so limited on what she will let me do. She has me use a condom and I am unable to perform with a condom. Here is my question: Most of my life I have gotten cold sores from the sun and stress. I got tested and did test positive for Hsv1 oral. Since we both have tested positive for Hsv1, can we enjoy “everything” together? Hers is in the genital area and she says that I can get it in the genital area from her if she gave me oral of if we had sex without a condom. I love this woman and really want to enjoy everything. -
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Dating when you both have hsv2
Thanks CHT, i appreciate the advice. I think I just need to build up the courage and meet him. Stop being scared and take a chance. Or I might just become a hermit...lol -
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Having a hard time 7 1/2 years after diagnosis
Its been 7.5 years of being Hsv2 positive. Im still very much struggling. Im still.. single. Ive had bad luck disclosing my status to people except for one person, and that one person years ago I destroyed things bc i felt worthless and like he deserved someone better even tho he was the love of my life, and I manifested him in another relationship. Ive gone to therapy, all therapists can do is say "you'll find someone who loves and accepts you for your diagnosis" yet they dont understand bc they dont have any experience w having an std and how hard it is. I am 38 and again another holiday season alone is heartbreaking. My biological clock is ticking and to make it worse, valtrex is now causing me such psychotic side effects physical and mental I am not going to be able to take it daily to supress anymore. So how the hell am I supposed to date now the antiviral was my only damn hope of potentially finding a mate and now its suddenly making me so ill and hallucinate and mood swing and muscle ache bad and horrible dreams, depression bad anxiety that makes me shake and psycho short tempered when I take it. It always gave me mood swings but all this other stuff is worse. The only meds they can give me are basically the same med. "Well theres condoms" Condoms aren't the answer. I want to have children. I cant have a kid with a rubber wedge in between us. At 38, I dont have the time now to sift through countless men and find the right one after trial and error. Im already old and missing out on the opportunity to start a family. You guys I am freaking. Im so worried about my future. Im starting to honestly lose hope for my future more and more by the day. Most of my family has passed away or moved away, my fathers health is going down the drain and if I lose my parents Im not even sure I'll want to be here anymore alone without a supportive partner in my life. I dont like being alone. I had sex years ago w someone bc I was basically a virgin and was embarrassed guys wouldnt accept me bc of my inexperience. I went and got experience and then got stds hsv2 and hpv and now im embarrassed no one will accept me w this as they have not. Im scared to bring it up or tell anyone anymore, I went on hsv dating sites, nothing good on there. I dont know anyone w this and cant find any form of support. Im just hopeless.. and feel im about to live a long life alone now and never get to have any kids or get married or anything. I feel my life is over. I got robbed big time of all of those things. -
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PLEASE help me ! Am I false Positive ?
It took me 2 months for it to show up in my blood, 1 week to show up via swab on sores. Hsv2 doesn't always cause sores for me anymore than my first primary infection did. You'll neve unfortunately figure out how you got it. Til this day it still baffles me, but I am certain its from the one whos telling me he got tested and doesnt have it bc he was my only unprotected sex partner/sex partner. But it still worries me like did it come from somewhere else? Is he being truthful? The doctors cant and wont help me figure it out either how I got it. I cant say for certain if hes lying or not. I had someone touch me with their hand 2 mos before my diagnosis and I worried about that. I wasnt with a guy for a few years prior than those circumstances, However, I did find out I caught HPV as well, and HPV does not come from someone touching your genitals w their hands after touching themself, and its very rare for someone to have throat HPV, it can happen but rare, to pass that to my genitals, which leads me to believe it was that most recent sex partner. If you got a positive swab back it definitely is not false positive. Swab tests are highly accurate. I was also on treatment for BV at the time of my diagnosis as well. Also like you, had fever, chills, swelling, even urinary retention, the whole works. I have heard that if someone had it awhile they may not show they have herpes in their system anymore like it doesn't produce enough antibodies in the blood to show up on bloodwork anymore. OR the person is lying and didn't get tested, Most doctors REFUSE to test anyone unless they are symptomatic. It sad they don't like to test for such a debilitating disease. More than likely, I'd say it came from your new sexual partner. given the timeframe and the circumstances, it reminds me a lot of what I went through. I had tons of sex w my partner at the time, like you 3-5 days before herpes attacked me. Herpes primary incubation timeline is 2 - 12 days of exposure. Hope this helps. I've had herpes for 7.5 years now. -
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PLEASE help me ! Am I false Positive ?
Hi, I was just recently “diagnosed” with hsv 2. To keep things short I need to determine 1. Am I false positive ? How can I find out ? and for 2. Is there any way to tell who i contracted from if I only had 2 partners ? Please read for more information. I for one, do not really understand my diagnosis or the lab reading and I also, for 2 do not feel like something is adding up. I just recently developed a new sexual partner and about 2 days later I felt as though my body was being weird. I road it out and then got very sick. High fever and chills. I tested negative for the flu and also covid. I then developed sores. They were not in clusters and then I got the courage to get tested again. I told them something wasn’t right and they did a swab which came back abnormal. However with the full panel everything came back negative except my swab and BV. I asked them to get tested. they said they tested for everything and it was all negative (literally the day right after they got tested). I didn’t think HSV-2 testing could come back that fast ? I also got a blood test however according to google it takes weeks/months to test positive with a blood test. My discharge is normal and there is no smell. I was treated for BV which did stop my sores and heal them. Both swab and blood test were positive but before this new sexual partner I had not had sex for 3 months. It can only be between two people. I’m lost. I have no idea what to do. I can answer all questions and include pictures of my symptoms.
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