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Found 42 results

  1. sheenas

    Confused ?

    Im hsv2 and 1. its been like 18 months since i had a painful outbreak down there. Whyy dont i have sores down there or on my lips ? Is it because i have a healthy immune system that i could only have outbreaks long periods at a time?? And with hsv1 can i still be contagious without a cold sore.. And how?
  2. Hi everyone. I'm new to these forums. I'm not sure of my status since my possible exposure in September. I have been tested five days after exposure and it came back negative. I keep getting more and more symptoms on and off. I have been every doctor from primary, gyno, dermatologist and dentist. My anxiety is out of control that I've been prescribed ssris but scared to take it since I read that someone said it caused their outbreak. I have been having nightmares about sores covering my face and thighs. I feel terrified of my own body. Being on here has helped some with getting all of this off my chest. If anyone wants to talk I'm here.
  3. imtryingmybest

    Just Diagnosed

    Wow. So, I just got the test results about an hour ago. After calling my mom and sobbing uncontrollably, I did some reading. I read a lot about other women's experiences, and also ended up on this website. Needless to say, I am incredibly upset about it. I feel disgusting. Dirty, gross, like nothing. The worst part: I don't know who gave it to me. I have had more than one sexual partner this past month, and frankly, it is going to be fucking hard to tell them. I don't know how I am going to tell these people, how they will react, if they will tell our friends. Who will I be known as? Who will I become? I'm concerned about future relationships. How to tell those future boyfriends. Will anyone ever love me? I don't want this to become who I am, but right now in the moment, it's hard. Luckily, I am getting medication and seeing a therapist next week. I think that will help. I'm shattered. I'm currently in college, and this is going to be a chip on my shoulder for a while. It almost sucks not having other people know, because they have no idea how hard this is or what I'm going through-- getting diagnosed, all the symptoms, etc. For now, I'm going to try and just take each day at a time. Morale is low, will to live is low, but we always make it to tomorrow. Always. It's never the end, and I don't want this to be the end. Anyways, here I am: needing support, and also ready to give it.
  4. Spotted Dick Mccgee

    Is this Herpes??

    The doctor couldn’t tell me for sure and I’m still waiting for the results. I had unprotected sex with a new partner about five days ago. Three days after I woke up with these red spots everywhere. If anything they’ve gotten smaller. There’s no pain/discharge and only minor itching and irritation of my foreskin. What do you think? https://imgur.com/a/sccIpuE
  5. Hello, About 3 weeks ago I began my relationship with my new sugar daddy. Unfortunately I jumped the gun and had sex with him before he could get tested. It was unprotected. I asked him shortly after to get tested and I'd do the same. My appointment is this week but lately ive been have been experiencing some pain, burning and itchiness with white/clear discharge(thin). Also, I have some signs of irritation like small white/clear bumps(see pictures) around my vulva and labia. I asked him about his sexual history and he also said he'd gone to be tested recently and he was clean. But now I'm nervous, I have a girlfriend and we have sex pretty often and I don't want to give her a yeast infection but i definitely don't want to give her herpes. Please help. Does it look like a start of an outbreak or am I just being paranoid? Thanks in advance!
  6. Count your blessings and not your problems. Realize that yesterday is gone, today is here, and tomorrow is beginning. Let it go and seize the day while you still have it. In the end, you will find your true self and love them even more. Trust me.
  7. Hello all, First of all, wow. What a wonderful community of people here on honeycomb and across the web. I experienced my first outbreak of HSV 1- genital last week and I am so grateful of all the helpful tips and tricks and stories I have read. It truly helped me get through what has been the most painful week of my life: physically and emotionally. I got married in May 2018 to the man of my dreams after 4 very happy years of growth and love together. Literally days after we returned from our honeymoon I thought I had some severe chaffing from walking around and sweating. I was so tired, my vagina was inflamed, and soon after days of ignoring the issue/assuming it would go away, I had ulcers form all over my genital area. And I mean ALL over! Peeing felt like passing razor blades, I couldn’t clean myself properly, I was afraid to eat or drink, I could barely move and most of all the pain was unbelievable. Before I went to the Gynocologist and got visual diagnosis of herpes I thought it was anything, but that. I have been in a steady relationship for 4 years and I was certain there was no way this virus would sit dormant in me for that long. However, the Doctor took a look and told me it looked a lot like herpes. Through my sobbing and shock, I could barely pull myself together. I actually spoke to an on site therapist for about an hour about my fears of my new husband finding me disgusting and viewing me as a burden he was stuck with. I was terrified to tell him. However, when I shared the news I was met with unconditional love, understanding and concern. This negative situation actually brought us closer as newly weds. He has been a great support system for me. Now, the outbreak has cleared up, but I am experiecing some nerve and “phantom pains” down there. There’s a numbing pain in my butt and left leg that is incredibly irritating. Has anyone else experienced this? On another note, I am curious to hear stories of over coming the lack of sexiness and lack of libido after finding out you have herpes? How do you get back the confidence and urge to have sex again? Thanks for your time! -K
  8. Need some advice
  9. Hi, I'm new with this disease. I was herpes 1 positive, I only had an outbreak once a year or two years (oral herpes in the corners of the mouth). I was in high school when I got it (I was 17 years old). . 6 months ago I went to a concert, I met a girl, bla bla bla and she gave me oral sex. A week later I had a horrible itching and transparent urethral discharge. The itching felt the same as when I get oral herpes. I did IGG exams at 2 weeks and only type 1 positive came out (which I already knew) herpes 2 came out negative. After 3 months I returned to take the test and the two positive ones came out. After 4 months I did all the tests: HIV, hepatitis, syphilis, gonorrhea, chlamydia. All negative. Only herpes type 2 positive. I never thought that for a blow job I could get herpes type 2. In these 6 months my only symptom is horrible itching that lasts about 3 -4 days. The first attack, it lasted 45 days. Yes, herpes 2 can live in the mouth and can spread, I had that experience. My main question, my only symptom is the itching (currently every 3-4 weeks) can I get worse? Currently I do not take antivirals (only when I get it in my mouth), and I do not take the arginine diet, I eat normal. What do you think?
  10. Hi all, im new to the site but was diagnosed about a year and a half ago. I luckily seemed to get a pretty mild case of hsv-2, because since my first outbreak i've been fine up until now. This outbreak is different though, no lesions, but the same flu symptoms i had the first time, lethargic and achy. And also lower back pain. Does that sound familiar to anyone else? Anyway, i think the worst parts for me have been worrying that ill infect my current partner who is herpes free and dealing with the whole "stigma". A few weeks ago i learned that a few of my so called "friends" who i made the mistake of confiding in when i was first diagnosed have basically blasted my business to anyone who'll listen behind my back. Which has been pretty tough. When i realized that it actually sent me into a depression which i think brought on this outbreak. Which is ironic and depressing in itself. So thats my story, lol. Ill bet a lot of you have similar ones. Nice to meet some people in the same boat.
  11. KittiesTitties

    Black Friday.

    This is the first time i've come forward with this... To anyone or anything. So, I'll start it with a simple question for all of you: If you could go back in time, what would you change and would you change it? Most who would go back would take the chance to set their lives on a more stable path before winds of life change took hold or to reclaim a past that has slipped from ones grasp. Others who wouldn't change anything have since come to peace with their path and have come to the conclusion that things are the way they should be. It's very 'black and white', close the book question, right? If you have Herpes, it's not that easy of a question. That's where i'll start. I have Herpes. That is the first time I've seen this typed. This is my first time reading this to myself. However this isn't my first time trying to get it through my own head. Before this, I was in my bathroom, in the middle of yet another sleepless night. My eyes bloodshot with the stress and shame of the obvious self conclusion I had just reached. My cheeks swollen from a mixture of sadness and good weed I've been smoking to deal with my newly acquired burden. No amount of adulterant can make it any better. That hasn't slowed me down from thinking that however. I'm going down lists of research in my head of what the signs are and I'm starting to think I have all of them. I have some, I might as well have them all? I just stare at the reflection on the other side and ask, "Why?!" I feel my paranoid tongue inspecting my lips for nuisances. I know it's stupid to sit there and check and check again but I can't be too sure. I hear my room mates muffled voices on the other side of the door. They have no idea the hell that is occurring behind the turn of that door knob. Nor will they. Nor will anybody! I went to the doctor and he knows. That's already too many people in the know. I realize once I open the door, my old life with inevitably be present. After all, I have not changed. I still look the same (That is if nothing shows up on my lip). With a deep breath and a blocking of my feelings, I still act the same. Right? No one has any idea unless I say something? To me, that is the scariest part of the disease. It seems so easy to block it out and deal but really, its not. It devours you from the inside out. Even if you wanted to say something, there will be no more blocking it inside because when it spills out into the open, it's out there. Than who knows what one will do with the info. Either way, life is different. Life as you know it is ruined. Life as you precieve it will never be the same. That's it. Who do I tell? Should I tell? Will I ever be with someone? Can I ever tell them? Will it always hurt? Is that what nerve damage feels like? Is that an outbreak? Oh shit, did I remember to wash my hands?? Did I just touch my mouth while I was eating? Should I even talk to this girl? Is what I'm doing right? Maybe if I just use a condom, I won't ruin her life and she'll be okay?? Will I ever know peace of mind again?? Will there EVER be a CURE?! Will there EVER be a CURE?! WILL THERE EVER BE A FUCKING CURE?!?! That is my inner dialogue at pretty much every second of everyday since i was diagnosed. Sad, I know, but not uncommon I bet. You see, this shit show for me began on Black Friday 2016. I decided to go out with a friend and have a good time. Once my good time was up, I realized I locked my keys in my car. Rather than get a cab and go back the next day to get my car, I decided to stay, get totally hammered and try and find a girl to drive me home. When that failed and 3am crept up on me, I decided to hit up a girl I knew I should have stayed away from. We had tried out dating but she was fond of multiple men vying for her "love". Seeing it as a sure thing, I asked her for a 'ride' home. I remember vividly thinking while texting her "Dude, you know this chick is gross, right? But hey, it's been a while. If I catch something, It's only like $127 bucks for the clap treatment." $127. One Hundred and Twenty-Seven dollars. Now, do you remember my question from earlier? This is where it's relevance is felt. THIS MOMENT is when I wish I could go back. This singular thought changed the tredjectory of the rest of my life. If only I had a second chance to make the better judgement call. Well as you could imagine, things went accordingly. Once we got to my house, it was on. The odd thing that sticks out to me in hindsight, is how okay she felt letting me inside her knowing full well she had something that could ruin everything in my life. She enjoyed it if I remember right. I finished and suddenly she had to leave. As i look back, I can see now that this is probably when the shame and regret got to her. She never really hit me up after that. I woke up with a gnarly hangover and got a ride to my car the next day. Over the next few weeks, nothing really happened. I held out the idea in my head of going to the clinic, just in case but it wasnt priority. Never in my weirdest dreams did i think i would even come in contact with the dreaded H word. Ironically, I was at the culprits house when the first sign hit. And boy, did it hit. In my fucked up state, I thought about having another go with her. The last time, 3 weeks ago didn't seem so bad and she did dig it, why not? She spent the whole night playing hard to get. Than it turned into playing hard to even get to. Something was up. But before I could start trying to figure her out, something weird started to happen with me. It felt like the worst case of blue balls I've ever had. It was to the point where my tummy hurt. I excused myself to the bathroom and started to feel around. No swelling or obvious obstructions. I thought it was all in my head. That is when I lifted the skin flap on the top of my penis. There it was. At first, I thought "Thats a weird place for acne?" My optimism slowly faded when I realized this thing is getting bigger. It's starting to duplicate. It went from a pimple to spots than to open sores. I told her I had to go and hauled ass home to investigate further. The next week, I went to the doctor. He swabbed it and took a blood sample. The viral swab came back inconclusive which made me happy, but it was the blood test that was the real tell. The doctor kind of more or less danced around the matter till he finally laid it upon me and my waivering hope of a normal life. "You have tested positive for HSV-1 antibodies." You have antibodies, you have the disease, apparently. That pill was the most bitter one I've ever had to force down, although the disgusting acyclovair tablets they give me is a very close second. I came home in a fog. I was numb for the better part of a week. That wasn't the hard part though. God no. It was carrying on with my life that hurt the most. Yeah, I have open, pussing leisons on my penis and one single touch can infect anyone near me. But it's not like I could tell anyone. Nerve damage began to take hold, causing constant discomfort. No one knows. No one will, I hope. I have to constantly wash my hands and underwear. Not a word about it. Just the idea of talking to any woman, anywhere, has me terrified that I'll ruin her life and I'm gonna be alone with this forever. Still, Not. One. Single. Word. That was it. I'm all alone. Just me and my Herpes. I had it all planned out, even down to the minute. I was gonna wake up early. Have a nice breakfast with a cup of tea as the sun comes up. Have a nice morning drive with my windows down and music blarring my insecurities away, for just a bit. Lunch and a beer with a dear friend. Than go for a drive and hike up the mountain by myself. Once to the top, thats where the plan would unflold. I left the note in my unlocked car, tied the rope with one end tied to a tree. I slip my cowardess head in the loop and take one last breath, than one last look. Than one last step. That was it. As you can see, that plan didn't quite pan out. That's not to say it wont in the future but right than, I felt like I have some unfinished business. I cant go out knowing and thinking of what can still be. Why fall for the stigmas of this actually common virus when really, there may be a cure in the near future? Better yet, what can I do to help others in my shoes? How about others with their shoes in deeper waters than mine? Lots of questions, i know, but this has been my mind frame, not since diagnosis but rather since I wrapped my head around the fact that this is my life now. This is my disease. This is my burden. Sounds daunting and a bit sad, and it is, but the thing that sticks out is that it's still MY LIFE. It's not the herpes life. It can call it's shots all it wants but it's still MY body. My penis has since withered and become a shadow of its former self, but it's still MINE. The way I'm beginning to see it, is that this virus is just a shitty room mate that doesn't pay rent, coming and going as it pleases but with a little patience and hope, someday it will leave. I will have a normal life again. I will have a normal life again. I WILL have a NORMAL life again. I know my story sounds like a lot of others but It feels amazing to get this off my chest. To just type "I HAVE HERPES" has a bit of comfort with it. I don't like it but i can't deny it. I'm hoping you all enjoyed reading and I hope to be back on here soon to talk more with you. It's good to know there are others out there for me, even if it feels like my body is against itself. In conclusion, I would say if I could go back in time and change something, I would talk myself out of sending that girl that text asking for a ride home. I would keep my pants on and save it for someone who truly deserves to be in my life. But let's face it, that entire question I asked you in the beginning? It's bullshit... We cannot go back in time. You cannot stop change. Thank you all. Stay strong. We will have a cure! P.S. The feelings of suicide are always prevalent. It's easy to say I got through it the first time. However, they don't go anywhere so I ask you, please, Help me. I'am my own worst enemy. I don;t want to end my own life. I don't want to leave my family and friends like that but I still don't know what to do. I still need help...
  12. Unluckiestguyonearth

    Anyone from the PH?

    Im depressed af. Anybody from Philippines?
  13. cracked

    Is it just me?

    So is it just me or does anyone else notice we have an increasing number of people signing up each day on HC alone? Does this maybe suggest the rate of infections is increasing? Sucks to see more people being victims of this virus.
  14. I've known for 4 days. My doctor called today and made it official, Hsv2. Still feels a little unreal. I'm trying to be positive. I've read about how common this is. Feeling pretty lonely though.
  15. Ok so here's my story. Met this man back in March of this year. I didn't know how I felt about him so I was kind of all over the place with my emotions and kind of blew him off. He never gave up and continued to pursue (called, texted even if I didn't answer) me. June is when I realized he seemed like a good guy and it was me with the issues (past relationships were not very good, etc). Anyway, we started being intimate in June and that kind of started the relationship. He had always said that there was something about me and that is why he never gave up even though his friends were telling him to move on. The relationship was great! We hung out regularly and the sex was off the charts. I am a stickler about condoms to the point that I have some at home just in case he runs out of his own. The 2nd time we were intimate using his condoms the dam thing slid completely off and I had no idea b/c I was in la la land. He realized moments later and we simply got up, tried to dig it out, put another one on and kept it moving. There was another time when he got frisky and slid it in and pumped a few times before I tapped him on his back, pointed to the night stand and said "condoms". I was really only concerned about babies not diseases and he had no problem putting one on. Things are progressing nicely...he even met my kids. He started telling me and his friends that he thought I was "the one" and at 42 I was very happy b/c he seemed legit and very respectful. Well September (last month) I was going for my regular physical. I went in for the lab work late on Sept 28 and requested STD testing to sort of get that out of the way since me and my new boo were talking future here. On 9/30 we attend my friend's wedding and we look like we had stepped out of a magazine! We looked so good that I put our pic on my FB profile which I had never done in the past. So many compliments from friends and family and he even sent our pics to all of his friends and family. After the wedding we go have dinner and have an amazing talk about our future, merging lives, etc. I was really happy ya'll!! I even stayed at his place overnight for the first time and he even got up and made me breakfast the next morning. We did not have traditional sex b/c I was on my period but I took care of him in other ways. Oct 3 is my actual physical with my doctor. She tells me that I am in pretty good health (LDL/HDL, etc looks great) but she didn't mention my STD testing so I asked about it. She checked her computer and said that the lab neglected to test for STDs and asked if I still wanted it done and I said "sure" thinking all should be good. She then says that she will do a full STD panel which I didn't know hadn't been done in the past and just sort of nodded and went over for more blood work. Oct 4 I am at home preparing dinner and had big plans to go see boo on Oct 5 where we planned to wear each other out b/c we hadn't been able to days before. Well the doctor's office calls and the nurse proceeds to tell me that I do not have HIV/AIDS and the other 2 major diseases. At that time I had sort of started to half listen as I stirred my shrimp and tended to my rice. She then said "you also tested positive for the antibodies associated with Herpes" and time STOPPED!! I asked her to repeat herself and she said it again and asked if I had had any outbreaks and I am like "NO". She said that I had HSV 2 and if I have an outbreak to make an appt to swab the spot. She then referred me to the CDC site and wanted to end the call like she was simply telling me my pizza was ready to be picked up. I kept her on the call and had several other questions that she kindly answered and also shared a personal story about her sister that has the antibodies and never had an outbreak and how it had been years, etc. So in my mind I am thinking I need to see the doc again but she said not until I have an outbreak....ummm why wait is what I am thinking. So I end the call and immediately think of my new boo. We have been intimate for the last 3 months and this man has been waiting on me to come around. I also thought of 2 other guy friends that had told me a few years back that they had it. One guy told me the chick he was seeing casually for a year knew she had it and never said a word and I thought that was soooo wrong!! Anyway, I let about 30 mins pass and I text boo to see what time he got off so he calls and says he is already off and almost home (30 mins from me). I ask him if he could come by and he said traffic was too nasty, etc. then asked what was wrong. So I tell him the doctor called and first tell him I don't have HIV/AIDS and the other 2 major ones BUT I tested positive for the antibodies and he was confused and asked questions. I get so choked up that I ended up crying and could not speak and just hung up the phone! That was on Oct 4....this man did not reach out to me until 10/9...10/9!! I reached out on Oct 5 and told him I was able to get in to to see the doc on 10/9 and he responded very nonchalantly but that was it...nothing until the morning of 10/9 where he sends me a dam email pretty much ending it all. The email simply says that he is sorry this has happened to me and that he wishes me and my family well then adds that I really meant a lot to him b/c he had not been able to eat or sleep all weekend, etc and how wonderful out future would have been had this not come up....WTF??. So I respond and light into his ass about not reaching out to me before then and how I felt he offered me no dam support. The nurse said that b/c I haven't had any outbreaks I could have had it for years or as early as his butt...no one knows. My HSV 2 number is 5 which my doctor said means nothing as the numbers increase and decrease depending on outbreaks. Funny thing is...that weekend I spent satisfying him in other ways...my face was tingly as hell for days after that but I just thought I wore those muscles out! LOL, funny now but not really. Anyway, the boo finally calls on the afternoon of 10/9 as I head to the doctor. He tone is NASTY...I mean NASTY!! Like I knew I had this crap and didn't tell him or something. He proceeds to tell me that he got tests last year and I tried explaining to him that regular STD test don't include Herpes but he was adamant that his did. He fully believes there is no way this could have come from him and I keep telling him we won't know until he gets tested. I told him that I would have NEVER responded to him the way he did to me!! I would have been more supportive and we would have went to the doc together and did our research, etc. We actually get into a full blown fuss match and the call did not end very well By the time I get to the doc my pulse is high and I had to calm my nerves. I talk to the doc which really didn't do much but tell me stories of couples she had to counsel where this just kind of came out of nowhere. One couple got married 6 months ago and she came in last week b/c of a bump on her butt and it was HSV2..she and and boo had been together for years. The doc again says the same thing...go and practice safe sex and only return if I have an outbreak. I even asked about the meds as I had dam near read every article on the net after I got the call and boo blew me off for dam days (still pisses me off) but she didn't think it was a good idea to start taking them if I don't have any symptoms. So after I leave the doc I am not in the best moods. I sent boo an email about my doc visit as she had offered to talk to the both of us at any time. Later on I started thinking about how he had treated me and I sent a long email pretty much expressing my disappointment with him and how I suddenly went from his potential wife to just a friend in a matter of days. He never tried to see what his options were and immediately pretty much walked the F away leaving me here to deal with this ish by myself. How can he act like this when I was potentially the one?? I sent the email on 10/9 and I have not heard from him and right now I am just like "whatever"....I am so over it!! Am I overreacting?? I mean, if it was him telling me this news I would not have turned my back on him after we had already been intimate and were talking big future plans....I just would not have given up so easy!! We are both in our early 40s and it's soooo hard to find someone that gets you these days. I thought I had that in him but now I am alone and constantly in the bathroom with a magnifying mirror looking at my precious vagina seeing if something shows up!! Ugh..FML!! I don't even know if he plans to get tested or what since he is so certain he is clean as a whistle. I remember that the last couple of months he had been complaining about being tired all the time and how his body is achy to the point that he can't sleep in his bed but has to sleep on the couch. He recently said he had been getting headaches too so who knows....I'm at a loss!! Anyway, Hi ya'll....my ass is here!!
  16. LiamG

    Help! Is this reliable?

    Hello, I had a possible exposure 7 weeks ago by mutual masturbation, I took this test to check for hsv2. Is there enough time for the antibodies to form? I've read that the test is 70% reliable after 6 weeks, is this true? Is this test a good sign? Thank you in advance!
  17. Quest.wr

    New

    I literally just registered for this forum , I'm glad to be here. Hi my name is quest I'm 21 and was diagnosed 10/20/17 with herpes 2. Its been a real struggle I thought it was a yeast infection then bacterial vaginosis until sores appeared. Apparently my boyfriend has herpes 1 and thinks it's just a cold sore (I keep telling him go get tested I haven't told him I've been diagnosed for fear of negative and disrespectful reaction also I feel he's going to blame me) well he gave me head in what must have been the middle more towards ending of outbreak but I didn't see it until the deed was done. Stupid me. People say I should be angry at him I should be angry in general but I'm not I'm not sad either. Its as much my fault as it is his I should have been paying attention. Idk kinda rambling now so I'm going to end but not before saying if anyone is looking for some relief treatments besides the actual medicine that you can do often is wash and dry very well (even tho it hurts like hell) then spray with a mix of tea tree oil and a carrier oil I use olive. Its such a breath of fresh air. please comment if you have some relief treatments of your own.
  18. Hi, I am pretty sure I have hsv2. Have had hsv1 for years. I need advice. I don't know what to do. I Have never been so afraid in all my life. I was with a guy 3 weeks ago and we didn't have sex but, we did grind and no condom. Within a day I felt very uncomfortablein my area. Within 2 weeks nearly to the day pain, rash,pimple like red spots no eruption. Tail bone pain, eye pain,burning etc. He says he didn't give it to me ok. No sex with anyone in 6 mos. I went to Dr she's saying no it's not hsv2. I know it is. I just got back in contact with my ex and he is the love of my life. Literally. I don't know how to tell him. We are both so sexual and I fear he won't come back. I wanted to end my life being without him. People who are spiritual know what I mean when ones I say he is my twin flame. Help I need advice.
  19. comekissmyclass

    Need someone to talk to.

    I really need someone new to talk to about these things. I have no one because none of my close friends or family members know what this is like. I'm only 21 and found out I have HSV2 in March and have been going through a very back breakup. If anyone's interested in having a conversation, I'm here.
  20. Bar_Wench

    Hsv1 and Hsv2

    Welp, here I am...a herpes support online forum. I got the call today that I tested positive for HSV1 and HSV2. The nurse did not say if they were oral or genital specific. My doctor prescribed me the generic for valtrax or however you spell it and I took my first pill tonight. Rewind to almost a year and a half ago when I went to the doctor while I had an outbreak in my nose! They did a complete blood work up on me and she said I came up positive for both simplex 1 and 2. I was DEVASTATED like threw up from crying so hard and went home from work lol. The doctor knew how hysterical I was and scheduled a follow up re test just to be sure. Of course the re test came back negative for HSV2. I was overjoyed and my doctor said sometimes false positives happen because of a cross over or whatever. So fast forward to today when I get my blood test results from the same doctor...imagine my face. A mix between about to vomit and about to start swinging on someone. WHY DO THESE TESTS READ DIFFERENT!!! Ughhhhhh. Now I've exposed my boyfriend to this awful virus and I have no idea if he has it nor does he. I've always known I've had HSV1 because I got cold sores for as long as I could remember. After doing so much research these past few hours I'm just now aware that both HSV strains can cause genital AND oral symptoms. My outbreaks have only ever taken place on my face! Never on my genitals to my knowledge! Unless they were so mild? I've never seen or felt blisters on my genitals. Are genital outbreaks different from oral ones? Is it possible I only have oral HSV1 and 2? I'm so confused. I don't know how to feel and I wish I could just get consistent answers. I'm going to say 2/3 positives for HSV2 deff means I have it... I guess I'm still in the mind set that one herpes is good and the other is bad for lack of better terms.
  21. Hi, I was just recently diagnosed with HSV-1 genital area. The shock and anger are still new for me. It's comforting to have found this forum. My husband is reeling and is absolutely no help right now. A lot of my anger is directed towards him, but I am trying to stay away from the blame game. Anyway, hello.
  22. Hi everyone! Im new to online forums in general. I was diagnosed almost 3 years ago, my freshman year of college, after being sexually assaulted by someone I considered and friend. Previously before that, I had been saving myself for marriage. It took me a long time to accept what had happen to me. I was in so much denial that I had been raped that I even went back to that guy to tell him that he had given me herpes 2 and to tell him that it was okay. I am very open with the fact that I have herpes because i want to help the stigma around it even if I am just educating the people around me. i wanted to join bc obviously i still have some days where I feel worthless and hopeless and bc I want to help every person I can deal with this better than I did.
  23. Michele1920

    New to It All

    I tested positive for HSV II about a month ago and have been experiencing highs and lows since. While I try to stay positive about it for the most part, I am reminded constantly of the relationship that was divided because of my diagnosis. I decided to sign up for an online forum today after I had my first disclosure (with a new partner) and it didn't go well. I couldn't decide what the intentions were of a boy I have been texting for about two weeks now when he asked me to stay the night last night. Was he just looking for a one night stand? He told me he wanted a physical relationship but not an ACTUAL dating relationship. I didn't know if I should tell someone something so intimate when I wasn't sure how long he'd stick around. When I got to his apartment the time never seemed right for me to say anything. Would he send me away if he knew? When it was obvious we were going to have sex I asked if he had a condom and he did and we used it. I left this morning feeling so guilty for not saying anything. I then made the mistake of disclosing over text, so I could feel some relief for not telling him before. Even though I explained how I was on medication and he didn't have anything to worry about, he was obviously still very angry. I totally understand why he was; if someone told me in this way I would be too. But this anger is so disheartening. I'm 0 for 2 when it comes to telling someone I really like that I have genital herpes. I guess this is just a long-winded way of asking how and when to disclose. I don't want every disclosure to be like this - where I feel like a terrible person for having such a common disease. Some much needed love and responses would be great. Thanks for reading.
  24. Hello to anyone reading this I am currently in my first ever outbreak, and was diagnosed on Saturday, although my symptoms started on Tuesday 11th and I was pretty sure it was herpes before going to the clinic. When the nurse looked at me she winced, so it know it is a bad outbreak, and when she took a culture from the tissue I screamed in absolute agony, I have never felt anything like this pain. I am suffering from pretty much every symptom.. flu, muscle aches, fatigue, pain from the blisters, burning sensations, tingling etc... I was given medication when I went, and the nurse asked me to go back tomorrow so she can see if its helping and how I'm doing, or if I need a higher dosage... I am just so overwhelmed and feel generally shit. I can't tell me family whats wrong but obviously they can see tell something is up as I've been bed ridden and visibly down for a week and been taking baths 2-3 times a day. I recently started seeing/sleeping with a new guy so feel that its possible that he gave it to me, as I haven't had sex for nine months before this, When I told him he was really nice and support and said nothing has changed so that has helped. But i still feel really disgusting just because its so painful and therefore can't stop thinking about it, and it looks horrible. My vagina which i once thought was a nice vagina as they go, a,d have been told its nice, is now a mess, and I feel like its never going to be the same. I just want this outbreak to end and feel like it never will so I can get on with my life. Im extremely worried that I am going to have painful recurrent outbreaks to the point where I can't do things I usually do. I AM scared of having to tell future partners as I'm afraid they will just think of that everytime it gets sexual. I feel like thats all I am going to think about whenever I get intimate. I am also scared the skin won't heal and will be sensitive forever so when I do have sex it will hurt. Basically I am a mess and don't know what to think or how to feel or what to do. I just want it to go away So I decided to join this site and see if anyone feels the same or has felt the same, gain any advice or wisdom and hear about other peoples experiences. If you have read this thanks for listening to me feel completely sorry for myself but I don't know how else to explain how I am feeling
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