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i think my ex boyfriend gave me herpes but he wont admit it. he was cheating so he might not know that he has herpes but he said he used condoms. he might be lying. Anyways, for about three weeks now i have had ongoing symptoms starting with leg pain and pain in my but and thighs. the pain in my but and thighs lasted about a week. it was like a shooting pain. my lymph nodes in groin have been swollen for about three weeks and the side of one of my leg has a tighting pain. i just noticed today some small bumps around the opening of my vagina. they are red and feel hard. i went to planned parenthood two and a half weeks ago and she said it did not sound like herpes but i did not have the bumps when i went. they just appeared today. they haven't blistered or anything and i have not had a fever or any other flu symptoms. does it sound like i have herpes. i don't want to go back to planned parenthood and look like a nuerotic lunatic. am i just paranoid or does it sound like a possible herpes case.

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Hi, Samantha

How are you feeling today?

I wish I'd seen this sooner - it's important for you to get the bumps looked at as soon as possible if you want to know for sure. They can do a swab test and actually see if there's virus present now. If you don't get a swab test you can go back and get a blood test, but that won't be conclusive for 8-12 weeks. It takes that long for the antibodies to show up.

Don't worry about what they think of you at the clinic - this is your health! And if you have symptoms you think might be HSV you kind of are obligated ethically in my opinion to find out. By your description I can't say I have an opinion whether it is or isn't, but I can tell you that even if your bf used a condom he still may have contracted it (condoms don't cover everything) and he should be tested too. So many men spread it that way - they get it, don't have symptoms, pass it to the next girl who suffers.

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    • EssenceL25
      I’m going to force him to get tested ! Thanks for your help ! 
    • WilsoInAus
      @EssenceL25 there really isn't a question mark around the source, it's your latest partner. The median time from infection to an outbreak of lesions upon initial infection is 4 days.  The only thing that isn't certain is the type I suggest.
    • EssenceL25
      I asked if it was hsv 1 or 2 and the doctor said it was Hsv2. I’m not sure i just asked him when he was tested last he said this year I said I think we should go test together and he agreed . I’m going to bring it up again cause I really need to know if he gave this to me I wasn’t sure since it was so close to my previous relationship.
    • WilsoInAus
      @EssenceL25 then it is all beyond reasonable doubt that the current partner is the source. A 'perfect' fit in terms of timing, symptoms and swab. It may be though that the type is not technically known. Culture swabs are very often not typed and just assumed to be HSV-2 if taken from a genital location. If you received oral sex in the days leading into 7 March then it is 50/50 as to whether this is HSV-1 or HSV-2. You could contact your doctor and confirm if the swab was actually typed (which is a second test where fluorescent antibodies for HSV-1 and HSV-2 are added and see which one 'glows').  If that test wasn't done then you do not know type. If you have oral HSV-1 yourself (cold sores) then this will be HSV-2. Does your partner have oral HSV-1? It is somewhat strange for him not to rush and test - many people have a 'reaction' if they truly do not know their status and have concerns that you infected them etc. (not initially rational of course). This indicates he may know his status - or maybe he just isn't simply the sharpest tool in the shed!?
    • EssenceL25
      I had flu like symptoms and ulcers on my vagina . They did a culture and I tested positive for hsv2. I asked my partner to get tested he agreed but I’m not sure if he will cause he hasn’t said anything else about it. 
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