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Kya

Think Im jealoous

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Kya

Hey,

Is it bad that Im jealous that my 17year old sibling is getting more in the realms of relationship and sex than 1) I am now and 2) I did at that age!

They are having some fun with a friend as it were, after coming out of their first real relationship. I never just had 'fun', I always hoped, with all of them, that it would be more- just they didnt. my sibling has talked to the other person and they both agree that this is just some fun and it cant become a relationship due to factors.

They know to be careful (doesnt mean they are mind) and its just... I cant do that! Partly becasue I dont believe in one nighters or random flings, I have to like the person to let them in enough to even kiss me for one thing.

Probably sounds bad, I know.

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Kya

posted before I had finished....

Now, I cant even just have fun even if I did decide to (never did becasue it wasnt in my morals to do so) becasue I would have to inform them of what they were letting themselves in for with me. I'm in no way a 'safe bet' or wotever.

Before, I didnt have much of a problem going back to one or two of my ex's. Cant even do that anymore! :-(

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catiesmom

You could always find a + guy to fool around with? Just a suggestion. I've done the one night stand thing, and frankly i'm just not that hard up. I've had one guy who thought we were gonna be casual "friends" although i had HSV, but i'm not a casual person either, so that didn't happen!

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Kya

I always risk getting attached then I get hurt. Its just a little down putting that my younger sibling is having a more active sex life (and has even had a relationship, which I have NEVER had)

Meh...

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gotitsowhat
Hey,

......they both agree that this is just some fun and it cant become a relationship due to factors...

What people say they agree to under these circumstances and what they really mean or what actually happens or how it turns out are ALL entirely different things! And you should know by now that everybody, particularly everybody who is young, likes to say they are having a terrific, perfect, cool love life. In other words, we all tend to tell of our triumphs in this area rather than our confusion, rejections or humiliations. I have never yet heard of a young person's love life when people "agreed" on certain behaviors or attitudes where it actually turned out as expected or agreed. I hope she is having some fun and I think she probably is but I'll bet there are some things going on that are not fun that she is not as eager to talk about.

Also, no matter how cool someone professes to be, we all want to find love, someone we can depend on and trust, someone who will be there for us during the lonely nights and days. And I say this as someone who often indulged in casual sex and had a problem with long term commitments. We all want love. It's just that some of us will say so while the rest of us are too scared and vulnerable to admit it.

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Kya

Its actually a male sibling. He does like the girl and she likes him, but timing sucks and they cant be togther. He tends to talk to me about most things, think its becasue im closer in age to him.

He was a bit pissed that I didnt confide in him and tell him about my situation but I was (and still am) having trouble coming to terms with it.

I know in the end on of them will get hurt, even if they dont admit to it. But I guess its something that they will have to learn by doing. We can only protect them so much and give them adivce. They are the only ones who can choose what they want to do.

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