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Needsupport14

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Needsupport14

My poor baby is only 14 and she's being forced into a very adult situation. She was diagnosed this past Saturday. Since then both her father and I have talked to her and tried to offer encouraging words. I'm really worried about her though. Since coming back from the doctor she's been really depressed and sleeping a whole lot. Yesterday she was a lot better than Saturday, but I'm really concerned for her.

Instead of being concerned about getting ready for her freshman year of high school. She's having to worry about what our family's going to think of her when we go home for the holidays.

As if dating isn't bad enough she's gotta deal with this.

The even sadder part to the story is. The sorry bastard who was her first not only took her virginity with no regards to her feelings he also has left her with a STD that she will have for the rest of her life.

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Shayna

Hi Needsupport14,

I'm so sorry for your daughter, and the stress you as her parents have worrying about her health and future. My question for you is, why would the entire family have to know about this when she sees everyone for the holidays? It's a very private matter and once everyone knows, you can't un-ring that bell.

She will learn how to manage her hsv and she has every opportunity for a full and happy life. But hsv is a lifelong virus, which makes me feel that people should only know her status on a need-to-know basis. She's young now but as she gets older, She should be the one to decide who has knowledge of something so personal to her.

As for the guy, I'd have a talk with him, and or my lawyer, if she were my child.

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Needsupport14

We have no intentions of telling anyone. The last thing I want to be is judge. It's no one else's business. We come from a very large family and since we're rather young ourselves the last thing we want to deal with is what were they doing that she ended up getting a disease not realizing that she actually contracted the virus while visiting family back home. Right now there are more questions than answers. I'm really glad that I came across the sight because it has helped to answer a lot of questions at the same time, because this isn't something I want to talk to my friends about I'm having an opportunity to speak with people who knows what we're going through so to speak.

As for the legal aspect of the matter. I'm more so concern that this young man gets some help and treatment for his disease and learns to do the responisble thing. More so than anything I want children to become aware of their actions and the potential life changing things that can come from wreckless behavior such as unprotected sex.

Thanks again for the support and advice.

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gotitsowhat

I sent a PM to you about this

We have no intentions of telling anyone. The last thing I want to be is judge. It's no one else's business. We come from a very large family and since we're rather young ourselves the last thing we want to deal with is what were they doing that she ended up getting a disease not realizing that she actually contracted the virus while visiting family back home. Right now there are more questions than answers. I'm really glad that I came across the sight because it has helped to answer a lot of questions at the same time, because this isn't something I want to talk to my friends about I'm having an opportunity to speak with people who knows what we're going through so to speak.

As for the legal aspect of the matter. I'm more so concern that this young man gets some help and treatment for his disease and learns to do the responisble thing. More so than anything I want children to become aware of their actions and the potential life changing things that can come from wreckless behavior such as unprotected sex.

Thanks again for the support and advice.

In one post, you said your daughter would feel bad because the whole family would know when she went home for the holidays. In the above post, you say you have no intentions of telling anyone, that it's no one's business--I don't quite get it since the two posts seem to contradict one another. How would the family know unless you told them or she told them? If she got herpes while she was visiting them, they might know something about what happened, but since the diagnosis took place after she got back to you, why would they have to know anything about it? If they know she had sex, and know she doesn't feel well, you could always say that she suffered from a skin irritation but she's seen the doctor and everything's OK now. At her age, self-image is so fragile and I would think that the humiliation of a lot of people knowing about her sex life could be bad for her. I hope you can keep the lid on this.

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