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Poise, prayer and going on


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When the doctor told me I had herpes, she was very kind and said right off not to let resentment come in. She said that many, many men don't know they have herpes because they don't have symptoms or that the symptoms are so slight that they don't know what they are.

She said, this will train you to be a very calm, poised person. Just take good care of yourself, rise up, and go on. She said to take time to be quiet, eat right, get lots of rest, and to practice living gracefully.

For many years, I had almost no outbreaks. I could tell that the few I had came from extreme stress. I was also not involved with anyone.

I think about how kind and gracious she was, and how she set the tone about how to approach this.

I now am now involved with someone who is very kind about the ailment, tho' I know it isn't always easy for him. He's very thankful about my honesty and that I take care to keep him as safe as possible. It takes being more courageous and talkative about very private things than is my nature.

I have been having quite a few outbreaks. I can tell that they are related to feeling anxious, as well as diet.

I am learning to pray and let go in a way that lessens the pain.

Being able to come to the forum helps. Having the "dreaded H" can feel lonely and awful sometimes, especially during outbreaks.

Mental poise and care are very key for me, not to let myself slide into self-pity is crucial. Letting go and turning my attention, especially emotionally to thoughts and activities which I know are uplifting for me help build that poise which lessens the severity of the outbreaks and helps keep them at bay.

Hope you all are having victories.

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:applauds: Great post! Thanks for sharing with us. I hadn't thought of it that way before. I sure appreciate your outlook on this, and it definately gave me something to think about. :)

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Thank you for the kind words. Since the outbreaks have flared up again, I've been thankful for all the life-lessons learned. I don't remember the exact words of the doctor, just her kind presence. I would always rethink what she'd say to me, in English. Even tho' she was careful to simplify her German for me, I was always more or less anxious when I'd go to see her. Her calm way, her practical advice, seemed to me of the doctors of yesteryear. I've never met another like her.

Someone once told me that when life is full of hard challenges, esp. long-term ones, that it's important to do something nice for yourself, each day. To me that means something, however small, to make life nicer and finer. Sometimes that means doing something for someone else, and sometimes it means just watching the hummingbirds or the fireflies. Or being indulgent and lying down for a short rest in the daytime.

I want to be one of those people whose presence makes it easier for others to rise up and be their best. My life is nicer when I take the highest road I can. And it's nice to have help, and a little company along the way.

Am thankful this forum is here. Wishing you all a day of victories.

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