mixed feelings

[coping]

I'm a 24 yr old female... i was just diagnosed with HSV2 about a week ago. For a few days all i could do was cry and scream. I thought that this kind of thing doesn't happen to a girl like me... I slowly got out of control and then it came to this. The first night, i went to bed hoping that I would wake up and realize it was all a bad dream. I woke in the middle of the night screaming I was so mad and upset. Then after researching about it a lot, letting myself calm down, and talking to one friend who I trust... I thought about it and realized that maybe this was the higher power letting me know that I need to slow down and stop jumping into bed with every guy I thought was hot, take care of myself and pay attention to things that really matter. Thinking about this has helped me a lot... being "forced" to get to know a guy really really well, to the point that I can trust him enough to tell him my secret. Sometimes it still hurts of course... and it is always on my mind (it has only been a week). I think it will still take me a long time to actually want to date or get close to someone again. But I guess it's good that I can focus on me now... focus on my family and friends... and also find out who my true friends really are... if I can't tell them about my secret, are they really a good friend? and if i can tell one friend, they accept it, i realize that that person is a true person with a big heart. It's like Herpes is a way to see who the jerks are out there!!

I would love to talk to anyone about this... I am new and I know no one else who has the same secret as me.

[Lasmom]

Coping,

You would be surprised at how many ppl you know have the same secret. It sounds like you are off to a great start though!

[dncrck]

Coping

Hi Coping,

I'm also a 24 year old female. I've had HSV 1 orally for 20 years although I'm just now (the past week and a half) coming to terms with it, acccepting it as an irreversable part of myself, and realizing that I have to take care of my body in a whole new way. I was in heavy denial most of my life that I had this, and never went to the doctor for it because I contracted HSV by being orally raped. My cousin has HSV also, we both got it from her dad. Neither of us wanted to accept how we got it or that the abuse even happened until we were in our late teens; it wasn't until 1 week and a half ago that I was plotzing around and looked myself in the mirror, face full of sores, and said: "I have herpes. I got them from J. I need to do something about this." Like you I was devastated for a few days, crying, didn't know how I was going to pull through. Then I found this site, and the people here have really helped. Also my OB/GYN and internist who have talked to me about not waiting 21 years to come in for these things, and about facing reality better in the future, has helped. I even found out that my therapist has herepes! So, as Lasmom said, a lot more people than you would expect are infected.

I'm available anytime you want to chat. My email is Chrisishere443@aol.com.

Love ya,

Chris(tina)

[kingsfan]

there are a wealth of people around here who are more than willing to help you thru things like this... and while being a guy i cant really identify with issues that are of a female nature, i can certainly apply some logic & try to give good advice.

if you dont feel you are wanting to date anyone because of this at the current time, there is not anything wrong with that... and your ideas about focusing on yourself and your family are always good ideas regardless of what prompted you to go down that path.