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SunnySideUp

New and hoping for the right info

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SunnySideUp

I was diagnosed with genital herpes about 20 years ago. I have never taken any medication for my problem.

My outbreaks are few and far between now.

At one point, a few years ago, I had a boyfriend for about 18 months. I told him at the very beginning of our relationship that I had genital herpes and he was very understanding. He was not concerned at all, as a matter of fact. For the duration of our relationship, he NEVER wore a condom and as unbelievable as it sounds, I cannot remember having an outbreak during the whole time we were together.

So my question would be this - if I have had herpes for so long, does it lose its "potency" ? I mean, I have been with other men as well who did not wear a condom and I have never heard from any of them that they contracted the virus.

I have recently met a new man and we are getting quite serious. He has asked me to see my GP and have a whole slew of STD tests (herpes, chlamydia, ghonnorea (sp ?)...etc.). I am not worried about anything except the herpes test coming back positive.

Do you think it will, even if I haven't had an outbreak for so long and it would seem as if I don't spread it that easily ?

I feel like a 40-something idiot asking these questions but any help and/or information anyone could provide would be very very much appreciated.

Many thanks in advance

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Nemonamedjoe

First off no question is stupid when dealing with something like this...You are actually smarter for wanting to know more information....

First off no matter how long you've had it as far as i know it is always possible to spread it you may have fewer outbreaks but who knows how much you are shedding ya know?

2nd Yes the test will come back positive your body still has the anti bodies protecting you from the virus unfortuantly..

And now the good news..If you and this special man really are seriouse this should be nothing really just try talking to him and explain the situation if he really cares and loves you this should not bother him the least

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curecomingverysoon

Anecdotal evidence does indicate that outbreaks becomes much less frequent over time. We do not know if the same holds true for shedding but to me this seems like a logical correlation. So right there is a definite plus in your corner.

Almost certainly your herpes test will come back positive but that is because your antibodies will be pretty high as they will have been protecting your body from HSV for so long.

You need to get yourself educated so that you can educate him. Do you have HSV 2 or HSV 1 genitally? If it's HSV 2 then transmission rates from female to male are 4% in a given year, provided you abstain during outbreaks. If you always use condoms, transmission rate drops to 2%. If you go on suppressive antiviral treatment, that 2% figure holds. If you use condoms and antivirals, the transmission rate is an almost negligible 1%. Know all this and be confident in explaining it to him -- the Westover Heights Clinic has an excellent manual for you both to learn: http://www.westoverheights.com/genital_herpes/handbook.html

Good luck! And if you have a chance, please share a little more of your herpes story on the board -- there are many newly infected individuals who might benefit from your experience.

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gotitsowhat

Just tell him

and you won't have to worry about keeping a secret. But, yes, you still have herpes even if the outbreaks are rare after all these years. I have had herpes for about 12 years now and rarely have outbreaks. A test would still show that you had herpes. However, most STD screenings do not include herpes tests. Nevertheless, you should tell him about it and give him a chance to decide whether he wants to take the chance of transmission. It seems as if the chances would not be that great, especially with protection and antiviral meds. But give him the opportunity to decide.

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