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Birdbath

New member-is my life over now?

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Birdbath

I was in a 2 1/2 yr relationship and at the end, I ended up with herpes 1 in the genital area. My boyfriend said he remembers he had a cold sore in his mouth and we had oral sex. He never told me about the cold sores.

I am so upset daily and would love to sue him but he has no assets. I have to take Valtrex daily now.

How do you deal with this dilemma?

I can sue pro se (myself) and maybe get a Judgment or an Order for him to pay my medical bills and pills but is it worth it?

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Ultra Violet

Your thread title doesn't really describe the content of your post. I'm not going to comment on the suing thing as others are better qualified to do that.

I will comment on the title of your post. Your life doesn't have to be over. The virus is very small, and you are more than that. You'll be surprised how little your life may change. A lot is up to you. We don't always have choices but we always have a choice about our attitude.

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TheArcheologist

I have the same issue with H one down below, it's really hard to sue or so I've herd. My year and a half relationship ended a few weeks ago and I didn't even see sueing as an option. It's tough but give it time the people here are really cool. Post in the NJ tread as soon as i have five people or so interested I'm thinking of starting a support group here.

If you need help with anything feel free to send a PM to just about anyone

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gotitsowhat

About lawsuits, Valtrex and life being over (not!)...

The lawsuit: You might want to post in the legal part of this website where people can give you better information. But it is my general impression that in order to sue, you need to prove that you got it from them (and hsv 1 is extremely common) and that they knew about it or should have. Both things are very hard to prove. However, some people have won similar suits occasionally. Again, check with the legal part of this website.

Valtrex: Who told you that you have to take Valtrex every day for the rest of your life???!!! I think you may need a second opinion. First of all, many of us who have herpes (I have hsv2, GH) do not take meds regularly. For one thing, after a while the outbreaks become fewer and far between and less severe. For another thing, some doctors believe that it's best to let your immune system build up its own immunity rather than relying entirely on drugs (I have had two doctors, an internist and a gynecologist tell me this). So you need to see another doctor and discuss these possibilities. Also, you might want to know that Accyclovir is basically the same drug but much cheaper. the main difference between Valtrex and Accyclovir, according to my doctor, is that you have to take more pills with Accyclovir.

I am like many people with herpes; I only take a drug (in my case Vatrex) when I have an outbreak, and even then, only for a severe outbreak during the first few days. I have found that it helps to shorten the duration of the outbreak. I also use Dynamaclear which has helped a lot; it lesses the frequency of outbreaks and heals them faster.

I have had herpes, GH, now for about 14 years. For the first two years, on a doctor's advice, I did not use any drugs other than a topical pain reliever.

As for your life being over, I do know that kind of feeling. Really, though, it's not about your life being over, it's about having to make some adjustments in your lifestyle and thinking. The problems, though real, or probably not going to be as monumental as you fear.

Hope you feel better soon.

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