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What would a man do?


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It seems to me from reading most of the responses on this board that women in general are very forgiving and understanding when it comes to contracting H, but what about men? I would like to know if any men have forgiven the women that gave them H? I would also like to know if any of these men stayed with the women and if so what made them stay and work things out? Also, if you had a partner that did not tell you they had H and you contracted it, would you forgive them and work things out? I would like to know how understanding men are.

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well I was sort of accepting of the fact that I got it from the girl who gave it to me but Im fucking pissed at the same time....chances are judging by her reaction when I told her she had no idea that she had it. Nontheless she got it because she was a slut and pretty much lied about the number of people she had been with. Theres no way I would have touched her with a 10 foot sterilized pole if I had known she had been with 8 guys in a six month time period.

So it depends on the circumstances. I personally hope that girl gets hit by a truck. Had I got it from a girlfriend or someone who I cared about I wouldnt feel the same.

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First off I don't think woman are any more forgiving, it just depends on the circumstances. I can not forgive the person who gave this to me not because they didn't tell me but because they never cared about me or loved me. If they loved me and wanted to be with me and stood by me after they gave it to me it would have made all the difference. He was more than just dishonest. there are many reasons why people don't tell the truth and you probably know what they are; pride, shame, fear, etc. It seems it is hardest to tell the ones we care about the most for fear of rejection. Were you not told? Have you talked to the person about what happened? Maybe they did not know, this seems to be how many people get it. was the person sorry for giving it to you, did they love you? When I first got h I gave it to someone. I wasn't really sure I had it, was partially in denial, and didn't realize the magnitude of giving it to someone else. I think about this person everyday, it breaks my heart knowing I hurt someone I adored. Only the individual can decide if it is worth it to forgive. Is the person worth forgiving? If you could make each other happy and move beyond it would it be worth it? It might be hard to salvage a relationship with these circumstances but in the larger scheme of things, h is a small matter in comparison with love.

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I got Herpes from my husband 10 years ago-I didn't know he had it until I got it! Still not sure that he had it before he met me-as he claims - or if he got it when I was newly pregnant with our first child! Anyway it ended up in me having to have a caesarian because my first attack of herpes happened when I was 8 months pregnant and I delivered a month early. My son was put in the Special Baby Unit and fed a course of Acyclovar. I didn't see him for 24 hours and it really affected our bonding. My now ex-husband has always been totally unrepentant and continues to sleep around without telling his partners about H. I feel totally different and won't even accept a "date" with someone in case they expect sex afterwards and I know I can't admit this to anyone else.

I feel lost forever because of this affliction and at the same time I have to be aware that my husband doesn't seem to care whether he passes it on or not!! So he's happy and I'm forever alone.

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    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @Lcj987 and welcome to the website. You can be sure that isn't HSV-2, looks nothing like it. It is much more likely to be folliculitis or inflamed fordyce spots.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @JackThrowAway herpes causes an outbreak where it enters the body first and maybe a progressive spread. If it doesn't cause an outbreak at the entry site then it won't cause one elsewhere, it also won't 'jump' upon infection - it would be more likely that the lesions are continuous from the penis to the anus. Nevertheless, testing trumps symptoms or any interpretation of symptoms. The correct conclusive result arises when: you have a positive swab; or An IgG HSV-2 level over 3.5 (Herpeselect test).
    • Lcj987
      Slept with someone unprotected, roughly 2 weeks ago now. I felt generally unwell the couple of days after but I’d been drinking the whole weekend and didn’t have much sleep either of the days of that weekend so put it down to that. 6 days after I noticed these spots appear on the shaft of my penis. Along with symptoms of discomfort in my shaft in the couple of days prior to them appearing. No pain when urinating at all that I have noticed. They don’t hurt, itch or tingle and they don’t have fluid in from what I can see or feel if I squeeze them and have never burst? I went to a sexual health clinic to get checked up, they took bloods to do a full test and looked at the spots but said they saw nothing that concerned them but I’m not sure about that, any advice? The smaller spots under the shaft are just follicles I had diagnosed years ago and non-sti related.
    • JackThrowAway
      She tested positive for HSV2. No, there was nothing of that sort in that area.   However I also have ulcerative colitis so I’m on medication that makes me immunosuppressed. I have been bleeding a bit when I pass stools during the time of redness, so I’m unsure if I’m getting a flare from the colitis (from all the stress of everything) or if it’s due to the virus making it’s way to an already inflamed area and popping up as blisters that I can’t see and hence the bleeding.    I had two equivocal results (at 4 weeks and 6 weeks) that then went to a positive result (7 weeks after exposure). Combine that with some flu symptoms, redness, tingling etc. makes me feel it’s conclusive that this points to a hsv2 infection.
    • Anonimus
      Thanks!!!!! I appreciate your help.
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