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When to tell a person that you are seeing?


pixi7272

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I know and understand that i have to tell anyone that i intend to become intimate with. However I am not sure when is the right time to tell someone.

I have just recently contracted Herpes and so I have not had to go through the H discussion. And so i am not sure when, how, or what to say to a person. Any suggestions or past experiences would be amazingly helpful.

This is my situation: I contracted Herpes about 3 weeks ago. And then about a Week and half ago i Started seeing someone. We have just been going out on dates talking and kissing nothing major. I have been waiting to tell him because I have been trying to feel him out and see how he might react to information such as this. I have told a few friends of mine Friends that i know would be there for me in my time of need. However i am very scared and concerned about having to tell someone i don/t know all that well.. And what I fear the most is the fact that this guy and i Work together and that if he takes the news badly he will send it through work and just demoralize my character... Although i don?t think that he is that type of person, but you know how your imagination can just run wild.

I don?t want to wait to long because I don?t want him to get mad about the fact that I am withholding this information. But at the same time I don?t want to tell him right off the bat and take the chance of freaking him out?. So I just thought that I would throw this out for discussion and see what ya?ll thought or have experienced in the past.

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Same Story

But I already told my friend, not sure yet if it was a good idea. will probably know this weekend if we go out or not. Good luck to you.

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well i just contracted herpes and i had a friend that lived in stl when im from kc. I broke the news to him online. he said he was fine with it and he can deal with it but it seems that now he is avoiding me. I told him i would understand if he didnt want to take it further but he acted if he did. So honey just go by what you feel you never really know the reaction that you will get. Just have faith that everything will work out and if he cant handle someone can.

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Seems ok for now

So far so good. My dating friend & I have been out 2 times since I told him. He has been wonderful. Said it doens't bother him and when it's the time we'll practice safe sex. He's been very loving and doesn't treat me like I'm non touchable. I think I am very lucky cause this is the 1st time I've had to tell a partner. We are planning another weekend of dates this weekend and I can't wait. Although it's hard (mostly cause I'm an impatient person) I am trusting that what is right will happen.

I do have to say that this site has been so great. To see that I'm not alone well it was a lifesaver. Thanks to all that contribute.

Remember, life is not measured by the number of minutes but the number of moments that take your breathe away!

Angel with hope!

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    • FirstTimeUser
      @WilsoInAuswould appreciate your thoughts as have seen you comment quite a bit before!
    • Marlena
      Good morning. My name is Marlena and I come from Poland. Sorry, my English is average. For two years I have been in a relationship with a man, for a year and a half I have been struggling with intimate problems. On average, my intimate condition is getting worse every month. Then I feel itching, redness, swelling around the entrance to the vagina, small blisters (not always). Most often it is only red and swollen, itches and then disappears. This state lasts 3-4 days. I come from a small town, doctors don't know what it is. They say it's 'skin irritation'. They prescribe moisturizing creams with lactic acid, probiotics. It doesn't help. I did a blood test for HSV on my own, which is very expensive in Poland, but it does not separate HSV1 from HSV2. The doctor, when he shows these results, says that it's not herpes, but irritation. I would like to add that in the past I suffered from herpes on the lips, then it was a 'scab'. There has never been a scab in an intimate area. Sometimes there are blisters that last 1-2 days, but not always. So what do high blood test results mean? I would like to add that in Poland people do not talk about the HSV virus. It's just that sometimes someone has it on their lips and that's it. Results translation: IgM HSV 1/2: questionable IgG HSV 1/2: result above the measuring range https://files.fm/f/4cpu7uee4  
    • FirstTimeUser
      This is my first time posting here. Im generally pretty anxious when it comes to anything to do with health conditions etc. For context I have had jock itch and fungal infections previously on my buttcrack. I have had 0 new sexual partners and I am not concerned about my girlfriend cheating at all. 4 days ago my balls began itching and red pretty much all over, as you can see some general flakeyness and what looks to be a lesion I noticed on Monday when I checked them out. My partner and I do get cold sores from time to time so the anxious part of me is concerned this could be herpes, but at the same time could be some sort of fungal infection. My doctor cant see me until tomorrow so I just have to worry until then. There is no pain and nothing on the penis or anywhere else, just general itchiness. Any ideas if this is herpes or not?  
    • Jeremy Spokein
      Yes, but every married person who I found out about that has this waited 6-8 months into the relationship to disclose it. But maybe you're right. If I had told her 6-7 months in, she'd still have Googled it and flipped out, and maybe it would have been harder then. I don't know. I don't see myself going through this level of pain and rejection so easily next time. I really don't. I'm taking the meds. I use protection. It's been almost a decade since I've had it so I'm not worried about shedding or passing it on so easily. British studies confirm that the first 2 years are the most contagious and we're passed that. I'm just over this. I've never been in so much emotional pain in my life.
    • Possiblehypercon11
      @WilsoInAus would really appreciate your input please. Kinda freaking out lol. 
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