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Is your relationship like this? Looking for feedback.


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I've read a lot about couples that practice safe unprotected sex in their relationship where the woman is HSV2+ and the man is negative. These women can go months or years without transmitting the virus to their man.

Are there any couples on here that are in the opposite scenario? Where the man is HSV2 positive and the woman is negative and practicing safe unprotected sex to keep from transmitting the virus to the woman?

I would like to hear about this if you are or have tried. Please share the details of how long it lasted or is lasting.

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Yes, you are absolutely correct. What I was referring to is the HSV+ male using suppressive medication, and avoiding sex during prodome and outbreak. I've read stories about how women that are HSV2+ have been in relationships with HSV2 negative men going sometime without infecting her partner. Take Lasmom for example. I'm completely familiar with how a woman has a higher risk of being infected which is what actually motivates me to ask the question "Does this work as well if the roles are reversed".

I'm curious as to how long an HSV2+ male "has gone" or "is going" in a relationship without infecting his HSV2 negative woman. This is while using supressive medication and avoiding sex during prodome and outbreaks to reduce the risk of transmission.

Actually, I would be interested to hear how long you've gone without transmitting the virus whether you are using a condom or not.

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thats the problem with all this though. If anyone knew of a way to be absolutely sure that the other person is safe 100% of the time, there would be no concern over this....thered be no forum, no one would care if they got it or not because itd be a pretty insignificant problem that wouldnt change much. No one with chronic Hep B worries like this because in that case, there is a simple solution thru vaccination for their partners.

As far as what you're asking....yes, it happens a lot without people infecting their partners. Asymptomatic shedding is blown astronomically out of proportion. Im willing to bet 90% of the people on this site got it from someone who didnt know they had it or had it and didnt understand how to tell when its active (mild ob symptoms). I dunno, Ive read of men in relationships for 10+ years that rarely have sex with condoms that havent passed it on. Search the archives here...people here have done it without passing it on. Basically its all a comfort level. male to female infection ranges somewhere between 7 and 16 percent depending on what you read...half that with supression. Ultimately you're asking about something thats more a question of comfort versus guarantees for something that cant be guaranteed. If your girl is okay with the idea, go for it.

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If I understand the question correctly you are wanting to know about relationships where the man is HS2+ and the woman, I am presuming you is not a Herpes carrier.

If this is the case, the best question to ask your mate is since they contracted the disease how many sexual partners have they had, how many did they tell they had the disease, and how many contracted the disease.

Woman are prone to contracting Herpes from a man morso than a man contracting the disease from a woman. Protect yourself my sister. Use a condom get a full std workup including HIV and yeast.... if you are choosing to trust this individual, you are essentially trusting him with your life. Do not make the choice lightly.

On the flip side if this person told you the truth, they are probably more responsible than not.

Good luck.

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    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @Lcj987 and welcome to the website. You can be sure that isn't HSV-2, looks nothing like it. It is much more likely to be folliculitis or inflamed fordyce spots.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @JackThrowAway herpes causes an outbreak where it enters the body first and maybe a progressive spread. If it doesn't cause an outbreak at the entry site then it won't cause one elsewhere, it also won't 'jump' upon infection - it would be more likely that the lesions are continuous from the penis to the anus. Nevertheless, testing trumps symptoms or any interpretation of symptoms. The correct conclusive result arises when: you have a positive swab; or An IgG HSV-2 level over 3.5 (Herpeselect test).
    • Lcj987
      Slept with someone unprotected, roughly 2 weeks ago now. I felt generally unwell the couple of days after but I’d been drinking the whole weekend and didn’t have much sleep either of the days of that weekend so put it down to that. 6 days after I noticed these spots appear on the shaft of my penis. Along with symptoms of discomfort in my shaft in the couple of days prior to them appearing. No pain when urinating at all that I have noticed. They don’t hurt, itch or tingle and they don’t have fluid in from what I can see or feel if I squeeze them and have never burst? I went to a sexual health clinic to get checked up, they took bloods to do a full test and looked at the spots but said they saw nothing that concerned them but I’m not sure about that, any advice? The smaller spots under the shaft are just follicles I had diagnosed years ago and non-sti related.
    • JackThrowAway
      She tested positive for HSV2. No, there was nothing of that sort in that area.   However I also have ulcerative colitis so I’m on medication that makes me immunosuppressed. I have been bleeding a bit when I pass stools during the time of redness, so I’m unsure if I’m getting a flare from the colitis (from all the stress of everything) or if it’s due to the virus making it’s way to an already inflamed area and popping up as blisters that I can’t see and hence the bleeding.    I had two equivocal results (at 4 weeks and 6 weeks) that then went to a positive result (7 weeks after exposure). Combine that with some flu symptoms, redness, tingling etc. makes me feel it’s conclusive that this points to a hsv2 infection.
    • Anonimus
      Thanks!!!!! I appreciate your help.
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