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ellen

On my mind constantly

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ellen

Its been just over a year, and i was doing fine at the start of the year, but now i have a bf and its on my mind 24/7. If Im not on the net looking for triggers and how to prevent Ob's and remedies ect. Im just constantly thinking about how i have it, how i dont want my partner to get it, its effecting our sex life and even my personal life. I was out on Sat night and the whole time I thought I have herpes and i want to be home or lookig around the room thinking do u have it or am I the only one...I know Im probably not but just feel like I am. I wake up in the middle of the night and think about it, then wash my hands just in case I have touched myself while I was asleep, if I get a cut on my finger i cover it with a band aid for fear of getting it on my hands, I never touch my eyes unless i have washed my hands then sanitised, I have even checked my self in the mirror then gone back to bed????

Its just wont get out of my head!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Its driving me insane!!

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lizabeth

I'm really really sorry it's consuming you....

take it an hour at a time not thinking about it.. Do something to keep busy.. help someone else on this site... ...

Stress will cause OB ... enjoy that he knows and he's still with you! That's great news!!

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Lookonthesunnyside

Aww, Im sorry to hear you're going through such a hard time. I went through something similar during my first relationship after my diagnosis. I was constantly stressing over it and worrying. I unfortunately dont have any tried and true advise because that relationship ended throughout all of that. But I think it may help to share your feelings with your partner. I didnt want to "burden" my bf with my worries, and was embarrassed to be bringing it up. But once he found out that I had been worrying he encouraged me to talk to him about it. Have you done that? I think once its out in the open you two can take things slow and kinda work through those issues. I know its not the carefree kinda sex life you want to have, but if you get over this then you can pretty much go back to that right?

Also, are you sure of how you feel about this relationship? Do you feel like if worst comes to worst and you gave this to him that you two would be together for a while? I think if you have any doubts about the relationship then that can make these worries a lot more intense. If you feel confident in your relationship then I think you need to try really hard to remind yourself that your boyfriend has made a choice. A choice that maybe you werent given? And if you two have something special then herpes really isnt a huge deal.

Also, this may sound kind of odd. But one thing that reassures me is admitting to myself that when I slept with the person who gave this to me, I was (in a in denial sort of way) accepting this risk. I used a condom and never expected to get anything, but I mean there was a part of me that knew it wasnt absolutely impossible for me to contract anything. So if I was willing to take that risk on him (who's an ass!), then I think that I'm worth that risk as well.

You are worth the risk and your boyfriend has clearly already decided this. Stressing out will only make things worse so do your best to make peace with the situation. You cant change the fact that you have herpes but you can adjust your attitude about it and how it affects your life and your relationship.

I hope you start to feel better about this ;)

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GntiNh

I know it's really hard not to think about it. It's all tied into accepting yourself.

I rarely think about it now, even though I check in here most days. Herpes is part of me, I don't like it but I can't change it.

I hope you get some rest soon. Stress is not good for my body or your mind.

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ellen

on my mind

HI

Thanks for the support. As much as I try to accept myself there is always apart of me that just wont let me. I am a major stresser and worrier always have been so learning how to relax and not worry is hard!

My doc has put me on famvir everyday to see how i go! So hopefully it works!

I just feel like im constantly taking tablets, it surely cant be good to take so much!!

Thanks again

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GntiNh
Thanks for the support. As much as I try to accept myself there is always apart of me that just wont let me. I am a major stresser and worrier always have been so learning how to relax and not worry is hard!

Tell me about it ! I know it's so hard - have you tried distraction techniques ? Something that totally blocks out everything else, even for a few minutes to try and get some relief.

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pinklove07

Hey I know exactly what your going through!I was diagnosed three months ago so its still pretty new to me.I'm still in shock I have it and it's on my mind all the time as well.I have tried to keep busy and hang out with friends,it works for awhile.But it's hard.Just hang in there your not alone!

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bluebell21

advice needed

i am currently new to this place and i am prob not even posting this to the right place , i got herpes a few years ago and i never give it a thought until now , i have not ever had an outbreak since. i shaved down below a few days ago and now i have come out in bumps again that itch and are sore , but they are only on the lip of the vagina and nowhere else , they do not look like herpes , as they are not how i remember them to be , i looked up a similar thing called genital folliculitus and wonder if it could be this ? tho there seems to be limited information out there on the web. has anyone had herpes before and had this folliculitos condition and confused it with herpes?that i am going to see a doctor tomorrow i am so scared that it has returned , especially that i have been with my bf for 4 yrs and didnt tell him :-( please help if anyone can shed some light on the similarity between herpes and folliculitos? thanks !

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