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Kat07

Just found out

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Kat07

So...I just found out yesterday that I have genital herpes...im really frustrated because the guy I am sure I got it from is just really convinced that he doesnt have it, just because he has never had anything show up on his genitals. I was in a relationship with a guy for almost two years and broke up with him but while I was with him I never had any signs/symptoms of herpes...but then a few days after I start sleeping with this new guy something shows up down there. I feel so disgusting and ruined and really cheated because the guy I am sure I got it from is really convinced he doesnt have it and that I got it from somewhere else. I found out that the guy I slept with is very irresponsible and sleeps around with alot of different women. I'm so frustrated right now

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Butterfly of the Moment

Hello darling, be strong and learn more about herpes....if you get a blood test it may tell you if you've just been exposed to the herpes virus or if you've had it for a while...as for the man you think gave it to you, he needs a dose of reality...tell him that about 40% or more of people don't have any symptoms and that only when you started sleeping with him did you get any so strongly suggest that he gets tested...I'm sorry I don't understand people who are in denial about giving someone something like a virus/std....i've been tested for stds like 5 times in my life...I'm one of those people that needs to know the truth/status about stds even if it hurts..."ignorance is bliss" is true in a way but it's only temporary...It's hard for most to come to terms with this but there are thousands of people on this site who understand...

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Kat07

He said he is going to get blood tested today..but I read that a blood test will only determine if you have antibodies to fight the virus. Can a blood test determine if you have had it for a while? I get cold sores every now and then..so I am sure it would say I have antibodies to fight the virus but can it tell the difference between the two HSV's?

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TinyCHILD

So...I just found out yesterday that I have genital herpes...im really frustrated because the guy I am sure I got it from is just really convinced that he doesnt have it, just because he has never had anything show up on his genitals. I was in a relationship with a guy for almost two years and broke up with him but while I was with him I never had any signs/symptoms of herpes...but then a few days after I start sleeping with this new guy something shows up down there. I feel so disgusting and ruined and really cheated because the guy I am sure I got it from is really convinced he doesnt have it and that I got it from somewhere else. I found out that the guy I slept with is very irresponsible and sleeps around with alot of different women. I'm so frustrated right now

Well we can rephase that and could say that he really got "you" convinced. It is no reason to convinced ourself with we got something or not. In life there is a yes or a no. there is no maybe,sorta,kinda those are words that cry out for superman to come out and save the world. But in other hand you need to start a new chapter in your life and move to the next one.

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Butterfly of the Moment

Hello again, yes a bloodtest can tell if you have type 1 or 2 and can also tell you the amount of antibodies in your system....anyone else feel free to correct me on here if you know exactly what the blood test is called...look to the right panel and you'll see under the DIAGNOSIS section the Blood Test Facts...

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Kat07

Thank you...so if he gets the results back and he has alot of antibodies then he has obviously had it? I am so mad cause he was like well I dont have anything on my **** and never had and blah blah blah and was telling me he talked to a nurse n the nurse told him that if he didnt have an outbreak within 4-7 days of being in contact with the virus then he most likely doesnt have it. And he is telling me well you owe me an apology when the results come back and I dont have it. I'm thinkin to myself, how in the world is it that I have sex with the same person for almost two years, he is in the military so he receives STD checks- and nothing popped up ever like this before while we were having sex...and then all the sudden with him and I break up and I get with this other guy just a few days after we start having sex I have a BO?!?!? Ugh I am sooooo angry.

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Butterfly of the Moment

it is common for some doctors and nurses to not have the most up to date information about herpes...i know this from personal experience and you will find a whole thread on this topic somewhere in the archives but nevertheless, you can get symptoms as early as 2 days after initial contact with an infected person or it could take months. Approximately 40% of people do not get symptoms or don't recognize the symptoms for what they are....so therefore the nurse is misinformed and the man should do his own research before he says you're wrong...these are facts...i don't understand how people in the medical profession would share any information that they are not sure about.

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SeizeTheDay07

He should be more understanding and definitely not be hesitant about getting checked. Make sure he gets tested for herpes specifically, because I have been getting tested for "everything" since I was 17. I am now 20 and had my first outbreak the beginning of June, a couple of weeks before I actually turned 20. Anyway, I got tested to see if it was old or new and it was actually old. I'm over it now, I can only protect future partners and don't dwell on who gave it to me since, either way, I have it and can't do much about it. It's really not that big of a deal. Yeah, it sucks. Yeah, it also sucks telling future partners especially when you're so young. But oh well. There are worse things and actually being alone is not such a bad thing. Getting to know yourself is very important. Discover new strengths. There are people who accept you and want to be with you regardless. Heck, who knows, maybe they have something too!

He sounds really immature and insensitive to your common situation. I suggest to distance yourself after the results come in. [Just a suggestion]

Good luck! ;)

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Kat07

See thats what im confused about too...I already have gotten cold sores for years now..so if I just had my first out break of HSV2..if they do a blood test yeah they will test for antibodies but how can they tell the difference if you have had cold sores for so long or if you have had genital herpes for so long??

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solvingtheproblem

here's the deal

Physicians initially tell people whose blood tests results come back positive that they have "been exposed to herpes" -- it's the kinder, gentler way to tell people that they have a positive test result. However, once the person has wrapped their head around the fact that they have been exposed, it is IRRESPONSIBLE of the physician to not follow through with the real truth -- that an antibody presence significant enough to show up as a "positive" score means that HSV is in their system -- permanently. With HSV, there's unfortunately no "I was exposed to it, tested positive, then it went away". If antibodies are in your system to a significant level, then you have HSV. Any physician that lets it go as "you've been exposed" is not doing their job.

Generally, a person cannot tell how long he or she has had the virus. There is an exception: when you have your first outbreak. The virus shows up in the swab test, but your immune system hasn't had the opportunity to create enough antibodies to show up in the blood test.

If this is the case, you are actually at the only time you'll ever have to determine if this is newly contracted, or if it's an old infection that is finally rearing its awful head after years of dormancy (either you or your partner could have had it laying dormant in your systems for many years). It is my understanding that:

+ive swab test test results + -ive blood test results = new infection

+ive swab test test results + +ive blood test results = old infection

Here is another excellent way of explaining this.

So make sure you get both of these tests done NOW, as they are time-critical. Antibodies usually show up in significant quantities (aka you "seroconvert") within 12-16 weeks of initial infection. Also, make sure you have an IgG blood test -- IgM blood tests are not accurate, but unfortunately some physicians still give perform this one. I'd especially see if they can do the HerpeSelect Immunoblot test -- it gives individual scores for HSV1 and HSV2. It won't tell you where it is, but given the fact that you've had OHSV1 for years, you won't be getting HSV2 in that location -- so it's logical to conclude you have OHSV1 and GHSV2.

IMO, your BF needs to put on his big-boy pants and do some homework -- if he is sexually active, he has exposed himself to STDs, even if he's always used a condom (they are only 30-50% effective at blocking HSV2, because once a person has it they can shed the virus on any skin surface connected to the sacral ganglia -- the yellow places on this diagram -- even when there are NO SYMPTOMS). Given that 50 million people in the US have HSV2, and 90% of them don't know it, there's a distinct possibility that he could be one of those millions of asymptomatic people -- I happen to be one, and if I hadn't had the blood test, I would never have known.

And lastly, I am truly sorry to hear of your news...it's a tough thing to come to terms with. Please feel free to come to this forum and post anything you're feeling -- it's a very supportive environment, filled with people who know exactly what you're going through. Ultimately, you WILL be OK! :-)

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