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UUGG!!! I'm totally new to this

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So yeah I'm all new to this. And I have tons of questions. I'm pregnant and found out that I have genital herpes. Not the most exciting information you want to find out when your having a kid. In fact I'm hella skared for my lil girl. I dont want to infect her. So with that I guess a c-section is the answer right. Well her father is the person I got this crap from and he totally denies having it and absolutly refuses to get tested. I'm the type of person who keeps my self checked and I didnt have it with in the past year so who else would I have gotten it from? He's the only person Ive been with since Aug of 2008. And he must be new to it (well I wouldnt know that bc we normally used condoms & of course as soon as we dont....) as well. What are the laws against spreading genital herpes? No its not me that I'm concerned with bc I'm very upfront and honest ( as you can tell ). Its him. Hes started to cheat on me and could possibly spread this stuff to another chick and I dont want to see that happen. Why should more innocent people be infected when they dont have to be? Like I said before he totally denies that he has and refuses to get tested. WHAT DO I DO???

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Butterfly of the Moment

Hi, I'm sorry that the guy you were dating is a coward and won't man up to his responsibility...the fact that he refuses to get tested really says it all....unfortunately if he didn't "know" he had herpes you can't really sue him...the fact that there is no medical record of him having herpes will not do you much good...but yes, there are cases of people suing others for infecting them with herpes without disclosing their status when the person KNEW they had herpes. And sometimes it's hard to prove someone gave you herpes sometimes b/c the virus is tricky and can lay dormant in your body for months or even years before appearing as an outbreak...unless you've been tested specifically for herpes (you have to ASK for it 99% of the time from your doctor b/c regular full std tests don't include it), and came back negative, and didn't have sex with anyone except him after getting tested, then I think it's safe to say he gave you the virus.

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Hi Momma!

Welcome to our club!

And don't automatically think you have to have a C section. I have been in chat rooms where plenty of women comment that they have had natural deliveries. They just have to watch you extra careful and put you on antivirals prior to delivery. There are articles on this site that speak to herpes pregnancies, so I suggest you read all you can.

In the past were you specifically tested for herpes? I read here not too long ago a post from someone who had been married for years and was just now having her first ob. Her husband tested negative and her dr. said she probably had it all along and the stress of pregnancy finally caused her to have an ob.

Try and not worry about who to blame. You have it, and that will not change. Focus on staying healthy and all the fun you will have with your daughter.

Good luck!


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Try a Lysine supplement for cold sores

  • The Hive is Thriving!

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    • Herpeguy562
      Give it a try and report back to us. It's pretty safe vaccine approved by the FDA.
    • Skye249
      Have you tried changing your GP surgery? A decent doctor must surely realise that having back to back outbreaks warrants long term suppressive medication.  Aciclovir is available at very low cost to the NHS. I'd be firm with your doctor in what you'd like to do and make it clear you are educated on the relevant issues.  Don't be ashamed to talk to your GP. It is confidential.  FYI - walk in sexual health clinics (separate health record) are only as allowed to dispense a limited amount on the basis of episodic treatments. 
    • WilsoInAus
      I agree, herpes doesn’t show up as discrete little dots like your pic.
    • HereAndNowLater
      @Kurdt01Thank you! Very validating! And yes many doctors are so uninformed and misinformed it's incredibly frustrating.  ur right in multiple forums I've seen commenters invalidate someone's experience with herpes which is so weird. There's a wealth of experiences similar to both of ours but people put their hands to their ears and drill home "herpes is just a minor rash outbreak, nothing more."
    • friendlyboy
      I got the zinc acetate from an pharmacy in my town, they can't sell reagents but I know the pharmacist. I cost me about 10 € a 50 gr bottle, enough for a decade at the current rate of consumtion. Otherwise it is quite easy to get, you can buy it from a laboratory or even in ebay. I apply the treatment on my glans about 2-3 times a week, I've never had any problem or adverse effect so far.

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