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Too much misinformation

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I just want to say thanks to all those who have spoken to me in the past week. Your advice has been great.... however I do not think I will be turning to anymore forums and the internet in general for help. There is just too much misinformation and bullshit out there. I'm sticking to speaking with my doctor. It seems the more I read the more confused I'm becoming and the less I am able to answer my guy's questions. He has still shown no symptoms, and all the clinics he has been to have told him chances of the virus showing up in his blood test is slim. It's a strange situation as I have never had symptoms myself until I met him....had an outbreak 2 weeks after our first time having sex and now I have genital herpes.... And I am disgusted with the way the medical world doesn't see this as something that should be tested for when they test for everything else. I am very confused with what I have been told about blood tests, both on this site and by sex clinics.

Again thanks to all those who sent me words of encouragement... good luck to you all.

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It sucks you're so frustrated. I've had this for four years now. I too am pissed that they aren't more proactive and test for this routinely. In fact, some doctors will tell you they can't without an outbreak. Well, what good is it then?

I'm as equally as frustrated over HPV. They don't even test men, at all. Yet, men are carriers. So, does a guy have it? We'll never know. They don't test women routinely until they are 30 or have an irregular pap. Again, what good is it at that point? Damage is done!

So, you say they say the virus won't show up? My understanding is they can test your blood for antibodies. They can test him. I'm sure of it. You're not the first person to tell me a "clinic" was standoffish towards testing for HSV. It's bull.. I know.

My instinct tells me that if you never had symptoms and then you slept with him then suddenly did, he gave it to you. If it barks and wags it's tail, it's a dog, ya know? People can carry this virus with no symptoms. If he's had it longer than you, he could go without an outbreak for a long time. Some people only ever get one. Some apparently never get symptoms.

Hope you come back. I think everyone here has felt your frustration.

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The Internet is confusing but so are doctors!

Trying to sort through herpes confusion is often the first problem a herpes sufferer has. It took me going to 6 doctors before I was diagnosed. It is against the policy of clinics and most doctors to test for herpes if they can avoid it. In my experience, as confusing as the Internet can be, clinics and doctors are more confusing. At least on the Internet you can find sites like this one where people can speak together in a forum and share information. I have learned a lot here. And there are groups like the ASHA group that have clear, easy to understand information. At least the Internet doesn't have an official policy of not giving you information about herpes as the medical profession does. Doctors do not like to test for herpes or to diagnose it due to the social stigma.

They are not telling the truth about your boyfriend or he is not telling you the truth. If he has herpes, it will show up on a blood test. He should get the kind of blood test that tells what type of herpes it is, since some of the older tests don't and that can be confusing since most people carry some form of the herpes virus. He could ask for the Western Blot test which is considered accurate if given at least 3 months from exposure.

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Try a Lysine supplement for cold sores

  • The Hive is Thriving!

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    • valleynovascotia
      Any advice on on how i can change the way she thinks of her insecurities in the event I ever see her again or hang out with her or do you guys think that it's better too just walk away. The truth is though i never met another girl like her before and she was fine with me having herpes i could tell by the she reacted too it . How do you change the way someone views them self that has low self esteem. 
    • WilsoInAus
      Note @Asr624 that an IgM result does not confirm a herpes diagnosis. Was the rash swabbed as well?
    • LiveLife100
      Yes it's entirely possible that he didn't know and just now gave it to you. I've been with my husband almost 19 years and he was recently tested and is still negative. It's still possible of course that I could give it to him at any point. Sounds like you have a strong marriage and there is no reason this needs to be an issue other than a minor annoyance. I have 2 healthy children and have had no related medical issues due to HSV.
    • Hellothere123
      I have been with him and didn’t tell him and now I can’t tell him because I know it would ruin any chance of reconciliation. I don’t want to live with this and I don’t want to live without him 
    • Asr624
      I am so sorry that happened to you. No one deserves that. Praying for you. 

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