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mia

im so scared, idk what it is yet.

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mia

i need someone to talk to that has this infection because im afraid i have it and im so scared im very young just moved into a apartment with a roomate and just started college and finally got a real serious boyfriend that i love and i dont want to lose, and im almost positive this infection couldnt have came from him he was in a 3 yr relationship and im only his second partnet so im so scared right now i dont know what to do i want to talk to my mom but im even to scared to do that, and im in so much pain i can barley walk but i have to go to school everyday and i just dont know what to do or who to talk to about it and i dont want to tell my roomate because im scared she is going to be grossed out by it and im not comfortable with her knowing yet. im miserable and im freaking out , someone help me :(

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FaithfulOne
i need someone to talk to that has this infection because im afraid i have it and im so scared im very young just moved into a apartment with a roomate and just started college and finally got a real serious boyfriend that i love and i dont want to lose, and im almost positive this infection couldnt have came from him he was in a 3 yr relationship and im only his second partnet so im so scared right now i dont know what to do i want to talk to my mom but im even to scared to do that, and im in so much pain i can barley walk but i have to go to school everyday and i just dont know what to do or who to talk to about it and i dont want to tell my roomate because im scared she is going to be grossed out by it and im not comfortable with her knowing yet. im miserable and im freaking out , someone help me :(

First of all, there is no way to know who gave this virus to whom. Do not blame yourself. Simply ask him if he has ever been tested for STD's, (AIDS, Herpes, Etc.) Also, even if he was tested, and came back negative, that will not prove much, as his girlfriend/wife, in the past relationship could have contracted it...

So basically, don't blame yourself. He definately needs to be tested and he definately needs to know that you are positive, so that you guys can practice safer sex.

Remember that 80% of americans have this virus, so your roommate could very well have it..........It is one of those things that some never know because they have never been tested for the fact that they have had no reason (sores, lesions, etc.)

It would help alot to GOOGLE the HSV and read the valuable information out there, as there is TONS of info. that will really help you to understand and ways you can talk to others about this virus.

Good luck :)

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Butterfly of the Moment

You have no reason to disclose this information to anyone you don't trust and aren't comfortable with. As for your boyfriend, let him know you are having painful symptoms around your vagina and that you are going to a doctor to get a diagnosis...ask him to come with you. Go to a doctor today or tomorrow asap and get tested (swab test and a blood test). If he loves you he will support you. It is scary information to digest but he won't run if he's mature and cares. 40-60% of people who have herpes do not get symptoms so it's possible he had it as well. In fact he should get tested with you. Good Luck!

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gotitsowhat

You don't have to have a lot of sex partners

to get herpes. All you have to have is bad luck. Lots of people have herpes and do not know it because they have no symptoms or their symptoms are very mild.

It does sound like you are having a classic first herpes outbreak--but the only way to resolve this and know for sure is to see a doctor. DO THIS RIGHT AWAY, DON'T WAIT! You need to have the swab test right now while the outbreak is fresh, otherwise the test will not be accurate. Also, if you get a blood test, it will have to be done at least 3 months from now to be accurate. If you get a blood test now, it might show negative because you do not have enough antibodies yet for the test to be accurate. But the swab test can be done, and should be done RIGHT NOW. Go to Planned Parenthood and ask for a herpes swab test. They are very tactful about this and will know just what to do to make you as comfortable as possible although the swab test does sting, sometimes a little, sometimes a lot.

Believe it or not, you will feel much better when you see a doctor and find out for sure one way or the other. Uncertainty is more stressful than knowing will be, no matter what. When you get medical help, they can give you something for the pain. Meanwhile, drink plenty of water so that your urine will not build up acid and sting a lot. You might have to pour a pitcher or water over the area while urinating. It helps to lean far forward on the toilet, too, so that the stream doesn't sting the sores. Some people have urinated in the shower or in the bathtub and that works well sometimes.

Baths with epsom salts may help as well. Then dry off and keep the sore area as dry as possible. Some people have even used a hair drier on the cool setting.

Do not tell anyone about this until you are completely comfortable about it and have thought about it and decided to trust someone with this very personal information. You only need people to know if you trust them and if you feel completely OK about telling them. Generally, if you tell one person in your crowd, you can expect other people are likely to find out. Don't think of this as a "secret"; it's just private medical information. It is considered normal for adults to keep their medical information private. You do not owe disclosure to anyone unless you are going to have sex with them.

Lots and lots of people have various forms of the herpes virus. I have lived with hsv2GH for 15 years now. It no longer bothers me. I have an outbreak one or twice a year and I don't even think I'd have that many if I did not work on a very stressful job. Like everyone else here, I am nervous about the prospect of having to explain this to a significant other...but it is really just a very small glitch in one's love life. A herpes diagnosis is life altering but not in a tragic, terrible way; it's just a matter of making a few adjustments in your thinking and lifestyle. I wish I did not have this but I have learned to live with it and it's really not that bad.

Don't panic. Just go immediately to PP or a doctor or STD clinic and get this clarified and taken care of. You will start to feel better, physically and psychologically, very soon so just hang in there. And please do not hesitate to PM me or email me if you need to vent or need some support. Everyone here understands how scary this is at first. And we all know that it gets better. Just do what needs to be done for now. It's going to be OK.

The old time Quakers had a saying for people who were going through shockingly hard times or overwhelming troubles: "Do ye now next thing." For you, the next thing would be a medical evaluation ASAP.

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starryeyed

You will get better!

Its completely normal to be very scared and think that nobody will understand your situation. But it will get better! My first outbreak was HORRIBLE! And now I barely get them at all. So don't stress that only makes it worse. Just know that many people have gone through what you are going through and gotten through it. It is only a silly virus there are much worse things that could happen. You should talk to somebody or just post on here to let out you frustrations. And go to the doctor if you haven't already, and tell you boyfriend in as calm of a manner as you can. People tend to react how you react so if you freak out they might freak out too. But he probably has it too. And it's none of your friends business they are not having sex with you so don't tell them if you don't feel like it! Now get some tea tree oil, dab it on and buy some lysine vitamins from whole foods or gnc or a vitamin store. Hope this helps.:)

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Groovaroova

Dont worry

Hi,

After waiting two weeks for test results, I have just been diagnosed with HSV2 yesterday. It killed me, plus I found out by text message from the hospital right in the middle of a meeting at work. -thanks!

I was devastated the whole day yesterday. I have been having unprotected sex with two partners for a few weeks now, one of whom is a married man.

My biggest fear yesterday was that I have given them the virus as well, especially since I had sex when (I think) I had an active sore.

I did the right thing and a few hours after finding out I told both partners. I was in tears and felt disgusting, diseased, and like a dirty whore.

Thankfully both partners took it really well and agreed that it is just an unfortunate development in what happens in life. They both reassured me they would get tested and neither of them was angry or felt any form of aprehension to sleeping with me again.

Of course the biggest lesson I learnt out of this is the lesson of "safe sex"-which, even after an abortion, I didnt seem to take very seriously until now.

I am currently going through my first "breakout". Its painful, uncomfortable and itchy, I felt like I had the flu for two days, and I feel a bit more tired than usual.

They are all right. My one day of horror has been replaced with reassurance that I am still me, I can still be as sexually active as before. No one thinks I am disgusting and, at the end of the day, it is just like having a coldsore-just down under. You wouldnt kiss your partner with a coldsore, just as you wouldnt have sex during a "shedding". We just all have to be careful, not let it get us down and get on with lie as normal.

There are people out there with much worse diseases, we just have to be responsible with ours and do as much as possible in preventing rom spreading it. All of my friends who I have told, have reassured me that it isn't that big of a deal, it happens to a lot of people and, at the end of the day, it could have been much worse.

Anyone out there who feels really down about this-please dont. Its not the end of the world. I figured that out, and although still gutted about the whole thing, I will not let this rule my life.

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ToeTappin

Mia, I’m going through the same thing you are, just a week or so later. It does hurt to walk, or sit, or stand and when you find that one semi comfortable spot you don’t want to move. Mine is sitting in a lounge chair slightly back. Unfortunately I am a musician so most of my time a day is spent sitting uncomfortably and fortunately I have a comfy recliner to sleep in.

Please let me know how everything went. I am scared too, and I haven’t; been to the doctor yet. And I’m dying to tell someone but I feel so dirty even though I know most people have it, I feel like I have a scarlet ‘STD’ sewn on my clothes.

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twinkletoes8809

i know exactally what you mean i was dating a guy when i found out i had it. i was scared i didnt know what it was i thought maybe i had a bad reaction from chlorine in a pool when i got my first symptoms but they werent going away so i went to the local health department. and telling your significant other is very difficult but as it was said above, it is something they have to be mature about. if he loves you he will understand and you can just take precautions. the guy i was dating freaked at first and then he got information on it and was more comfortable. you just have to make adjustments when you find out you have it. i have known for just a year and i am still scared to tell people about it. the only people who know are close to me.

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