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BeautifullyBroken

i'm so scared...

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BeautifullyBroken

i just began my first year in college. this is supposed to be the best time of my life and now i think i have this horrible burden to deal with. i understand that it isn't as bad as i think but i could really use some encouragement. so this is what happened.

a little over three months ago i went to the doctor and got tested for the "normal" std's. i had just switched razors so i wasn't too shocked to see a few little bumps show up... the only problem was that they stayed there. so i felt like shit about myself but decided to not think about it and just go on with my life. me and some of my friends went to the club one night and i saw one of my older guy friends there. we started getting really cozy and he offered to take me home. wrong. he took me to his house so i could "sober up" before going home. he was a friend so i trusted him. we layed in bed and watched a movie and then he started getting frisky and i told him i didn't want to do anything. he didn't really care and just figured i was drunk. i started crying becuase i had just gotten tested and i didn't want to deal with the horrible feelings you have after meaningless sex. so the next week i started getting really nervous after hearing about how much of a **** this guy was from my other friends and went back to the doctor. i started crying and telling her about the "bumps" and the sex and basically my whole life story (she was really scared. i was freaking the hell out) and she took a look. she said there was no way that those little bumps could be herpes. so she comforted me and gave me so really generic facts about herpes (giant blisters. won't be able to sit down. you know, all that bullshit that doctors say) and then sent me on my way. i was so relieved! but then... they didn't go away. they were still there and recently two more have showed up. so i started doing more research and freaking out a lot. i had a lot of the symptoms but things just didn't add up. they still don't. i'm too afraid to go get tested. so i guess i just have some questions. is it normal to have an outbreak for like 3 months? could this be something else?

i really love this site. you all seem so wonderful and any help you could offer would be appreciated.

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sweetheart87

Honestly...I don't think you can have a ob for 3 months. If you are really scared you can go get tested...i know that is nerve racking..but I'm sure your doctor is right. These seem like small bumps..I remember when I first had an ob...i had small bumps..whiched turned into huge ass blisters. I was soo swollen down there i couldn't tell I was a girl. It hurt to walk...and you feel really weak. You usually get the "flu" like systoms...aches, pains, want to sleep a fever. I remember my fever was 103. I had that kind of a fever for 3 days and that was before I decided to go to the doctor. If you have been reading up on herpes..thats good cause then you will know what to look for. But honestly you should go to the doctor and get the test...you have to ask for the herpes test though. I hope you figure everything out...good luck!

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lyssa

you should get it looked at again at least for ur own peace of mind u could be torturing yourself for nothing, or it could be some thing else, something curable. its best to know for sure. good luck i hope you end up not having herpes.

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gotitsowhat

Uncertainty is the worst

If you do not see a doctor and get tested, you will go on feeling as you do and will worry about it. If you do have herpes, it is better to be able to get some meds and ease the pain. A blood test is accurate at least 3 months from exposure so you might want to get another test in 3 months. You need to go right away if you want to get a swab test because the swab test is only accurate at the height of the outbreak. Try an STD clinic or Planned Parenthood. It might turn out that you don't have herpes and that would be a big relief for you. But if you do, you can learn to manage it and you can get some meds to help clear up the outbreak, and maybe some lidocaine to ease the pain of the outbreak. And certainty is always easier to deal with than uncertainty.

As for the doctor, she could just be ignorant, because MOST people who have herpes do not have symptoms or have very mild symptoms. That is why so many people have it and so many people pass it on unknowingly. There is a wide variety of symptoms experienced by herpes infected people, ranging from horrendously painful to painful to barely noticeable to nothing at all.

You might want to read my post Doctor Dictionary (you'll have to search for it under Personal Experiences) which explains that doctors do not always diagnose herpes when they suspect it.

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