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smithconfused

H is interrupting my relationship/sex life.

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smithconfused

Im GH + with symptoms, but my fiance has never had an OB or symptoms. He has yet to get tested. He figures its not a big deal because we are going to get married next year never-the-less. Before I got diagnosed and started to have symptoms, we enjoyed a healthy and fun sex life. But now, Im always having OBs and feel so ugly, dirty and depressed for sex.

I need some advice to overcome this. He is really understanding but I think I am depriving him of something special in our relationship SEX. Also, if he tests negative, I really dont want to pass this nasty virus to him.

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Butterfly of the Moment

It's great your man is understanding but eventually he may get worn out. If he's accepted having the virus already and is ready to move on there's nothing left for you to do except follow suit. I think the stress may be triggering more outbreaks for you. Take some vitamins and perhaps get on suppressive medication for a couple months until you have come to a better place mentally where you accept having the virus. It's really hard, but take comfort you are getting married to someone who loves you and wants to be with you and doesn't care whether or not you have herpes...you're worth the risk. Have him get tested...since you are getting married and all there's no use in using protection for reasons other than pregnancy if he already has the virus. If not, female to male transmission is 4% a year if you don't have sex during outbreaks. If you use a condom that reduces to about 2-3% a year, and if you are taking a suppressive medicine and use condoms that is like a 1% risk. Talk to your fiancee.

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