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slimjim26

My Rant!!

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slimjim26

Long story short!! Married a beautiful sweet girl. Meet in church, both had hearts for the Lord (or a least I thought she did). We dated for awhile(over a year), had amazing fun times! She seemed to really know what she wanted out of life(rare for a female nowadays). Talked about marriage but I was hesitant bc I wanted to make sure it would last forever! Treated her with respect, made her feel loved and appreciated (I even called her beautiful as a nickname!). We are both Military so we got separated for 8 months (Needs of the military). Everything was going good(besides some small fusses). One night she decides that she would lie to me bc she wanted to get drunk. There is only one catch, it was with people she didnt know, and no girlfriends to look out for her. Well she ended up sleeping with some dude in the bathroom floor!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS THE SWEET GIRL!!!! Her guilt gets the best of her so she tells me a month till we are to be stationed together! She cheated and doesnt want to be married anymore!! TEARS MY FREAKIN HEART OUT!!!! Three months later(prob from stress), My new friend pops up! Now I know why she wanted a divorce, bc H was her friend before it was my friend. So here I am!! This sucks!! Life goes on!!

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Jewel

Sorry Slimjim26. You guys can't work things out? or you guys don't want to work things out? Does this thing have to break you guys up? Just seems sad to me. Sorry again. But you are right Life does go on.

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slimjim26

She didn't want to work it out

She was set in her ways of divorce(an emotional decision that she now regrets, but it is too late). She had it in her mind that divorce = freedom. She saw all the single girls having fun and thats what she wanted. Its sad that now she see's different but thats her lesson that she has to learn! :( Grass is almost never greener!

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Jewel

Some people have to learn the hard way. I think she's going to find out the hardway. Nothing you can do about that. Sorry.

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listentometalk

I'm a little confused. She got Herpes from the guy on the bathroom floor, and then gave it to you afterwards? Or she had it beforehand, and didn't tell you? Or did she not know? If she didn't explicitly state this, you have no idea that that's the reason she wanted a divorce. In fact, that's probably highly unlikely, given the fact that if she knew beforehand, she wouldn't have invested in it to begin with.

And not to be a prick here, but her being infected with Herpes doesn't mean she's a heathen, God-hating whore. I'm not sure if that's what you were nodding toward, but it sort of sounded like it when you said "I thought she loved the Lord".

But in all honesty, if she still loves you, and you still love her, I'd try to find a way to look past it and move on. Marriage isn't perfect, shit happens. It's a cold, lonely world out there for a guy with Herpes, and it's hard to find anything at all, let alone true love.

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Canadian Daisy

Sounds like in the beginning she liked the 'idea' of being married. In my opinion anyone that is willing to cheat or even thinking about it has no business being married! I am so sorry you have been hurt the way you have by her.

Life will get better and you'll meet someone that is perfect for you! It took a long time for me to find my soul mate but finally I did and I'm happy to say we are happily married with kids now.

Again I'm very sorry about what happened and I hope in time you will be able to trust someone else with your heart. Take care

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slimjim26

Thank you everyone for reading my rant! Sometimes you just have to get it out! LOL And Listentometalk, I was not implying that she was a "heathen, God-hating whore". Its not my job to judge. Our marriage had a soilid foundation with Christ in my mind, obviously not hers. She made a concious choice (Her and only her) to sleep with another man. I was willing to work past this but she didnt want to be married. So the promises to me and to God meant nothing to her. As for the H, I dont know if she had it before we were together or contracted it thru adultry. It doesnt matter at this point. Its sad that she became so selfish and full of pride that she couldnt see what she had right in front of her. And I totally agree that it is a lonely world, and im not sure true love really exists (except for Gods), espcially with H!! Thats why I have started many projects! LOL

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Jewel

Slimjim, you sound like a great guy. Just wish you the best. Keep on moving and doing. This is a great place to vent, anytime.

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gotitsowhat

Heartbreak & herpes--a lousy conbination!

It sounds like you've been through the ringer, slimjim. Sometimes people don't realize that marriage is for mature adults, not adolescents. Maybe she was just too young to be married--it sure sounds like it.

Heartbreak and herpes often seem to go together. I know that pain because I got herpes from a guy I'd been with for ten years who knew he had it but did not tell me. I found out I had herpes around the same time he died (of lung cancer) and at the same time I found out about his other women, and even that he had married one of them two days before he passed away. To say it was devastating is an understatement.

Hang in there. You sound like a great guy for the right woman. And, herpes or not, I am sure you will find her, when the time is right.

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slimjim26

Not so bad

WOW! Brainy!! I know what I am going through is difficult but can only imagine the pain you felt. Thats a very intense and emotional situation that helps me to see my situation as "not so bad". Through this chaos God has something planned for all of us. What that is we will only know when we are able to look back and see the big picture :)

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