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Doc says I have herpes...I have my doubts.


dnice21

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So last Friday I trimmed the hair around my pubic region...at the base of my penis, around the pubic hair, etc. That same night I had unprotected sex with a new girl.

About 2 days later some rather large bumps appeared on the areas I had shaved. Actually...just about every hair follicle had a bump. This was on the areas of my lower abdomen above the pubic hair, at the base of my penis, and on my scrotum. It didn't look like pimples...more like just raised skin where the hair was growing back out. It was a rather close shave, and I went against the grain with a used razor blade...so I assumed it was just a bad case of ingrown hairs and let it be.

As the week progressed, it started getting worse. The new hairs growing in irritated the bumps, along with the friction, and they became very sore. The pain grew worse, and they started forming white heads, and some became blisters filled with pus.

For the past week I've assumed it was folliculitus. At first, it looked like the bumps were popping up just around the hair follicles. But today, i've noticed some of the blisters weren't on a follicle. There are really too many too count and are all over my pubic region and inner thigh. 99.9% don't seem to stretch past the first inch of the penis where I had shaved some stray hairs, however i've noticed two small lesions forming today towards the top on the underside.

I went to the doc today and she said it looked like herpes. She took a culture and I'm waiting on the results. In the mean time, she put me on Valtrax. I can't say I was shocked at this finding, but I do have my doubts.

Most have a tiny hole at the top where it looks like a hair burst through. The white pus in some of them drains when I take a shower. Is this symptomatic of a herpes lesion?

The only blisters that I can really feel & hurt are the ones right around my penis that are getting irritated by friction & other hairs. The blisters on my abdomen don't hurt at all.

Skin infection or Herpes? What do you think? I've been depressed all day and its all I can think about. Feels like my life as I know it is coming to an end if this is true.

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Hi dnice,

Sorry you are dealing with this, whatever it is. Based on your description of the circumstances and symptoms, I'd be inclined to think the same thing you did.

But the problem is, nobody here can possibly determine what you have that way.

In fact, your doctor can't give you a definitive diagnosis based on her visual exam, either. She can give you her suspicions, but not a 100% diagnosis. The CDC recommends that visual exam always be confirmed by way of actual laboratory tests, so I'm glad to read that your doc did those, because even "experts" can make mistakes visually. It is a notoriously unreliable means of diagnosing the tricky little herpes virus.

If she didn't mention about having the cultures "typed" for HSV1 versus HSV2, you might want to call your doc and request that. It can be useful to know which type you have (if you have herpes).

I know it's hard waiting for results, but really that's all you can do. Just be glad your doc had the sense to take the swabs. Otherwise, you would still be wondering...perhaps forever.

Hang in there...the results will be in soon. In the meantime, this web site is a very good resource for learning all about the realities of herpes. Take advantage of it by reading the links on the right side of the page. It should help you realize that herpes need not be the end of life as you know it. It just requires that a person tap the brakes a little bit, not come to a full stop.

:wavey:

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I think everyone feels like crawling in a hole with a year's worth of provisions when this happens. This is new for me and ironically, I had just gone through months of soul searching after my last failed relationship and had fully looked forward to just a life with myself ANYWAY. I had stopped wanting a partner because I have been deceived and manipulated by so many men that I had just lost all faith. Then this.

I went to a concert with a very supportive friend and I looked around feeling like I didn't even want to make eye contact with anybody. This is horrible when you are normally a social creature.

How do y'all lighten up on the psychological and emotional self-pressures?

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I went to a concert with a very supportive friend and I looked around feeling like I didn't even want to make eye contact with anybody. This is horrible when you are normally a social creature.

How do y'all lighten up on the psychological and emotional self-pressures?

Next time you are out and about around other people, look at all those other people and start counting them off to yourself: "1 - 2 - 3 - herpes, 1 - 2 - 3 - herpes." About 1 in 4 or 5 people have genital herpes. If you include oral herpes, the numbers are much higher --- about 8 out of 10!

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dnice- please keep us informed. the waiting is a torture in an of itself. we all know how you feel and are here for you.

fattypatty- crawling into a hole sounds good to me. i am also in a deep depression about this. i wish i wasn't. i can talk to myself about all of it logically and can come to the conclusion that this is not the worst thing, but logic goes out the window and i am back to feeling badly. this site has helped me a lot-not just in emotional support, but in learning about herpes. the folks here know more than your doctor! we are all here for you.

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loula- i looked for you on chat earlier, but you were gone. if there is a certain tie you will be here, let me know and i will be sure to be at the computer and ready to chat!

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All I can think about is not being able to get a girlfriend because of this. I'm in college, and as it is, 90% of my sexual relationships consist of one night stands...not necessarily by choice either. The rest usually don't last more than 2 or 3 hookups. I spit great game, and always shoot for girls out of my league, so when it comes to finding a girl who is actually interested in being with me, its proven nearly impossible thus far. I guess I had this coming to me.

The times when I find a girl I could even consider asking out are already so infrequent...now on top of that, Id have to tell her I've got herpes. This feels like I just killed any chances of finding a girlfriend in one drunken night. I'm so pissed at this girl who gave it to me. She told me not to wear a condom...I asked her if she had anything I should worry about. This suckss

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dnice, you absolutley did not "have this coming." Unless you are an axe murderer or something of that nature, you do not deserve this. I wish i could take this disease, or at least its stigma away for all who deal with it. I think you sound like you are having some revelations about what you want. You want a lasting, caring relationship. Would you consider joining a local "dating with herpes" group? By doing this you may meet someone who shares the same feelings and condition. Also, by joining, you are showing the women in the group that you are being upfront with all of this and that by itself is commendable as you are showing honesty.I know this is all horrible right now, but I think you are on the brink of setting yourself on a good path with the things you want. I can tell you right now there are many, many wonderful young women in the same position as you and thinking she will never meet a man that will accept her as is. As well- there are many women who may not have herpes who are ok with it, but if getting you into the dating scene would be easier by joining a herpes dating thing, you might build up your confidence quicker and who knows...maybe meet someone amazing. Google around and see if you can find a group. You are not alone and will not spend your life alone.

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No offense, but I can't see myself ever joining a "herpes dating group" or looking for someone on one of those std dating sites. It is not the sort of thing I want to be the first thing I have in common when meeting a new girl. Even if I did...where would it even progress too? Everybody would ask "so, how did you two meet"...then what would we say, "oh, we met through a herpes group". Sure we could lie...but it'd always be in the back of our minds.

Joining one of those groups would just help let it define my life...which I don't plan on. This forum is probably going to be the only time I ever talk about it. Honestly if this diagnosis does come back positive, I am going to try to live my life completely the same as it was.

The thing I worry about is that I know i'm morally obligated to tell a sexual partner that I have it, however when the time comes down to it, if I'm in some passionate moment with an attractive girl, i'm not sure I'd be able to bring myself to tell her. Sure I'd always use a condom from now on and be more careful.... but I don't know if my moral obligation to tell her would overcome my sex drive. Especially if I'm drunk or something. If I told her, I know theres a good chance she would end up telling all of her girl friends, which would inevitably spread around the whole school, and I would definitely have no chance of ever finding another girl in college again.

I can't even bring myself to say something to the girl who gave it to me. It turns out she had a boyfriend when we had sex that she never mentioned. If I said something to her, I wouldn't want her saying something to him, because I know it would spread.

It makes me wonder ...I've slept with a lot of girls in my life....how many of them knew they had it and didn't say anything? How many have it and don't know?

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I think it's good that you don't intend to let herpes define your life, and I agree about the dating groups.

However, when it comes to disclosure, I think that is one place where you ought to modify (slightly) the way you live your life. You ask how you could tell in a passionate moment.

Well, here's the thing...it's time to tap the brakes a bit and slow down. Get to know a girl a bit, so you can determine if she is worth your trust, before you find yourself in a clinch with her. If you see that things are moving towards intimacy, THAT is the time to tell --- not when clothes are already hitting the floor.

It seems to me that you should be more concerned that a girl might get herpes from you and then tell, rather than her telling if you were honest enough to disclose and give her a choice.

Telling at a calm time allows your potential partners to make a rational, informed decision. It gives them time to educate themselves about herpes and learn that the stigma is not the truth.

That's how my guy approached it, and it worked out just fine.

Many other folks here have stories of how they told and their potential partners were accepting.

Oh, yes, others have less happy stories. But remember, we all get rejected in life. Herpes is not the only reason for that by a long shot.

"The right time to tell is any time before getting intimate."

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Diagnosis came in today... doc says I have GHSV-1. Lame. Least I was prepared for it...unless it just hasn't sunk in yet.

I don't know why that would be "lame." It is just one of the four possibilities. And you are right, HSV2 would probably cause more outbreaks.

Anyway, you will likely ride the roller coaster of emotions for a while. But I am sure that the fact you have researched a bit of what to expect is going to help you.

Hang in there and let us know how things are going, okay?

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Without lesions, it is highly questionable that the ailment is related to herpes, yet testing is useful if you have concerns as you have done so.] About a month after that [herpes causes issues within days, if the first 'symptoms' are a month later - its extremely unlikely they are related to herpes], significant discomfort downstairs, however every test I have ever taken for HSV 1 and 2 has been negative. Here are the details: Face: Previously, some significant tingling and itching on the right side of my mouth, lips and chin (still there, but milder) [herpes does not cause general tingling and itching, it can cause a reasonably concentrated feeling of itch/throb from which a herpes lesion appears within hours]. Occasional hot flashes near my right eye, cheek and ear [herpes does not do this, it may be a immune response to something, or stress]. Sometimes it will feel like the skin is crawling on the right side of my face [herpes does not cause a general crawling sensation]. 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