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G'day all


germy

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My reason for signing up is that my partner says I pass on cold sores when we kiss. So now, no kissy. Havn't had simplex but have had shingles, twice. Is there anything I can do!!:madd:

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This is a somewhat confusing post. :rolleyes:

I'm not sure what your partner means. Is it that you have transmitted oral herpes to him or her?

Is your partner getting sores on the mouth since being with you? If so, has your partner been tested to be sure those sores are being caused by oral herpes?

Even if you have not ever had a cold sore that you remember, it is possible that you have (asymptomatic) oral herpes. About 70% of those who have oral herpes don't know it because they don't get recognizable symptoms.

Have you had a type specific blood test to determine whether or not you have either HSV1 or HSV2 antibodies?

At this point, if you both have oral herpes, kissing can't cause either of you to have it "more."

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Sorry

Didn't mean to confuse. I'm getting the blame for every cold sore she gets." You're the carrier" is what is said, no haven't had the blood test keep forgetting but will make a point of it. The chance of her having a test is 0. Personally I think its because she gets terribly run down. Unfortunately my opinion or advice don't count for much. Thanks for the help. Cheers

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Once a person has HSV, there is the possibility of future outbreaks. Even if nobody ever kissed her again, that could happen.

So don't let the blame game get you down. It is not even a little bit fair to you! You are not the only so-called "carrier." If she is getting cold sores, she carries the virus as well. She clearly has no understanding of how herpes works.

My question is, do you understand it? I suggest you read the links on the right side of this page to educate yourself about HSV.

It may or may not be that she originally got OHSV from you, but in any case, you guys kissing once she has it does not matter. If she is getting true cold sores, then she has herpes. And it can reactivate and cause sores at any time. You are right that "getting run down" can be a trigger. So can other things.

You need to get her to try to learn more about herpes. If she won't listen to you and isn't willing to open up to that, your problems are much worse than HSV. Lack of understanding and open communication in a relationship is far more serious than a stupid virus that causes an occasional sore. :madd:

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Nice

Thanks for that,no I don't understand what herpes is all about but will educate myself. Yeh you're right about the other stuff too. I have other more serious medical stuff going on without the patronizing "kiss on the head" as she goes out the door. Im 54 not 4. I haven't spoken to anyone about this so this site is a good way for me to vent a bit & educate myself a lot. Thank you once again. :itsme:

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Like I said, those links on the right are chock-full of good information. Avail yourself of those, but also be sure to ask direct questions about the nature of herpes, etc.

Don't feel bad. Folks our age didn't get any info about herpes back in sex ed. It was all "VD," which just meant syphilis and gonorrhea. They didn't even consider herpes worth mentioning.

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Just to let you know --- about 80% of the North American population has oral herpes. Most of them got it prior to adulthood, usually from casual (non-sexual) contact such as a kiss on the cheek from their old auntie or sharing a saliva-covered toy with another child.

The thing is, about 70% of those folks do not realize they have herpes, because they do not show recognizable symptoms. Also, oral sores often dodges the stigma while genital sores take the bad rap.

NONSENSE! They are both caused by herpes simplex. Here's an article with good info about the differences and similarities:

Good Virus/Bad Virus

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      Hey @WilsoInAus ok thank you, I will do my best to move on and stop trawling forums haha. 
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      Hey @sgt98 but there is no feasible infection or outbreak to suppress and antivirals do not suppress an initial outbreak in any event 
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