Reflecting back on a scare back in September, can anyone put my mind at ease?

[dirk13]

I felt coming to a forum of educated people who know a lot about HSV and also have it, they will be all too familiar with the illness and what is, and of course, what is not it.

I have been told that if one gets herpes and it manifests itself, one would KNOW, no ifs ands or buts about it.

Well, anyway, I had an incident back in September that I am still not 100% sure about, and I was hoping maybe a few smart users on here could help possibly clear it up for me. I imagine the cumulative knowledge and experience in this forum would likely be a good place for me to bounce my story off of and see if anyone can confirm or deny anything.

Back in September I had sex with a few new partners in a single week (not a common occurrence, but in this case it happened), one in particular I was quite suspicious about afterward as far as her level of sexual cleanliness was a bit questionable (condomless sex with a partner, mention of having unsafe sex with multiple partners after she saw me with little regard for exclusivity in that regard or strict safety measures). Mind you my sex with both of these people was protected, but after reading up on HSV more, I'm not sure if that does nearly anything to protect oneself from infection like it would for other STD's, even HIV. Anyway though, I just wanted to paint a picture of my state of mind leading into the situation, to fast forward a bit I contacted her as well as the other partner and they both said they were tested either the week of seeing me or in the aforementioned girls case, both before and after seeing me and were clean.

But anyway, back to the present. I awoke a few days after the second partner (actually part of me remembers feeling a bit off even before and possibly right after the 2nd) with some red dots on the upper right part of my pelvic reason (near pant waist area). I actually recall a day or two earlier them being pimples (or what I thought were pimples) and popping them and clearing them as I usually would. These dots looked a bit more red and pronounced than the usual foliculitis, and the pattern seemed a bit more clustered than usual, making me a little uncomfortable. Then, following a stiff neck I had from a few days earlier, I then had an achey lower back (not sure how low or if it was in the right spot for it to be the back pain associated with the outbreak symptom) which then led to the flu....OR "flu-like symptoms". It was September mind you, just the beggining of flu season, I even remember there being a commercial on the radio about getting ready to come in soon for flu shots.

So for about 5 days or so I am sick with a high fever (around 101-103), nausia and other pains associated with the the typical flu. I am not sure if there is any discernable difference between a flu and herpes related "flu like symptoms" but I definitely had one of them.

So, while I was sick I looked up online the typical initial herpes outbreak symptoms and grew concerned (yes, I know, my first mistake, while this did sound fishy, it's possible the internet caused me to see more of a pattern present then there was). So I went into the doctor and had him look at my rash once I was feeling better.

He said it was "probably" nothing, however, much to my concern, he was "inspired" enough by it to not only swab for HSV2, but also shingles. I wasnt concerned I had shingles, just that my rash looked suspicious enough to inspire him to test for something extra.

Anyway, the swab came back negative. He rubbed good and hard, even re irritating the bumps and making them bleed a little, but I don't really know if I had come in in time or not, so that did not end up giving me a perfect piece of mind.

Oh, and also the red dots in question did not tingle, burn or hurt or itch (not beyond a little expected irritation from irritated skin being on the pant line like that, I naturally noticed it a little but the feeling was extremely muted and nothing that would have concerned me otherwise).

So basically this is my dillema, my rash had none of the feeling related symptoms to herpes, and my swab test came back negative. However, the symptoms seemed rather coincidentally ill timed (a flu and a weird rash right around the same time...even though it WAS flu season). It also has been 4-5 months since this happened and I have had nothing that looks like a recurrence, which is a good sign considering I read in the first year one would have on average 4 recurrences, making me feel all the more I was likely fine. I could get an Igg test at this point, but I would rather just put the incident behind me since I did get it tested at the time, or at the very least try and convince myself more that this at least was not a herpes outbreak. Even if I do eventually take an Igg test and it yields otherwise, I will still not know for sure if this was for sure an infection or not, and that is bothering me greatly right now.

So basically, I put it to the forum, is it likely this could still have been a herpes out break? Or would you say, no way? Basically I am a bit of a worryer, and have even experienced many of the physcological symptoms that comes with actually being positively diagnoses due to my "scare" (fear that my current partner, who I very much love will leave me....but who also saw the rash when I had it and, for a careful person, didn't think it was anything to be concerned about), and it is hard for me to move on until I get get a second opinion...or ten .

Oh, and the most important part, I also took pictures! Due to the location of the rash, my genitals are not featured in them (just in case anyone was wondering before they clicked on the links) but rather the upper left part of my pelvis near the belt line. I am not sure if this is ok to post, but I think a little visual identification could go a little further towards any experienced HSV carriers being able to pitch in their 2 cents.

http://img823.imageshack.us/img823/4176/384z.jpg

http://img151.imageshack.us/img151/9046/385s.jpg

http://img233.imageshack.us/img233/6034/386h.jpg

http://img602.imageshack.us/img602/8025/387h.jpg

http://img151.imageshack.us/img151/2730/388hn.jpg

excuse the shoddy photography, I took them on my phone.

[RealisticGal]

I have been told that if one gets herpes and it manifests itself, one would KNOW, no ifs ands or buts about it.

All of the research I have done has led me to believe that the opposite is true when it comes to herpes simplex. Herpes is a chameleon that can resemble other conditions and vice versa. The presentation can vary wildly from one person to another. Further, it can hide out and show such minimal symptoms as to go unnoticed/unrecognized.

So basically this is my dillema, my rash had none of the feeling related symptoms to herpes, and my swab test came back negative. However, the symptoms seemed rather coincidentally ill timed (a flu and a weird rash right around the same time...even though it WAS flu season). It also has been 4-5 months since this happened and I have had nothing that looks like a recurrence, which is a good sign considering I read in the first year one would have on average 4 recurrences, making me feel all the more I was likely fine. I could get an Igg test at this point, but I would rather just put the incident behind me since I did get it tested at the time, or at the very least try and convince myself more that this at least was not a herpes outbreak. Even if I do eventually take an Igg test and it yields otherwise, I will still not know for sure if this was for sure an infection or not, and that is bothering me greatly right now.

Some of your description could make a case for possible herpes, but as previously noted, it is a real sneaky little bastard of a virus that is not at all clear in presentation.

So I ask you this...what did you mean when you said, "Even if I do eventually take an Igg test and it yields otherwise, I will still not know for sure if this was for sure an infection or not?"

The reason I don't understand that comment is because, if you do test positive via an accurate IgG-based type specific test, then you will have a good idea whether or not you are infected with HSV. And if you have been tested clear in the past, but now have a positive result, there would be a good chance that the events of September had something to do with your changed status.

So basically, I put it to the forum, is it likely this could still have been a herpes out break? Or would you say, no way? Basically I am a bit of a worryer, and have even experienced many of the physcological symptoms that comes with actually being positively diagnoses due to my "scare" (fear that my current partner, who I very much love will leave me....but who also saw the rash when I had it and, for a careful person, didn't think it was anything to be concerned about), and it is hard for me to move on until I get get a second opinion...or ten .

No way would I say "no way."

About 20% of swab/cultures come back with false negatives. Some of your symptoms, as well as your history, make it a possibility. If it were me, I would just go get a type specific IgG-based blood test and be done with it. As a worrier, it may be what you need to get that peace of mind.

[dirk13]

What I mean is yes, an Igg test would tell me if I have herpes now and contracted it at some point (which would be a very unpleasant surprise at this point after being honest with my partner about the rash, even showing it to her and her not being worried, especially after I told her my swab test was negative), but I dont think it would necessarily be clear still if that was herpes or not. I know what you're saying, it would technically fill in the gaps, but right now, because I did get a test when I had symptoms and then I moved on, I just wish I could find some way to verify I was likely fine, I figured the pictures would help tip the scales one way or another (particularly with them not having the typical pain related symptoms). I even briefly brought up to her the idea that I may not feel like I'm still fine, but her knowing me, she told me to just stop freaking out about it.

I guess the issue is even my doctor had urged against it, I know that sounds irresponsible, but he knew that I was seemingly the only one pushing for it after my swab test came back negative (quite some time after in fact, for whatever reason I started to dwell on the incident again some time later). He felt that unless it came up again (and if it was indeed herpes it likely at some point would it seems) that I would be putting my self through a lot of undue stress only to find out I have something that was and will be otherwise dormant if it had not presented a symptomatic reason to be looked at again at some point. Yes, I know, that is hugely irresponsible and the resultant choice of resisting taking a test for now has only stressed me out to the point where I just feel like I have it anyway, even if not much points to that. I think the idea of waiting and seeing, while far more nerve wracking, would eventually avoid a psychological stigma far worse that is mildly irrelevant if I have gone this far without any recurrences after a primary outbreak.

I will say this though, if it was herpes, I had sex with someone DURING this supposed primary outbreak (again, I was freaking out, I was in the process of waiting for the swab test to come back, I showed it to the person before we did anything, and she even felt it was nothing to worry about) and she is still fine (my other concern of course is that she could have contracted it at this point).

There is another reason I am prefering to wait at least a few more months before I voluntarily get a blood test to put my own mind at ease, as the person I'm with is going through a scare of her own right now and has to wait for tests from an assault. I think it would be psycologically easier for her to handle one way or the other if it was afterward whether I'm fine or not or she's fine or not, and I of course wouldn't just get tested now to find out for myself and keep it a secret if it's bad news (as the second doctor I saw suggested). However, considering I am not otherwise suffering reocurring outbreaks and would immediately mention if I had any further strange rash issues, I think we've been together long enough since I began worrying about this again only quite a while after, that there is no further risk to her than there already is, and I of course have no intention (or well, ability to reconcile in my worrysome addled brain) to see other partners anymore.

I know this seems a wrong way to go about it, but even my own doctor, possibly due to the prevalance of herpes as a pretty common thing, and the lack of inclusion in a regular screening sees that if I was just not as much of a worry wart, I wouldn't have come back in to follow up, inquire about it more, or post on here. I would have just taken the negative swab test at face value, and put it behind me until or unless I had further issues as was recommended. I think he feels why push me into a test that would have otherwise not been medically recommended for me (clearly at the time I had symptoms the doctor felt a swab was all that was necessary, and that if I had a recurrence, to follow up, and if not, to just not worry so much about it as I have been).

I think that's why I all of the sudden started to worry, that while I'd rather hold off a little on the Igg until it becomes more of a pressing issue or some kind of further issue period worth looking into, I have been trying to just pick the brains of current HSV carriers just to see how suspicious my incident even was, especially with a negative test while symptoms were present (something it seems many doctors prefer). I mean let's put it another way, I don't know what the difference is between flu and flu-like, but I would be pretty surprised if that wasn't a flu, particularly with temps as high as they got (I am pretty sure I read somewhere that it would often be a milder fever if it was a reaction to something like herpes).

[RealisticGal]

Your doctor made some good points. He clearly knows your nature as a worrier, which obviously is a factor in this situation for you. The final thing is, you need to do what feels right for you. If waiting is the best thing, wait.

I'm sorry to hear about your girlfriend's assault. I hope that she is able to heal quickly.

Take care and do what you need to do. It sounds like you are extremely responsible and concerned, so I am sure you will do the right thing.