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G'day everyone, anyone in the mood for a rant?


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Ive been lurking for a little while and i decided that i should join this forum. Im 21, from Australia and got diagnosed with HSV1 about 4-5 months ago. My life has pretty much gone to hell because of it. I lost my virginity in February this year and i got it off that girl. Talk about bad luck 20 years old and I even wore a condom and i still got the one STD you cant get rid of. At least you can laugh about the clap and clamydia lol. The doctor told me i got it from oral sex most likely. No one ever tells ya you can get herpes from oral sex, the amount of mates i got who get bj's from girls and have never had an STD. Its not fair! Anyway I didnt have symptoms until about july and at the time i was a perfect relationship with a beautiful girl. My first real gf, it seemed my life was finally turning around getting good. But then i noticed some weird things going on, went to the docs, had a sample taken and sure enough it was herpes. I told my gf and she was very supportive, she didnt cut me away or even get angry at me and we still remained intimate for a while. But it went to rat shit when i found out she was allergic to condoms, or so she said. I started drinking alot and we started growing apart, i caught her dancing with another bloke in a club, called her a **** then left. Shes now engaged to another guy who shes madly in love with. I was going to let her go anyway just to protect her and i wish it ended differently between us but i was so scared angry and frustrated. Fuck I hate my life. So yeah thats my story.

Only she and the doctor know. I haven't been with anyone since and I'm honestly afraid I'll be alone forever. I was never very good at getting girls even without herpes and just as it seemed i was making progress this happens. It always seems to happen in my life.


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Welcome to the club. Sorry thing went badly with your ex. For future notice you can get different types of condoms because bc some are allergic to latex. Herpes normally comes as a bit of a HUGE shock for most and can take a while getting over it. Is shit being young eh...am 21...got a perfect bf and probably caught it years ago.

You can still have a normal relationship...your just an unlucky statistic but your herpes will fade with time...and if your careful you wont pass it on. It seems like a huge thing right now...but its all in your head! It gets better with time :)

Your not any different than before, you have caught something that is very common and manageable...and any girl will understand that, that is worth it...

Also hsv1 in the genitals doesnt normally recur as often as hsv2 and is harder to pass on... so there are positives to your story!

Chin up :) x

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Welcome to the site, Alpha. :) Like you, I have GHSV-1. I was also not aware you could get herpes from oral sex. Wish I was more educated on this prior to getting it. It's scary to think that so many people are not aware that a simple cold sore could be passed to someone genitally. Sorry to hear about your ex. Obviously, things were not meant to be! I'm sure you will meet someone one day who is perfect for you. Best of luck!

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    • sgt98
      Hey @WilsoInAus ok thank you, I will do my best to move on and stop trawling forums haha. 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @sgt98 but there is no feasible infection or outbreak to suppress and antivirals do not suppress an initial outbreak in any event 
    • sgt98
      Thanks @WilsoInAus I understand apologies for this but the only other thing I am worried about is that I did take a course of Famvir on day 1 as I felt like I was having an outbreak of cold sores and am worried that has suppressed the initial outbreak genitally 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @sgt98 it is not feasible to obtain a HSV-2 infection from receiving oral sex - only HSV-1 is feasible but you've already got that and immunity from any further infection with HSV-1. You do not need any further tests for HSV. You're feeling regret, try to forgive yourself and calm down, let the rational take over. You know the answer here and it won't be long until you believe it too.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @NerdP423 and welcome to the website. You raise a lot of points and I think the best way to address your concerns is add some comments at each key point. I've copied your note again below and added these comments in square brackets. I appreciate any insight (even speculation) as to what has been going on with me. I'm a 37y/o M. I last was intimate with a new partner on 2/11/2022, and a few days later started having a huge amount of discomfort in my face. [The first thing that happens though is that herpes causes lesions or at least some skin based disruption. Other symptoms are then related to the actions of the immune system responding to the virus. Without lesions, it is highly questionable that the ailment is related to herpes, yet testing is useful if you have concerns as you have done so.] About a month after that [herpes causes issues within days, if the first 'symptoms' are a month later - its extremely unlikely they are related to herpes], significant discomfort downstairs, however every test I have ever taken for HSV 1 and 2 has been negative. Here are the details: Face: Previously, some significant tingling and itching on the right side of my mouth, lips and chin (still there, but milder) [herpes does not cause general tingling and itching, it can cause a reasonably concentrated feeling of itch/throb from which a herpes lesion appears within hours]. Occasional hot flashes near my right eye, cheek and ear [herpes does not do this, it may be a immune response to something, or stress]. Sometimes it will feel like the skin is crawling on the right side of my face [herpes does not cause a general crawling sensation]. Never seen anything that looked like a traditional cold sore [that's extremely telling, even people with associated atypical symptoms will have experienced herpes lesions]. Occasionally, the left side of my face will have a momentary feeling of skin crawling, but it's so mild that I am not really worried about it. Downstairs: Thankfully, most of these are now milder than they were before. Occasional momentary pinch of pain at the base of my genitals. [herpes does not cause a general pinch feeling.] Aching pain in my boxer area (groin, leg folds) [nor this] Occasional feeling of cold in my boxer area, butt, or lower back. ( also in my shins and occasionally even my arms) [nor this] On 4/30/2022, I had been in discomfort for almost two months. I scratched an itch, noticed it hurt, and then checked - I did have an open ulcer down there. Took myself to the ER to get swabbed, came back negative. [If this was a PCR then this will be very conclusive.] Practitioner said it may come back negative because it was already open. However the lab report noted that it definitely didn't look like what you'd expect a typical first herpes outbreak to look like [how would the lab know??]. All blood tests negative so far. I had two western blots, the second one was nine months after exposure. [Two negative Westernblots!!! Many that's real convincing]. All other swabs also negative. I went to urgent care, because I know the timeliness of when the Swab is taken matters. One time, a swab was not done, because practitioner said it was folliculitis and wouldn't swab it (It was at my belt line). [Belt line is highly unlikely to relate to herpes.]   A blood test revealed I had low-ish B12 (technically in range, but at the very low end, especially for a man of my size). I had a series of B12 injections, and I am taking a B12 supplement. I am not taking any lysine or arginine at the moment. I was taking the Arganine to see if I could induce an outbreak. [This is irrelevant, there is no known linkage between herpes outbreaks and arginine/lysine intake - its a myth - and B12 infers nothing.] I think what I am asking is - has anyone here ever repeatedly tested negative over and over again over long period of time, before getting a definitive answer, be a positive test, or something else? [The answer to this is: Extremely few people with a HSV-1 infection and even more rarely HSV-2 test repeatedly negative on Westernblot and actually carry the virus. Of the cases that I know of that had delayed detection by a swab and negative blood tests in the meantime (and that's only 3-4 cases), they had some form of lesions within days of infection but did not obtain a swab for various reasons and then obtained a positive swab of a subsequent lesion with the record being 11 months later. A couple of the cases did have some 'background' symptoms they thought might be related to herpes but that isn't ascertained and some did not have any unusual symptoms at all apart from the lesions. Hence as you did not have lesions around your mouth or lips within days of the last sexual encounter as is exceptionally common for a primary oral HSV-1 infection, that pretty much rules out herpes orally as it is. The fact that you had no genital symptoms for a month also rules out genital herpes. I am not aware of anyone at all who has genuinely gone on to test positive by swab or blood in your specific circumstances. There are hundreds if not more than a thousand experiences on this website alone that are similar to yours that are truly negative for herpes I'm one of them!]  
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