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misshoneybee

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Hello everyoe. I'm a 24 year old woman from the UK. I've been living with my partner for 3 years, but recently I made a stupid mistake and slept with someone else. Neither my one night stand nor I knew he had herpes until I got horrible looking sores a week later. I have to wait another week orso to get more teststo see if he shared anything else with me. God help him if he has given me anything else.

My partner is being great about it, can't ask for more support.

I just feel so crappy about it. I feel like I can't enjoy sex with my partner anymore as he doesn't want to catch it and advice on whe I'm likely to pass it on & when I'm not is unclear.

I was given aciclovir (5 tabs a day for 5 days) and some numbing cream. I'm taking various suppliments and vitamins to boost my immune system too. Is there anything more I can do?

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hi there. sorry to here about your situation. the main thing to do babe is too keep yourself healthy, keep taking vitamins or multivitamins and excercise(yoga, running any kind). your partner will have to wear a condom when you shed your skin down below so he doesnt catch it. but thats about everything you can do. also in england you can by some numbing cream called lidocaine at the pharmacy so the next time you feel an out break coming on you can use that so your not in complete agony. hope that ive been some help. if you ever need to chat im always here. take care bye x

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Thaks cupcake. The blister type things didn't hurt really, I just felt like I had thrush or something. I'm lucky,some people are in agony with it, mine doesn't seem so bad. I had no problems urinating, just a little discomfort.

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hey

thats good to hear. your alot like me then. when i had herpes the 1st episode i thourt it was thrush and i was using all the thrush creams and had never heard of herpes before it bourt me down alot in terms of confidence but over all i found an inner strength and my confidence is back but much better. on a good note im on my 3rd month and the only thing i have had was a burn thrush sensation tht lasted 2 days and no lumps and used lidocaine cream and was back to normal again. but welcome to the site and hope to speak soon x

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I have the doctor tomorrow to see about getting something I can take daily, as reccommended by people in the chatroom, to reduce the risk of passing this to my partner. I'm so glad I have his support.

I can live with the itching, blisters & discomfort when I pee, I just don't want to pass it on. I know I can't prevent it entirely, but there's a lot I can do to minimise it. I intend to do what I can.

The guy who gave it to me doesn't believe that it was him. Probably of the lucky ones who have minimal symptoms, or he knew and just didn't educate himself. That said, ff I hadn't come down with the most horrid flu I've ever had and had an unusual feeling down there I might have been ableto believe I'd had it all along.

I'd been for STD checks often (especially when I was single) and was never offered a test for herpes. Why do the clinics not think this is important?

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    • sgt98
      Hey @WilsoInAus ok thank you, I will do my best to move on and stop trawling forums haha. 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @sgt98 but there is no feasible infection or outbreak to suppress and antivirals do not suppress an initial outbreak in any event 
    • sgt98
      Thanks @WilsoInAus I understand apologies for this but the only other thing I am worried about is that I did take a course of Famvir on day 1 as I felt like I was having an outbreak of cold sores and am worried that has suppressed the initial outbreak genitally 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @sgt98 it is not feasible to obtain a HSV-2 infection from receiving oral sex - only HSV-1 is feasible but you've already got that and immunity from any further infection with HSV-1. You do not need any further tests for HSV. You're feeling regret, try to forgive yourself and calm down, let the rational take over. You know the answer here and it won't be long until you believe it too.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @NerdP423 and welcome to the website. You raise a lot of points and I think the best way to address your concerns is add some comments at each key point. I've copied your note again below and added these comments in square brackets. I appreciate any insight (even speculation) as to what has been going on with me. I'm a 37y/o M. I last was intimate with a new partner on 2/11/2022, and a few days later started having a huge amount of discomfort in my face. [The first thing that happens though is that herpes causes lesions or at least some skin based disruption. Other symptoms are then related to the actions of the immune system responding to the virus. Without lesions, it is highly questionable that the ailment is related to herpes, yet testing is useful if you have concerns as you have done so.] About a month after that [herpes causes issues within days, if the first 'symptoms' are a month later - its extremely unlikely they are related to herpes], significant discomfort downstairs, however every test I have ever taken for HSV 1 and 2 has been negative. Here are the details: Face: Previously, some significant tingling and itching on the right side of my mouth, lips and chin (still there, but milder) [herpes does not cause general tingling and itching, it can cause a reasonably concentrated feeling of itch/throb from which a herpes lesion appears within hours]. Occasional hot flashes near my right eye, cheek and ear [herpes does not do this, it may be a immune response to something, or stress]. Sometimes it will feel like the skin is crawling on the right side of my face [herpes does not cause a general crawling sensation]. Never seen anything that looked like a traditional cold sore [that's extremely telling, even people with associated atypical symptoms will have experienced herpes lesions]. Occasionally, the left side of my face will have a momentary feeling of skin crawling, but it's so mild that I am not really worried about it. Downstairs: Thankfully, most of these are now milder than they were before. Occasional momentary pinch of pain at the base of my genitals. [herpes does not cause a general pinch feeling.] Aching pain in my boxer area (groin, leg folds) [nor this] Occasional feeling of cold in my boxer area, butt, or lower back. ( also in my shins and occasionally even my arms) [nor this] On 4/30/2022, I had been in discomfort for almost two months. I scratched an itch, noticed it hurt, and then checked - I did have an open ulcer down there. Took myself to the ER to get swabbed, came back negative. [If this was a PCR then this will be very conclusive.] Practitioner said it may come back negative because it was already open. However the lab report noted that it definitely didn't look like what you'd expect a typical first herpes outbreak to look like [how would the lab know??]. All blood tests negative so far. I had two western blots, the second one was nine months after exposure. [Two negative Westernblots!!! Many that's real convincing]. All other swabs also negative. I went to urgent care, because I know the timeliness of when the Swab is taken matters. One time, a swab was not done, because practitioner said it was folliculitis and wouldn't swab it (It was at my belt line). [Belt line is highly unlikely to relate to herpes.]   A blood test revealed I had low-ish B12 (technically in range, but at the very low end, especially for a man of my size). I had a series of B12 injections, and I am taking a B12 supplement. I am not taking any lysine or arginine at the moment. I was taking the Arganine to see if I could induce an outbreak. [This is irrelevant, there is no known linkage between herpes outbreaks and arginine/lysine intake - its a myth - and B12 infers nothing.] I think what I am asking is - has anyone here ever repeatedly tested negative over and over again over long period of time, before getting a definitive answer, be a positive test, or something else? [The answer to this is: Extremely few people with a HSV-1 infection and even more rarely HSV-2 test repeatedly negative on Westernblot and actually carry the virus. Of the cases that I know of that had delayed detection by a swab and negative blood tests in the meantime (and that's only 3-4 cases), they had some form of lesions within days of infection but did not obtain a swab for various reasons and then obtained a positive swab of a subsequent lesion with the record being 11 months later. A couple of the cases did have some 'background' symptoms they thought might be related to herpes but that isn't ascertained and some did not have any unusual symptoms at all apart from the lesions. Hence as you did not have lesions around your mouth or lips within days of the last sexual encounter as is exceptionally common for a primary oral HSV-1 infection, that pretty much rules out herpes orally as it is. The fact that you had no genital symptoms for a month also rules out genital herpes. I am not aware of anyone at all who has genuinely gone on to test positive by swab or blood in your specific circumstances. There are hundreds if not more than a thousand experiences on this website alone that are similar to yours that are truly negative for herpes I'm one of them!]  
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