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justwants2bhappy

How do i cope with this?????

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justwants2bhappy

i just found out yesterday i had the virus..... i told two of my bestfriends and it went completely wrong... and then i came up with a lie and said that the doctor misdiagnosed me... so now they think im fine..... i havent eating nor slept... i just met this guy who i really like and i dont want to mess this up b/c i know he really loves and cares for me.... and its starting to get serious..... i havent told my mom yet but i know she is going to so ashamed and hurt and disappointed in me...... i dont know what to do..... i just want this cured . i feel like my life is over now............

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JBnATL

It will get better, trust me. You can live a normal life, I know because I have. This as never stopped me from doing anything or anyone I wanted.

Your Mom does not need to know. The only people you need to tell are those you are intimate with. Ask this guy you like if he has ever had mono, chicken pox or a cold sore. All of those are caused by the Herpes virus. I bet your Mom used to get cold sores. Its the same virus. No one thinks cold sores are bad things.

There is a very active support group in Indy, www.indyhelp.com. If they have support meetings I urge you to attend. The support group here in Atlanta really helped me out when I was first diagnosed. Don't worry there will not be a sign saying "Herpes meeting" and you don't have to say a word if you dont want to. Just seeing other, normal, people there was really reassuring to me.

Come to the Chat Room, there you will find many nice fellow Herpsters who can offer you their support.

Good luck!

Jb

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WarriorKing

You are reacting to false ideas about this virus. Most people carry this virus. Most don't know it. The virus has been around for at least 4500 years. Millions upon millions of people carry this virus. Stay with us and learn a lot. You need to get rid of the false information, and realize that there are some stupid people with stupid ideas in this world.

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hbrnghn

Things will get better.

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somethingelse

I'm sorry your friends reacted badly. I had the guy who probably gave it to me react horribly, so I got rid of him (after staying with him longer than I should have because I didn't think anyone else would want to be with me). I'm pretty new to this virus too (November) and although I'm still having trouble dealing with it, I have realized it's going to help me weed out the jerks in my life.

My mom was the first person I told. I cried bawling to her after I left the dr, who took one look and said "oh that looks like herpes." She was really understanding. She gets cold sores, so she has it too. She even told me that she believes my aunt and uncle (who are the happiest older couple i know) have it, that she spread it orally to his genitals. I also told my sister and my best friend. I even just told another friend at midnight on nye and she told me she has another friend who has it. They have all been really supportive and understanding. Basically, tell whoever you feel comfortable with. But no one NEEDS to know this about you (unless you are planning on getting intimate with them). The majority of people don't know the facts, and that's the hard part. I always make sure to include the basic facts when I tell.

Good luck, hope you feel better, and hope this helps a little.

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justwants2bhappy

i appreciate everything you all said...... it is hard to deal with but today is a better for me.... ive been on here all day looking at all the information given, reading testimonies and how people are dealing with it, and its helping alot.... my mom knows and suprisingly is very supportive.... now, its just i gota figure out a way to tell this guy that i really like..... i know he deserves to know but i dont know how to tell him......... because i honestly do not know how he'll react... i just ready for a cure !!!! like everybody else is!

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Merlin

Listen Justwants2behappy,

I understand how you feel, b/c I just got dx'd too. It really sucks; I feel your pain (no pun intended)! I'm sorry your friends reacted how they did. It hurts when friends don't support you but a lot of times, that kind of reaction just comes out of ignorance - they just don't understand about herpes. For all they know they could have it too and don't even know it. Now as for this guy you're involved with, if he really loves and cares for you, he will understand. I know it is scary to think about telling him, but just take a nice deep breath and remember that you are worth being able to be accepted for all of who you are. Good luck.

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