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Sex after an outbreak

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I was wondering how long you should wait after an outbreak to have sex. I had my first outbreak and it healed really well. My boyfriend and i had sex last night and it was painful! Now i'm all sore and itchy. :(

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I normally wait 5 to 6 days, more if I can (on suppressive meds I only get one outbreak every year so it doesn't seem like too much of an inconvenience)

By then the symptoms have cleared up and the area is not red anymore. My worry is more about residual virus on my skin that may infect my partner rather than the discomfit.

The strange thing about having herpes is the paranoia--constantly analysing every pinch and discomfit in the special area and wondering if it is some new game the herpes is playing. I think that is quite common.

If you have only just had your first outbreak it will take you a bit of time to learn how your body reacts, how frequently you get outbreaks, what causes them. You will definitely start to feel more confident and find things easier as it becomes more familiar to you.

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Thanks. :) I'm still a bit itchy, the soreness is gone. It's really difficult because my boyfriend wants sex and so do i, but i have to say no because i know i'll regret it afterward if i don't wait longer.

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If I may make another suggestion... lube. Friction is not your friend, and can trigger obs after sex. So, even if you think you don't need it, use lube. It may help prevent those 'day after' symptoms.

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Try a Lysine supplement for cold sores

  • The Hive is Thriving!

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    • Quest
      Him holding my hips, grabbing ass, then grabbing his cock is what I worry about. I also worry about shedding anywhere from the boxer shorts area and that's a mighty big area. It is the unknown. It would be nice to cover the entire area and then I just don't have to worry! Then the part that is exposed which  would be a very small spot. Maybe cover with that liquid glove?!? I just like the idea of doing my best
    • 35hope
    • Hairpees
      I wouldn’t because that would be outing myself as well unfortunately. It just sucks because our mutual friends have no clue why I carry such resentment towards him, and wonder why they can’t even bring up his name around me anymore. Im sure they think I’m a crazy jealous person who is hurt things didn’t work out or that I’m being dramatic for no reason. I can’t explain to or confide in anyone but the users on this forum.
    • Jorjanewnew
      Girl! I am actually on the same exact position. My new bf gave it to me and he put the blame on me! When he was my 2nd partner and I hadn’t had sex in 5 years (last guy was a virgin). I know that alone feeling but know you’re not alone. I just got diagnosed 2 weeks ago too. It’s crazy you see yourself differently but I promise no one around you does.
    • Cas9
      How would that location (upper crack) come in contact with him during doggy style sex? Maybe after the act if he fell on top of you while you're face down. I would suggest simply observing whether there are sores in these areas that are somewhat removed from the genital area. If there are no sores than the odds of you transferring to him such as the lower stomach or leg etc.., are pretty damn low. Obviously, we can come always come up with a scenario where you could transmit. For example, if you were on your stomach and he was sliding his dick up and down your butt crack and you had sores there, then yes, he could get infected. If you were just shedding there it would be less likely but possible. But try doing that with your clothes on. I don't think that would work out very well; Do you?  Wearing clothes during sex like that woman you portrayed in your earlier comment is sexy. But that's all together different.

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