So sureal

[on the rocks]

I have always been very cautious about my health, i waited till i was much older to have sex since I was always scared of catching something. As time when on I became very good about getting myself checked out. So when I found out 3 days after New years i had Herpes my world completely stopped. i was still on my back when the doctor mentioned "oh, this isn't a tear it looks like herpes." I was completely distraught to hear what the doctor had to say, considering i was just going in to get some sort of topical cream for the "tears" I thought i had after wild holiday weekend with my boyfriend. After all the test, all I could think of was, i need to get out of here. So much so I don't remember what she said and i refuse to get the antiviral meds she offered while i waited for my results, DENIAL!

When i walked out i had my friend waiting for me and all i can do was cry to her. She was a great support although she couldn't wrap her around the situation. We researched while i waited for antibiotic, all the while we went back and forth on how i got it and how my boyfriend might have cheated. When i finally got to my boyfriends that afternoon, he could immediately tell something was wrong. I had promised myself, i was going to give my boyfriend the 3rd degree but when i asked and he told me no i believed him and broke down. Looking back i feel horrible for ever thinking he would do such a thing and not telling him as soon as got there since i could not stop crying. After i let it out we both cried for about an hour and i half he got sick and i cried some more.

Since then he has gotten checked out, We both have it although were not sure what strain it is. Sometimes i wish i could go through it alone so he wouldn't have to go through the excruciating pain. He is the biggest support i have and it helps im not going through it alone, i have him. On the bright side the relationship has gotten so much stronger.

Now i'm taking it day by day, research and this forum have definitely helped me not lose all my marbles. However, I still fall asleep hoping that when i wake up in the morning, the nightmare will be over. all i can do now is wait for my world to start spinning again.

[JBnATL]

Hi there, welcome to the 'club'!

Were you only diagnosed visually or have you taken a blood or swab test? Most tests can determine what kind it is because if tested positive he may have it only orally since 80% of the adult population has it oral.

And if neither of you were virgins when you entered the relationship, either of you could have had it and not know it.

Either way, don't worry about it. Herpes is very common and the longer you have it the easier it gets. I have had it a long time and it has never stopped me from doing anything or anyone I wanted.

Come to the Chat Room, there you will find many nice Herpsters who can offer you their support.

Good luck!

JB

[abfab]

oh geez, that made me laugh.. ! '...never stopped me from doing anything or anyone I wanted...' lol..

im new to all this as well, but what i find, with all these groups and forums and such- everyone gets into how devastating it is (and it can be, i know) but noone really gets into how to go on, move forward..

for those of you with more 'experience' with it (weird way to put it!) maybe talking about how you talk to your s/o's about it.. or any for that matter! i know theres all kinda of ways to go about it, and all kinda of reactions.. but i think the general consensus is that once you have this you are totally unlovable and will never ever be with anyone ever again, but its not true!

so maybe some stories showing how life *really does* go on!