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Hi everybody! I just stumbled across this site and was very happy to see that there is such a great community to provide support. I hope that I can become a part of the community on this site to provide advice and support to everybody who needs it.

I was diagnosed with GH about a year and a half ago, in May of 2009 just a few days after my 19th birthday. It was given to me by a guy that I had dated throughout all of high school, and then I had went out-of-state to college and when I came back for summer, he asked to hang out and the rest is history. When I was diagnosed, I was devastated. My first OB was horrendous and I was sick for around two weeks, and then I became sick with pneumonia immediately afterwards. I felt depressed, disgusted with myself, and shocked; I had only ever been with two guys, both of which I had been in relationships with, and I had contracted an STD... something I thought would never happen to me. Researching it online only scared me more, especially when reading about the worse possible scenarios. My best friend and I went to a Planned Parenthood, where I got tested, because I was too scared to tell my mom before I knew what it was.

I have been taking Valtrex since about a month after my first outbreak, and I'm happy to say that I haven't experienced any symptoms since!! However, it has definitely changed my life- not so much drastically, but for example, it's changed the way I approach relationships, my tolerance for certain types of humor (jokes about STDs have become VERY not funny), and I've become very involved with my University's sexual health awareness group. A few months after my diagnosis, I started dating a guy seriously, and "the talk" was extremely hard... when I had to explain it, I nearly broke down. **If anybody needs help or advice on how to approach the topic, I'm more than willing to share my experiences!

Basically, I've tried to look at my diagnosis as a learning experience. I think that I've matured as a person and I've become involved in my community to try to better educate people to be safe so that they can avoid the hurt and confusion that I had to go through. If anybody ever wants to chat, just let me know! :)

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Welcome to the 'club'!

I have had it many years and it has not stopped me from doing anything or anyone I wanted. I have given the 'talk' many times and have never been rejected. I simply start out by asking them if they have ever had a cold sore. No one thinks cold sores are bad things. Then I tell them I get cold sores but not on my face. I do ask if they know what causes cold sores and informs them if they do not.

Come to the Chat Room, there you will find many nice fellow Herpsters who can offer you their advice.

Good luck!


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hey mpls5

Read your thread there and couldn't believe when i seen you were only 20, you have a fab attitude this all. Think you're great for becoming involved in your sexual health uni group- fair dues. May well take you up on your offer of advice on 'the talk' should the time arise. only been diagnoised for a month and the prospect of having the talk just fills me with dread. i hear ya on the unfunny std jokes, had one of my friends recently comment on a promiscious person known to us as a whore with prob every std available flying around. I'm 25yrs have only had three sexual partners and all of them long relationships( except the last which came to an abrupt halt once my diagnosis came through- hee) so i didn't particularly appreciate her remarks but am finding that as with all these sorts of things you can just let them slide off. Delighted to hear you've had no more breakouts- are you on suppressents or the delightful 'h' just hasn't reared it's head again?

All the best,


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Hi Cailin! I didn't deal well with it for a while, but once I had the support of my mom as well as the few friends I've told and the guy I started dating after my diagnosis, it became a lot easier, because I found that nobody thought I was a whore or promiscuous or anything... they understood and were there to support me when I needed them. I've gotten a lot better about the jokes, at first I couldn't stand hearing them and would get upset and defensive (even though nobody knew why I was so defensive)... but now I realize that people don't know better and I know that I'm guilty of throwing a few of those jokes around myself. I'd love to chat if you need any advice about the talk, I've had it with three or four of my close friends as well as two guys that I've seriously dated and it's gone well each time. I think the key is really just helping them understand and being able to answer their questions... even if you can't answer them, looking up the answer together so then you both know!

I'm THRILLED I haven't had more breakouts... I was so scared of them when I got my diagnosis, I felt like I'd have them every month and was really upset! I take Valtrex as a daily suppressant and it's worked great for me. Even if I forget to take it for a few days, I haven't had any problems!!

Great to meet you, and I'm sure I'll see you around! :)


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    • sgt98
      Hey @WilsoInAus ok thank you, I will do my best to move on and stop trawling forums haha. 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @sgt98 but there is no feasible infection or outbreak to suppress and antivirals do not suppress an initial outbreak in any event 
    • sgt98
      Thanks @WilsoInAus I understand apologies for this but the only other thing I am worried about is that I did take a course of Famvir on day 1 as I felt like I was having an outbreak of cold sores and am worried that has suppressed the initial outbreak genitally 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @sgt98 it is not feasible to obtain a HSV-2 infection from receiving oral sex - only HSV-1 is feasible but you've already got that and immunity from any further infection with HSV-1. You do not need any further tests for HSV. You're feeling regret, try to forgive yourself and calm down, let the rational take over. You know the answer here and it won't be long until you believe it too.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @NerdP423 and welcome to the website. You raise a lot of points and I think the best way to address your concerns is add some comments at each key point. I've copied your note again below and added these comments in square brackets. I appreciate any insight (even speculation) as to what has been going on with me. I'm a 37y/o M. I last was intimate with a new partner on 2/11/2022, and a few days later started having a huge amount of discomfort in my face. [The first thing that happens though is that herpes causes lesions or at least some skin based disruption. Other symptoms are then related to the actions of the immune system responding to the virus. Without lesions, it is highly questionable that the ailment is related to herpes, yet testing is useful if you have concerns as you have done so.] About a month after that [herpes causes issues within days, if the first 'symptoms' are a month later - its extremely unlikely they are related to herpes], significant discomfort downstairs, however every test I have ever taken for HSV 1 and 2 has been negative. Here are the details: Face: Previously, some significant tingling and itching on the right side of my mouth, lips and chin (still there, but milder) [herpes does not cause general tingling and itching, it can cause a reasonably concentrated feeling of itch/throb from which a herpes lesion appears within hours]. Occasional hot flashes near my right eye, cheek and ear [herpes does not do this, it may be a immune response to something, or stress]. Sometimes it will feel like the skin is crawling on the right side of my face [herpes does not cause a general crawling sensation]. Never seen anything that looked like a traditional cold sore [that's extremely telling, even people with associated atypical symptoms will have experienced herpes lesions]. Occasionally, the left side of my face will have a momentary feeling of skin crawling, but it's so mild that I am not really worried about it. Downstairs: Thankfully, most of these are now milder than they were before. Occasional momentary pinch of pain at the base of my genitals. [herpes does not cause a general pinch feeling.] Aching pain in my boxer area (groin, leg folds) [nor this] Occasional feeling of cold in my boxer area, butt, or lower back. ( also in my shins and occasionally even my arms) [nor this] On 4/30/2022, I had been in discomfort for almost two months. I scratched an itch, noticed it hurt, and then checked - I did have an open ulcer down there. Took myself to the ER to get swabbed, came back negative. [If this was a PCR then this will be very conclusive.] Practitioner said it may come back negative because it was already open. However the lab report noted that it definitely didn't look like what you'd expect a typical first herpes outbreak to look like [how would the lab know??]. All blood tests negative so far. I had two western blots, the second one was nine months after exposure. [Two negative Westernblots!!! Many that's real convincing]. All other swabs also negative. I went to urgent care, because I know the timeliness of when the Swab is taken matters. One time, a swab was not done, because practitioner said it was folliculitis and wouldn't swab it (It was at my belt line). [Belt line is highly unlikely to relate to herpes.]   A blood test revealed I had low-ish B12 (technically in range, but at the very low end, especially for a man of my size). I had a series of B12 injections, and I am taking a B12 supplement. I am not taking any lysine or arginine at the moment. I was taking the Arganine to see if I could induce an outbreak. [This is irrelevant, there is no known linkage between herpes outbreaks and arginine/lysine intake - its a myth - and B12 infers nothing.] I think what I am asking is - has anyone here ever repeatedly tested negative over and over again over long period of time, before getting a definitive answer, be a positive test, or something else? [The answer to this is: Extremely few people with a HSV-1 infection and even more rarely HSV-2 test repeatedly negative on Westernblot and actually carry the virus. Of the cases that I know of that had delayed detection by a swab and negative blood tests in the meantime (and that's only 3-4 cases), they had some form of lesions within days of infection but did not obtain a swab for various reasons and then obtained a positive swab of a subsequent lesion with the record being 11 months later. A couple of the cases did have some 'background' symptoms they thought might be related to herpes but that isn't ascertained and some did not have any unusual symptoms at all apart from the lesions. Hence as you did not have lesions around your mouth or lips within days of the last sexual encounter as is exceptionally common for a primary oral HSV-1 infection, that pretty much rules out herpes orally as it is. The fact that you had no genital symptoms for a month also rules out genital herpes. I am not aware of anyone at all who has genuinely gone on to test positive by swab or blood in your specific circumstances. There are hundreds if not more than a thousand experiences on this website alone that are similar to yours that are truly negative for herpes I'm one of them!]  
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