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Newly diagnosed and need some advice! Help!


bluesand101

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Hi there. I haven't been confirmed to have herpes yet, but here is how my story goes. I had unprotected sex on new years eve and then two days later (Sunday) with the same person. I started having symptoms of what I thought was a yeast infection on Monday night, but by Wednesday I new something was not right. I went to the doctor and she told me it looked like I had herpes. She took a swab and I came back the next day for a round of blood tests. I don't get my results until next week, but I am almost 100% sure I have herpes because of the symptoms (excrutiating sores, discharge, pain when urinating).

I have been doing a lot of self care and reading a lot of websites as to not freak myself out. I think I am doing okay and will be okay besides one aspect of this whole situation. The person I slept with is a friend of mine. We all have mutual friends and I am not sure if he is the one who gave it to me, or if I slept with him unknowingly having herpes the whole time. I am pretty sure this is my first outbreak. I have lots of sores and was in a great deal of pain the last couple of days (from the sores, headaches and shooting pains down my legs and in my groin). I am just not sure if 3 days is too soon to be showing symptoms for a first outbreak? I was pretty run down after new years and am freaking out a little that I might have given it to my friend if indeed he does not have it. I know I have to tell him, but I don't know how to go about it. If he did give it to me then I am pretty sure the virus will not show up in my blood test because it would be too soon (it's only been 8 days). So how do I go about doing this?? The guy I slept with has still been texting me asking me out all week and I keep on having to make excuses! I can only say I am "sick" for so long... Ahh I don't want any of my other friends to find out, but I know I need to tell this guy. Even though he may have it too, I am scared he is going to tell everyone and then I'll lose all my friends. I cannot deal with that right now. I am handling everything else fine, but I am just so scared as to what to say to him, or how to ask him if he has it (I know he may have it and not even know!!!) Any advice on this would be greatly appreciated... I am freaking out just a little. Thanks.

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Mine started out with sex on a Sunday and a yeast infection by Wednesday and blisters by Thursday. I think I have read that you can have symptoms as early as 2 days later. So yes it is possible to have symptoms within 3 days. Have you ever been tested for herpes?

I wonder if you could talk to him (private place and in person) and just tell him straight up. Sex with you Friday and Sunday and now I have symptoms and have seen a doctor. Have you had any symptoms or ever been tested? Try to be calm and factual. Drama will only make things worse. Good luck.

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Hi Amalia,

I don't think I have been tested for HSV because I did not know that it was not included in the standard STD testing (which I think is ridiculous!). So I'm not sure either way. It is possible that I may have had the virus already and not known. I don't think I have had any past symptoms, but who knows because it seems HSV symptoms can be mistaken for many other things (yeast infections, razor burn, pimples, etc.). I think I might just wait until I get my results on Wednesday and then talk to him then. If the blood test is negative, and the swab positive, then it is definitely a new infection. You are right to just be straight up and not dramatic, which I am planning on doing... it's just difficult, but hopefully he will understand and not make it into a bigger deal than it is... Thanks for the advice.

***Also, any stories of how you confronted someone about having HSV? How did you ask someone you had slept with if they had it too?

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