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need advice in Georgia

janay

By janay
in Herpes, Justice and the Law

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janay Honeycomb Member

janay

Posted
Posted

I have a question and would like some opinions. I was recently diagnosed with herpes given from my ex. I was told that his ex has been diagnosed as well and there is a possiblity he knew he had when we engaged in sex. They are back together and neither one will tell me when she tested positive. I had negative blood test a month before sex with him and had positive culture test a week after sex. He's the only person I've been with. I believe he knew he could passed to me.. I know I decided to have sex with him but he was dishonest the entire time. He cried with me when I got the news. can I file claim against him

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JBnATL Platinum Support Member

JBnATL

Posted
Posted

Hi, welcome to the 'club'!

You would be wasting your time in filing a claim against him. You would have to prove that he knew he had it and that would almost be impossible to prove. And unless he has a lot of money it would really not be worth your time.

If you were a virgin before him, why did you take a blood test? If you were not a virgin there is always a chance you could have had it and have yet to build up the antibodies the test looks for.

Check out www.atlantahclub.com it is a social group here that meets monthly. There is also a support group that meets every second Thursday at Piedmont Hospital. That group really helped me out when I was first diagnosed. I plan on going this coming Thursday. You can find out the details of the meeting on that website or PM me and I can give it to you. At the last meeting they mentioned that the percentage of those in the ATL that had genital herpes is 33%.

Come to the Chat Room, there you will find many nice Herpsters who can offer you their support.

Good luck!

JB

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Tiny Established Member

Tiny

Posted
Posted

My abusive ex gave it to me on purpose. Its a long story. But he was well aware of what he was doing and later took the time to tell me that I deserved it because I had ruined his life (he did that in writing so I suppose I had evidence). But you know what, I never even considered legal action. Firstly, for me to go through that emotionally would not have been healthy having my life picked apart by lawyers. Secondly what would the damages realistically be...there is unlikely to be loss of earnings, the only actual costs are those of the medication, possibly pain and suffering but unless you could prove that it would be hard to get a lot of money...you would really have to struck it lucky on punitive damages (that being said I think the law in Australia is a little different when it come to damages). It appears, at least in Australia they are only just starting to have successful prosecutions (and therefore precedents are starting to be set) with HIV, but they are criminal rather than civil cases at this stage...HIV does have the whole terminal aspect. It is hard, when you are suffering not to want to punish the person who put you in that situation. But you know what the less you think about them the better...that person did a bad thing to you...don't let them continue to be a part of your life--they don't deserve that power. Which takes me to my third point, for me it was healthier to disassociate my herpes from the person who gave it to me and dedicate no more of my life to thinking about him--because then in my head he continued to beat me.

JBinAtl makes a fantastic offer, look forward...meet people who can help and support you...get some counselling...those are much more productive and positive things for you to do.

Thing will get better...they always do :-)

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      What is the usual order of events in initial infection for GHSV?

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      What is the usual order of events in initial infection for GHSV?

      By sgt98 · Posted

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      What is the usual order of events in initial infection for GHSV?

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    • WilsoInAus
      Looking for some insight on an atypical experience.

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Without lesions, it is highly questionable that the ailment is related to herpes, yet testing is useful if you have concerns as you have done so.] About a month after that [herpes causes issues within days, if the first 'symptoms' are a month later - its extremely unlikely they are related to herpes], significant discomfort downstairs, however every test I have ever taken for HSV 1 and 2 has been negative. Here are the details: Face: Previously, some significant tingling and itching on the right side of my mouth, lips and chin (still there, but milder) [herpes does not cause general tingling and itching, it can cause a reasonably concentrated feeling of itch/throb from which a herpes lesion appears within hours]. Occasional hot flashes near my right eye, cheek and ear [herpes does not do this, it may be a immune response to something, or stress]. Sometimes it will feel like the skin is crawling on the right side of my face [herpes does not cause a general crawling sensation]. Never seen anything that looked like a traditional cold sore [that's extremely telling, even people with associated atypical symptoms will have experienced herpes lesions]. Occasionally, the left side of my face will have a momentary feeling of skin crawling, but it's so mild that I am not really worried about it. Downstairs: Thankfully, most of these are now milder than they were before. Occasional momentary pinch of pain at the base of my genitals. [herpes does not cause a general pinch feeling.] Aching pain in my boxer area (groin, leg folds) [nor this] Occasional feeling of cold in my boxer area, butt, or lower back. ( also in my shins and occasionally even my arms) [nor this] On 4/30/2022, I had been in discomfort for almost two months. I scratched an itch, noticed it hurt, and then checked - I did have an open ulcer down there. Took myself to the ER to get swabbed, came back negative. 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There are hundreds if not more than a thousand experiences on this website alone that are similar to yours that are truly negative for herpes I'm one of them!]  
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