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We had the talk a year ago but now he's asking questions but im too scared to talk

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Well over a year ago now we first slept together but b4 i obviously told him on the fone - I have herpes. And I said it like it was no big deal and his reaction was no big deal, he said thats alright ive never caught anything and slept with girls that have got that b4. So yer but now hes asking questions and wantsto know about it and im way to shy to talk about it with him. I dont want him to know about it, i feel embaressed ashamed, diseased. I said its no big deal jus like a coldsore but down there heaps of people have it, he said to me i should go get a check up, then i got sought of angry. Why do i need to be checkd for something ive already got and have known for 10 years. I dont think he realised theres no cure. Well hes never had any symptoms and weve slept together enough if he was goin to catch it. Does this mean he's in the clear? Or is it jus waiting dormant in his system waiting to come out when he gets badly stressed one day? I told him about it b4 we slept together and he wont wear a condom, and then i broke down about it one day and hed forgotton that id even told him. Im confused help me..........PLEASE I NEED SOME ADVICE!

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Hi Nice. You say that you are too shy to talk to your bf about it, one thing you can do is print out information for him and give it to him to read. There is a lot of great information to the right. You can print it out for him. I still think he should be able to ask you follow up questions though. I know you are shy, but if you've been together for over a year and you guys are sexually active, you should be able to talk to him about this. I know it is going to be hard, but if he has questions you guys should be able to talk about it. You say you don't want him to know about it, but he should know about it and his risks (assuming he doesn't have it) since he is in a relationship with someone who has it. Don't feel embarrassed, ashamed, or diseased. Don't make it a bigger deal then it is. Like you said, its just cold sores down there. It is a common and mostly harmless skin condition. You have no reason to feel ashamed or be embarrassed. :) He could also go to his doctors or somewhere like planned parenthood to get information about it. I hope that helps a bit.

I don't know why he would want you to get a check up. Sounds like he really doesn't understand the virus. That is why some education for him would be really good. Tell him that it doesn't change and there is no reason for you to get a check up. You have it and know what strain it is (I'm assuming), no reason to get checked again. Has he ever been checked for HSV? If not, he really should get checked. There is a chance he has it and it is dormant. He may have gotten it from you or someone else. He might also not have it. The only way to know is for him to get a blood test - an IgG type specific one.

I hope this helps. Take care! :)

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Try a Lysine supplement for cold sores

  • The Hive is Thriving!

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    • Chicken23
      Kelly bean yes I had an ulcer in my mouth. I know it' unusual but as soon as he had told me that I got it swabbed and it came back positive. Then I had a blood test and that came back positive as well.   Anon222 Thank you it's just incredibly difficult thing to deal with. Especially being such a new thing to me.  It will change things though. I will never rest easy. I will always be worried about getting another one come up, I will have to pay expenses for preventative measures. I will have to tell everyone that wants to kiss me (not that I go around just kissing people but as this is life long never know how many people that may be) so it will be changing a lotg for me. I will never feel comfortable just kissing someone anymore. I will always be worried about passing it onto them. It changes my whole life. I will never be able to kiss a new born baby (If I ever have another child)  I will not be able to do so many things without stress and worry for the rest of my life:( 
    • Anon222
      Hey there Chicken, I agree with what helpme said. Really no one cares about OHSV-1. Not to diminish your feelings but I just want you to know that it’s going to be okay. You honestly don’t have to worry about this at all. As he also said you are now in the MAJORITY of people. Please just go on living your normal life this should not change anything at all! Good luck! 
    • helpme12345
      I know blood test doesn't tell location. I know i have it orally since i had it as a child but i dont have any breakouts at all, the last breakout i remember was inside my lips when i was a kid. Like me my friends and my gf we are all asymptomatic orally. im just worried if the above mention symptoms say i have ghsv1?  and about disclosure im happy to tell. im not scared of it im just worried if i got it in the genitals, although all my doctors say im fine.
    • Hairpees
      I don’t understand this post. You seem highly concerned of having herpes for someone who already tested positive for herpes. Your girlfriend has tested positive for herpes. What more is there to freak out about? Blood tests do not tell you location, are you worried if you break up how you will handle disclosure To someone else? That’s where I’m getting confused. 
    • mconcerned1986
      Tested negative for both 1&2 for western blot. 

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