Jump to content

Sucks got it from my soon to be ex husband!!!


leigh21

Recommended Posts

I am going through a divorce together for 12 years have 2 little girls and found out most of our marriage he was cheating. I am going through a lot, going to loose my house, have to go back to work, girls have to change schools etc so this is just the one thing know matter what I do I can't change it and it won't get better. I'm nervous about the first time I have to tell a new partner about it I don't want to be single forever I'm only 38 years old!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You won't have to be single. I know it is easy to imagine the worst scenario, but that one is not the real one. I have carried this for over 32 years, and had two marriages. Lots of people have this and lots of people will want you whether they have this or not.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree. It's devastating, but truly not the end of relationships. My boyfriend has it, and while it was a shock at first, I learned more about it and we're both coping. He has a mild case. I might feel differently if he had it really severely.

Also, I have been hearing a lot about a relatively new (I'm not sure exactly when this came out) drug called Resolve. It apparently requires about 6 months of treatment, but if you look at comments on other Herpes blogs, it has had some pretty impressive results. People typically get lots of symptoms during the course of the drugs, but this seems part of the process of the virus being expelled fro the system. I even saw one post where someone came back with a clear blood test. I think I'm going to suggest it to my boyfriend.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Also, I have been hearing a lot about a relatively new (I'm not sure exactly when this came out) drug called Resolve. It apparently requires about 6 months of treatment, but if you look at comments on other Herpes blogs, it has had some pretty impressive results. People typically get lots of symptoms during the course of the drugs, but this seems part of the process of the virus being expelled fro the system. I even saw one post where someone came back with a clear blood test. I think I'm going to suggest it to my boyfriend.

I'm really sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but Resolve is a scam. HSV is a virus & cannot be expelled from the body by improving one's immune system. I researched it thoroughly, as well. I did see two people that reportedly returned with negative blood results (perhaps Resolve does something to suppress antibodies) but both people returned months later, after suffering outbreaks, & had positive tests. The good news is, I am confident HSV will be a thing of the past. There are many drugs/vaccines and, even cures, in development -- some even in Phase I & Phase II trials already. Hang on. We'll get there.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks everyone joining this site has made me feel better, I am one of the lucky ones I guess I rarely have any issues at all the first time I had a tiny one while I was pregnant with my now 3 yr old daughter and I didn't think anything of it because i was/am married and thought no way. I am so angry that he did this to me with all the other stuff I am going through this is making it WAY WORSE!!!! I have lived in the same place my whole life so when I hopefully, do start dating everyone knows everyone so when i have to have the conversation when he stay or he goes I feel like the word will get around and that will be the end of that!! Thanks everyone for your help!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I agree. It's devastating, but truly not the end of relationships. My boyfriend has it, and while it was a shock at first, I learned more about it and we're both coping. He has a mild case. I might feel differently if he had it really severely.

I sure hope you are aware that the fact your boyfriend gets mild symptoms has absolutely no bearing on what your experience might be if you get herpes from him. You could have a really tough time with it. Women in general seem to have worse outbreaks than men.

My guy also has HSV, while I don't. I had to recognize that I might have severe outbreaks if I contract herpes from him. I had to accept that possibility when I decided to be intimate with him.

I just hope you understand that could happen to you as well.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think Mr Honest is right on the money. It is an emotional disease that reacts to certain neurotransmitters in the affected area. If you are stressed and apprehensive it will manifest itself more frequently and with greater veracity, in some instances. Just know that you are valuable as a person and HSV is not the compass that points you to your future. Hold your head up high when you wake up this morning, smile at yourself and laugh in the mirror and just don't even think about it as a problem, but a challenge. Rise to it. :-) Hope this helps.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I recently had a talk with a girl who's had HSV since 2005, and she was a real help to me as well about the whole dating thing. Since her first outbreak she's had a few partners and only one person has not looked for more with her after the "talk". HSV is not an end to one's dating life, just a massive inconvenience during breakouts. :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I caught herpes from a cheating ex.

i thought id never get a boyfriend/be happy/be loved/have sex again

i thought it for a year

but i meet someone, and after a while i decided to tell him

he didnt care and it didnt change n e thing. 5 months on were so in love.

dont loose heart. have hope. And what dont kill you makes you stronger....

i believe in karma too... what goes around

GOOD LUCK

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks so much LivingtheDream, this is just so new to me and I'm dealing with so many other things because of this divorce I'm going through.

Definitely a tough time you are going through.

{{{{HUGS}}}} :itllbeok:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



  • Donate

    If Honeycomb has helped you, please help us by making a donation so we can provide you with even better features and services.

  • The Hive is Thriving!

    • Total Topics
      72.1k
    • Total Posts
      486.3k
  • Posts

    • sgt98
      Hey @WilsoInAus ok thank you, I will do my best to move on and stop trawling forums haha. 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hey @sgt98 but there is no feasible infection or outbreak to suppress and antivirals do not suppress an initial outbreak in any event 
    • sgt98
      Thanks @WilsoInAus I understand apologies for this but the only other thing I am worried about is that I did take a course of Famvir on day 1 as I felt like I was having an outbreak of cold sores and am worried that has suppressed the initial outbreak genitally 
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @sgt98 it is not feasible to obtain a HSV-2 infection from receiving oral sex - only HSV-1 is feasible but you've already got that and immunity from any further infection with HSV-1. You do not need any further tests for HSV. You're feeling regret, try to forgive yourself and calm down, let the rational take over. You know the answer here and it won't be long until you believe it too.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @NerdP423 and welcome to the website. You raise a lot of points and I think the best way to address your concerns is add some comments at each key point. I've copied your note again below and added these comments in square brackets. I appreciate any insight (even speculation) as to what has been going on with me. I'm a 37y/o M. I last was intimate with a new partner on 2/11/2022, and a few days later started having a huge amount of discomfort in my face. [The first thing that happens though is that herpes causes lesions or at least some skin based disruption. Other symptoms are then related to the actions of the immune system responding to the virus. Without lesions, it is highly questionable that the ailment is related to herpes, yet testing is useful if you have concerns as you have done so.] About a month after that [herpes causes issues within days, if the first 'symptoms' are a month later - its extremely unlikely they are related to herpes], significant discomfort downstairs, however every test I have ever taken for HSV 1 and 2 has been negative. Here are the details: Face: Previously, some significant tingling and itching on the right side of my mouth, lips and chin (still there, but milder) [herpes does not cause general tingling and itching, it can cause a reasonably concentrated feeling of itch/throb from which a herpes lesion appears within hours]. Occasional hot flashes near my right eye, cheek and ear [herpes does not do this, it may be a immune response to something, or stress]. Sometimes it will feel like the skin is crawling on the right side of my face [herpes does not cause a general crawling sensation]. Never seen anything that looked like a traditional cold sore [that's extremely telling, even people with associated atypical symptoms will have experienced herpes lesions]. Occasionally, the left side of my face will have a momentary feeling of skin crawling, but it's so mild that I am not really worried about it. Downstairs: Thankfully, most of these are now milder than they were before. Occasional momentary pinch of pain at the base of my genitals. [herpes does not cause a general pinch feeling.] Aching pain in my boxer area (groin, leg folds) [nor this] Occasional feeling of cold in my boxer area, butt, or lower back. ( also in my shins and occasionally even my arms) [nor this] On 4/30/2022, I had been in discomfort for almost two months. I scratched an itch, noticed it hurt, and then checked - I did have an open ulcer down there. Took myself to the ER to get swabbed, came back negative. [If this was a PCR then this will be very conclusive.] Practitioner said it may come back negative because it was already open. However the lab report noted that it definitely didn't look like what you'd expect a typical first herpes outbreak to look like [how would the lab know??]. All blood tests negative so far. I had two western blots, the second one was nine months after exposure. [Two negative Westernblots!!! Many that's real convincing]. All other swabs also negative. I went to urgent care, because I know the timeliness of when the Swab is taken matters. One time, a swab was not done, because practitioner said it was folliculitis and wouldn't swab it (It was at my belt line). [Belt line is highly unlikely to relate to herpes.]   A blood test revealed I had low-ish B12 (technically in range, but at the very low end, especially for a man of my size). I had a series of B12 injections, and I am taking a B12 supplement. I am not taking any lysine or arginine at the moment. I was taking the Arganine to see if I could induce an outbreak. [This is irrelevant, there is no known linkage between herpes outbreaks and arginine/lysine intake - its a myth - and B12 infers nothing.] I think what I am asking is - has anyone here ever repeatedly tested negative over and over again over long period of time, before getting a definitive answer, be a positive test, or something else? [The answer to this is: Extremely few people with a HSV-1 infection and even more rarely HSV-2 test repeatedly negative on Westernblot and actually carry the virus. Of the cases that I know of that had delayed detection by a swab and negative blood tests in the meantime (and that's only 3-4 cases), they had some form of lesions within days of infection but did not obtain a swab for various reasons and then obtained a positive swab of a subsequent lesion with the record being 11 months later. A couple of the cases did have some 'background' symptoms they thought might be related to herpes but that isn't ascertained and some did not have any unusual symptoms at all apart from the lesions. Hence as you did not have lesions around your mouth or lips within days of the last sexual encounter as is exceptionally common for a primary oral HSV-1 infection, that pretty much rules out herpes orally as it is. The fact that you had no genital symptoms for a month also rules out genital herpes. I am not aware of anyone at all who has genuinely gone on to test positive by swab or blood in your specific circumstances. There are hundreds if not more than a thousand experiences on this website alone that are similar to yours that are truly negative for herpes I'm one of them!]  
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.