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fattypatty

The difference in generations

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fattypatty

I am very close to my adult sons and discussed my recent turmoil with this issues. My 29 year old had a rather laid back attitude. When I was moaning that I would never have a date again, he simply said, "Just find someone who has the same shit you have." Easier said than done, but his light attitude made me laugh.,

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RON123

your boy does,nt know what it feels like to never have another date a gain or any other younge person or for that matter even me..thats why im where im at today because i just wouldnt think about the future.hope the younger people will learn from are misstakes..good luck patty and all..

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gotitsowhat

I have had type 2 genital herpes for about 16 years now. For most of those years, I hid in the "herpes closet," did not tell any of my friends about it, did not even consider dating. Then I decided to tell my friends. I told one guy I have known for many years about my condition and mentioned how scary the idea of dating can be for an hsv infected person. I pointed out that I had just read a survey that said 9 out of 10 people would not want to date someone with genital herpes.

He said, "That's great! Then you only need to go on ten dates!"

I laughed, then added with more seriousness, "But, really, I do not think that would work for me at this point--I'm old and fat!"

He looked serious and thoughtful for a moment and then said, "Yeah, you're right....TWENTY dates!"

Actually, he's right....it's only a matter of how brave you are willing to be when it comes to meeting with some rejection. If you keep it up, the odds eventually work in your favor.

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islandgal49

I felt I needed to respond to both of your posts. I started dating a 57 yr old man about 2 yrs ago that I knew got the occasional cold sore. Whenever he had an OB we were careful about not having any contact with his lips as we knew it could spread. I was fine with that, I wanted a relationship with the man and all the fine characters that he had. Over the past 2 years I have been amazed at what a wonderful person he is. This past November I was diagonsed with Gential Type 1 H, once past the initial shock, our life has been better than ever. Did I get it from him or was it in my system for a long time... does it really matter. What matter is that there is this wonderful, kind, gentle man in my life that makes me feel so very special. So don't give up on dating, you have a lot to offer someone you just need to put yourself out there and find each other.

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brokenwing

Hi... I'm new here, so please bear with me as I learn about the site. I read your post, and I understand how hard it is to share this kind of information with family members, and friends. There is definately a realistic concern with what others will assume, and how they will react when given sensitive information. Some will be understanding, and others.... well. We don't owe everyone all the intimate details of our lives (only those whom we hope for a romatic relationship with.) It would be wonderful, in my oppinion if we could just tell everyone, and be very open about our situations. However; though many people are compassioante, and open-minded... not everyone can, or should be trusted with all the details of our lives. Especially sensitive matters. Some people will be very supportive and understanding. The others? Well, if they don't understand, it's likey due to all the misinformation out there, and a lack of accurate information.

One day perhaps, there will be better and more accurate info out there, and the stigma attached to such matters will lessen. That is my hope, because so many feel alienated from others whom they feel "just won't understand".

It feels bad when we feel we are forced to keep secrets from those close to us, who may or may not understand, and who may rush to a poor conclusion.

Best of luck, and I hope sites like this one will help all of us to find acceptance, and given a chance to be seen for who we are, not what we have.

I have not yet told my children, or family members. I have shared with my best friend, and it was a positive experience in that case.

Hope this is in keeping with the rules for posting a reply? If not, I apologize. *Smile*

We are just regular people who

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goodpeople

Hi, I am new to this site. I have had Herpes 1 and 2 since my twenties now I am 52. I just had to make up a lame excuse why I could not date a fantastic guy because I was ashamed to tell him I was infected. I think he should know the truth but I am afraid of his rejection. I do not want to lose him as a friend. Should he have the right to know if we are friends and never date?

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