Help Me understand

[cramerb535]

Again, sorry for more than one post but you guys are great and supportive and it is helping me cope some . Anyway, I have read alot of conflicting information and I know this bugger is tricky but bear with me. So my current outbreak which I have to assume is my primary is bad. I have alot of sores mostly above my genitals which sucks because its near my waistline and boxers and pants irritate the area. I have a few on my penis but only two. It appeared 5 days ago and ill get me test results in a few days but the doc was sure I have it because my lymph nodes in the groin are swollen and for a few days had painful urination.

My questions are these. I have never noticed or identified any bumps, painful urination, swollen lymph nodes or anything before and I am really good at examining myself for other things anyways like lumps on testicles and such. Not to mention I like to keep the area well groomed and know those parts pretty well I guess. This outbreak hit me hard with flu like symptoms and everything else I mentioned and has only marginally improved although the sores have not subsided at all only the painful urination. This would make this my first outbreak more than likely correct? And if so that would mean my infection was recent correct? Until I get my results back my current girlfriend is holding off on a blood test. But either way almost all of the sites including the CDC state that incubation is up to 26 days prior to the PRIMARY outbreak. So this should, although not 100% but should indicate my outbreak is probably from my current girlfriend of six months?

I know I have had answers to a few other questions and were similar but I have done so much research in the last 24 hours I am just confused beyond belief. Thanks

[testingthewater]

I am on day 70 of my last contact.....and this is my first OB. I am a tad bit confused as well.

[norcallove]

Hi cramerb. First off, welcome to this site and I hope you start feeling better soon. As you stated in your post, this virus is very tricky. There really isn't a "typical" or "normal" about it. I had my first OB 4 months into my relationship and my bf is negative and I definitely did not cheat, so it is possible to have your first OB well after 26 days from when you get it. I wasn't with anyone for awhile before him as well. My doctor told me that this virus can lay dormant for years. After reading tons of stories on this site, my personal experience, and my research - I know this is true. I think that "typically" (although there really isn't a typical) people show symptoms 2-26 days after getting the virus, BUT that is not always the case. It can lay dormant for years. Plus, some people (actually most) are asymptomatic and never show symptoms. I hope this helps. I'm sure there are some other members who are more informative that can weigh in as well.

You could have got it from your gf, but it is really hard to say for sure. Even if she is positive, who is to say that you didn't give it to her. Unfortunately, herpes is not tested for in routine STD tests, even when you say test for everything. I found that out after my first OB! So either one of you could have had it and not known (most people are asymptomatic). Unless one of you was a virgin before (assuming its HSV2 and not HSV1, which would typically be from oral sex) or had a negative test for HSV before you got together, it tends to be tricky when trying to figure out who had it first. I hope you are just trying to figure out where you got it and not playing the blame game. Unfortunately, it can be tricky when you're trying to figure out where/when you got this virus.

It will all get easier in time. I was diagnosed at the end of November and I totally understand all of your confusion. There definitely is some conflicting information out there. This site helped me a lot though, so keep asking questions and read the links to the right. It really does get easier, it is just a lot to take in a first. Take care Hope this helped a bit.