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He Doesn't Care!!!!


1girl

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I met someone about 2 weeks ago and we hit it off....He is so amazing and I am really starting to like him. Things were starting to get intimate, so I knew I had to tell him about my H, but I was so nervous. I hated the thought of him possibly leaving when i told him. I was so nervous before I told him, but I finally bit the bullet and talked with him about it. You know what...he didn't care!! He said he likes me so much that he wants to work through it. I was so surprised I started to cry. I can't believe how lucky I am to have found this man. He is truly amazing. I have been rejected twice because of H.....it's so nice to have finally met someone who likes me for who I am....H and all. I hope everyone can find that someone someday!

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As truly amazing as he seems please make sure and make a date to have routine std testing done together so you will both know what you have on your plate.

I'm so glad you were able to tell him that you have herpes and that he was ok with it. It's great when we can find people that enjoy us for the person that we are in spite of what we have... ya know?

Angela :D

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  • 1 year later...

Thought i was that lucky too

Hi im new here and came across your post. You know i was in the same situation. My first experiance with telling someone i was dating did not got too well. Then i met someone who was pretty wonderful. We had known each other for 1year and 1/2. and finally i went on a date. after 2 weeks i we did kiss, and i hadnt told him. we kissed maybe 3 or 4 more times. we had been seeing each other 4 a month. And i told him, and he was wonderful. responded the same way.....It was amazing. We were coming up on 3months...5 days prier. He was very distant. Come to find out he found a cold sore in his mouth and freaked out. NOT what i expected. We work together and now he wont even look at me or talk to me. HURTS...he doesnt even know if it is hepres, but he is not really talking to me, he told me he was afraid and i asked what that meant he couldnt even give a straight answer. Anyway it just helps to talk about it. i really need some help

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Please don't have personal convo's at work

Hi im new here and came across your post. You know i was in the same situation. My first experiance with telling someone i was dating did not got too well. Then i met someone who was pretty wonderful. We had known each other for 1year and 1/2. and finally i went on a date. after 2 weeks i we did kiss, and i hadnt told him. we kissed maybe 3 or 4 more times. we had been seeing each other 4 a month. And i told him, and he was wonderful. responded the same way.....It was amazing. We were coming up on 3months...5 days prier. He was very distant. Come to find out he found a cold sore in his mouth and freaked out. NOT what i expected. We work together and now he wont even look at me or talk to me. HURTS...he doesnt even know if it is hepres, but he is not really talking to me, he told me he was afraid and i asked what that meant he couldnt even give a straight answer. Anyway it just helps to talk about it. i really need some help

I'm sure you know this but to reiterate that you should do it after work in a neutral private place outside of work and coworkers so the both of you can discuss the latest development. Cooler heads will make for a meaningful conversation. i wish you the best and I'm sorry that you are going thru this. Perhaps the both of you can go to a doctor that specializes in this so that the both of you can be armed with reliable information and perhaps find support resources during this challenging time.

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  • 3 weeks later...

1girl... I'm on the OTHER end myself. A girl I've been dating for almost 2 weeks told me this.

Oddly, I thought it was a "Dream" the first time as I was date-rape drugged (apparently, another thing to make life more difficult), which I told her I didn't remember much of anything that night. She told me for sure...

I respect her for doing so. So much, that I ended up on this site to see what to know about herpes. I'm still taking it in... and it has me concerned... 80% of the population infected?

Thats a high probability when there is so much interaction with others since the time we are born.

Send your BF to this site, perhaps or simply link to the info pages about prevention. I am still learning and thinking.

I wish you luck

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Ok everyone, it's finally my turn. I met someone very special and I know soon I will have to tell him about my H. I am not looking forward to this, :confused:but I am going to tell him because i want this realationship to work out. I will keep everyone posted on this. He appear to be an understanding man.:rolleyes:

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1Girl : It is a wonderful thing when we can find people in this world that aren't close minded and are open to that we are great people regardless of our issue.

Sillyface: I'm so sorry he is acting like this. I hope you have been able to sit down and speak with him. Ifyou told him and he continued then he put himself at risk and shouldn't be an @ss towards you for his decisions. Hopefully he is just in shock as most of us are when we are diagnosed and things will be okay.

DTex: I hope coming to this site has helped with your understandings and realizing it isn't the end of the world. I too was raped and contracted this. Doesn't mean that you will, but I wasn't to sure if you were diagnosed or just concerned. I'm sorry you had to go through that.

Smiley: Can't wait to see how things go. I hope and pray that he accepts everything and you have found a wonderful guy and will have an amazing relationship

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Hope my situation ends up with a smile

:)Its so helpful coming onto this site and seeing things work out between couples.. I am so scared to tell my partner of 1 month that I have genital H. I dont even know how to start the conversation.. any advice to me! I would appreciate it...

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I had the same struggle as you guys: I was single for a while and met this great guy about three months ago. We were totally making out when I told him and he showed me great support. I am very scared that I get him infected with H, but I am on Valtrex and we do have unprotected sex. He mentioned that he knows about the risks and is willig to take them. I can see myself with him and trust him like I have never trusted anybody, plus he makes me very comfortable and says that my H is not a big deal (for him, even though it is huuuge for me). At one point, I thought really that I could never ever tell anybody, the fear of being rejected.

What I found out really helps is to have the talk with a good friend. I picked two of my good girl friends and sat down with them and put myself into the situation as I would tell my boyfriend. Sure it is different but to verbalize it in front of somebody makes you really find the right words.

I am still struggeling with being infected, I found out shortly after I found out that my (then) boyfriend had cheated on me and he is the cause why I have H now. I hate him for it and I cannot even explain how much hatred and disgust I feel for this guy. I just want to spit in his face and embarass him in front of the whole world. He thinks he is such a stud and such a great looking guy but he has nothing to offer except for his great looks and believe me ... they fade!

Down the road, I might get a Voodoo doll and let it all out on it...

Myrah

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Yup I hear yah on the Cheating part, and the good looking ones. Thats all they have. That will fade.

Thanx for the advice, I am really struggling this time. Maybe because i really like this guy. It just doesnt seem to get any easier. I hate feeling so scared. It seems though most people dont get rejected. There just never seems to be a good time. Thanx

;)

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  • 3 weeks later...

Im happy for you! I have been seeing a guy for about a month and decided before I fell for him anymore I should tell him incase he chose to leave me. For about a day he was jsut speechless and wasn't sure what to do. He thought he either had to leave me and be clean or stay with me and get herpes. Once I explained to him that if we are safe when the time comes he most likely wont get it. He said he wants to stay together and see what develops. Part of me is sooo happy but the other part thinks that he is just waiting to break up with me later so he doesn't seem like a jerk. He is an amazing guy and seems understand. I hope he is as supportive and understanding as your guy!

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I agree Katie that is how I do things. Tell them right off the bat so if they run I don't have a lot of time and feelings invested in it. SO FAR SO GOOD FOR ME!!

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