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Stupid Girl...


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Hi all...I apologize in advance if this is a long post & thank anyone in advance who can offer opinions or insights...

About 6 weeks ago, I spent a passionate weekend with a guy I had been chatting online with for about 3 months. Here comes the stupid part. The day before we met in person on this incredible weekend, he tells me over messenger that he sort of knew we would be sleeping together eventually (the attraction was incredible), so he went to his doctor to get checked head to toe for any STDs. His test for HSV2 came back possitive. I think he thought I would run when he told me, but I insisted on seeing him anyway. Against either of our better judgement, we had sex on Saturday night & then I drove to his house the next day and we had sex twice again. The ladder being quite rough cotact (lots of friction), and lots of mutual oral sex.

After a few days, I began to rethink things (head coming out of the clouds), and decided not to sleep with him until I was sure where the relationship was going, and then go about it very carefully, if at all. I went to see my doctor about 2 weeks later to get tested for all STDs and was very worried I had already contracted HSV2 from my friend. He is asymptomatic and has no signs whatsoever.

The nurse called me the day before New Year's Eve and told me that my pap smear had came back for bacteria and I should take the prescription that my doctor had given me after the holidays (Metro-Gel). Then she told me that I had been exposed to Herpes. She told me I would probably have an outbreak and that I should call in for a prescription when I did. I was devastated. She didn't give me any further information and I did not know what to ask, but then spent the weekend doing reasearch (that I should have done BEFORE I slept with this man...GRRR).

On New Year's Eve, I started showing signs of an outbreak. My vulva turned angry red and raised higher than my other skin (swelling), and almost had a "thickness" feeling. I got a few little red bumps along beside of my lips that never did blister or look like the photos of Herpes that I've seen. I did not feel sick like the flu. It felt itchy/burning, much like a yeast infection, but different somehow.

My doctor's office was closed for the holidays, and I wasn't even sure it was an outbreak because of the vaginitis, but on Tuesday I called for the nurse and demanded to be on the Valtrex. I asked to be put on it full time to lessen the chances of passing it on (which is what I worry about the most). She spoke with the doctor and he left a message saying he would call in an episode's worth, but as suppressive therapy, he was not sure.

He called me back later that day to explain to me that I had been exposed to HSV1 as a child. Those were the antibodies they found. He says it is unlikely that I would contract HSV2 and that I might not have it. He asked me if I had ever had coldsores as a child and I have not...not ever. My older sister did, however, and she practically raised me. My symptoms are subsiding now (7 days later). I am finished with the Metro-Gel, and my doctor suggested applying antibiotic ointment topically because my symptoms could be something else. I have done this and noticed some relief within the first day. I also am on day 3 of the Valtrex, however the patient info leaflet says you must start the Valtrex within 72 hours of an OB for it to be most effective.

I can't get an appointment until next week for further tests and am on information overload from the net. Does anyone have any thoughts on my situation?

I have also recently met a wonderful man, with whom I can definately see a relationship (possibly longterm...it's too soon to say). I have already told him and he was wonderful about it and is being very supportive, although I am having a hard time thinking of how I would ever be able put him at risk.

Thanks so much for your time...Colleen

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Well hun we've all made mistakes.All you can do is learn more about herpes and make sure you tell any possible partners that you have it.

Since I have herpes I've decided that when I tell a possible partner I will also help them learn more about it befor they sleep with me so they know what the risks are.

If I didn't have herpes and a new bf told me he had it or any other STD I wouldn't sleep with until I had educated myslef about it first and of course gotten to know him better.

Herpes can be passed by any kind of sex.I mean it doesn't matter if it's nice gentle sex or crazy rough sex.It also doesn't matter if there is an orgasam or not Herpes and other STD's can still be passed.

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Thank you for answering my post. I totally agree that it's not just a matter of telling someone, but making sure they are making an informed decision on continuing in a relationship.

After all the research I have done, I do believe in fact I am on the end of an OB. My hope will be from here that my OBs will be mild and few due to the HV1 antibodies I have. This OB was not that bad or painful, and they are supposed to get even easier over time.

I have also since learned that my new friend has already been exposed to HSV1, as well. I will be taking lots of time to get to know him first...researching together, and will be asking him to take all STD tests before we decide to go any further.

Thanks again,


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