Lady, as you may already know, lots of things cause infections, such as medications, hormone imbalance, allergies, and stress. It might not be the sex but your body reacting to something else. Or even a combination of things. Maybe you are allergic to the condoms you are using. Stop taking everything for several months and when you do something differently, you can determine if your body has a reaction to it. Hope this helps.
@Jules31 is right. I pointed the finger at the guy who possibly gave it to me and he said he was clean as did every other guy that I have been with. I'm quite sure that very few people will admit to passing on herpes and if most people don't ever get tested for herpes and I have no symptoms it wouldn't even occur to them that they have it so of course will not admit to anything. I think if I knew I would just be angry and it still wouldn't change it. Gotta let sh1t go sometimes
Yeah if you use meds and condoms its low risk. They say fewer obs less viral shedding less risk. Hsv2 genital and oral hsv1 are highest. Really you can individual thing in terms of the person who is the carrier and the person who is taking the risk if they have a s*** immune system they might be more likely to catch it.