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happy valentines day


worried85

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i just found out on feb 14th that i have herpes. i have been dating my boyfriend for 8 1/2 months now. i have HPV, i was diagnosed w/ it 2 yrs ago. I have not had any signs of it since i had the surgery, and somehow [from my boyfriend] i have gotten herpes. He said he has had no signs of it but found 3 bumps on his penis. For the past 2 wks i have been in tremdous amounts of pain b/c the outbreak. How long could someone have herpes and not know it. Could he have gotten this before me or did he cheat on me...i'm so confused b/c most of these websites dont answer my ?'s. Im only 20 and now for the rest of my life i have to deal with this. Im confused on what i should do about him, end things or stay w/ him. i know thats something i will have to deal w/ but he gave this to me and i just need to hear from someone who knows and has experienced this.....

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What is the suppressive valtrex that everyone talks about, is it the same as valtrex. My doctor has just started me on the medications, she didnt tell me much about this, i guess she will get into more when i go back in. I'm so confused on this virus, for the past 2 wks i havent been able to do anything, laying in bed b/c the OB has been so bad, i had to quit my job, not go to school. I feel it is taking over my life right now, i know it will get better when the OB goes away but i feel like a train ran over me in the meantime.......... how long does this last?????

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It's going to last until it's done. Varies from person to person. My first OB was 6 weeks or more and before it had completely gone, another one came along. I've heard many people go from 1-3 weeks & the first outbreak is usually the worst.

Taking Valtrex as a suppressive therapy means you take a lower dose, but you take it every day, as apposed to just taking it for 3 days at the beginning of an outbreak. Supposed to help avoid future outbreaks and lower the risks of transmition.

Colleen

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o ok, well my doctor is making me take it for a year. This is the worst i have ever felt in my whole 20 yrs of living, even after surgeries and everything else i have been through. I have been in bed for 2 wks, fever, headaches, feeling like i have the flu. My b/f has no symptoms at all and has never had any symptoms other than 3 bumps and he says that it dont bother him, i wish i was in his shoes. Actually i wish i was never in these shoes. This was a Valentines Day i will never forget, my first valentine in my life and i get H. Thanx for responding!!!! i just wonder how hard this is going to be when i try to start dating again, reading some of these peoples stories makes me feel like i will never date again. This is soo hard for me, my bf, i dont think it has hit him yet or he is keeping it all in.......but i just have to study this more!!!! thanx again....

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Yaaa...I know how you feel about the dating thing...it is tough. Cross that bridge when you come to it. Concentrate on getting WELL now.

I'm so sorry you're having a really bad first OB. It sounds like to me that you didn't have any antibodies against H to begin with, or perhaps your immune system is compromised with something else. It does get better from here, but I know that's not much comfort for you now. *hugs*

Your best bet is to start working on your immune system right away. The healthier your immune system, the better you can fight H.

#1) GET OUT OF BED. Get excercise, no matter how crappy you feel, even if you can only manage to stumble around the house. Excercise is so important to the human body. I know it's easy to hover under the covers and pretend that life doesn't exist, but you have to fight that.

#2) Eat & eat healthy...even if you don't feel like it. There are many meal "alternatives", such as Ensure if you can't eat. VITAMINS are very important. Take a daily multiple and since you are a female, throw in some B6 (female energy) & some Vitamin E (straight advice from my GYN doc). Avoid grabbing a bag of chips because you are ill and feeling depressed and it's easy to open the bag!

#3) You are feeling sick...drink lots of good FLUIDS...The normal body water percentage for men is 50-65% and for women is 45-60%. Our bodies LOVE fluids...even when we are not thursty. Fluids help flush bad stuff from our bodies.

#4) Try to lower your stress levels! Quit obsessing over all this stuff you are reading. Consider it knowledge and move on...worry about other things later. The more you stress, the more your immune system will suffer. I know this for a fact, seeing that stress within my own personal life brought on another OB.

When you need to talk it out...I have found a SUPER chat site: http://www.herpes.com/chat.shtml I am there usually once a day & my user name is DianaColleen. You are also welcome to join my MSN messenger under colleen_who_cares@hotmail.com & I will look for you.

Hope this has helped in some way...Colleen

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o ok' date=' well my doctor is making me take it for a year. This is the worst i have ever felt in my whole 20 yrs of living, even after surgeries and everything else i have been through. I have been in bed for 2 wks, fever, headaches, feeling like i have the flu. My b/f has no symptoms at all and has never had any symptoms other than 3 bumps and he says that it dont bother him, i wish i was in his shoes. Actually i wish i was never in these shoes. This was a Valentines Day i will never forget, my first valentine in my life and i get H. Thanx for responding!!!! i just wonder how hard this is going to be when i try to start dating again, reading some of these peoples stories makes me feel like i will never date again. This is soo hard for me, my bf, i dont think it has hit him yet or he is keeping it all in.......but i just have to study this more!!!! thanx again....[/quote']

A persons response to the virus relates to how well their DNA meshes with it. Its just like people who died of the great influenza virus of 1918 and the other people who had no symptoms to it. The best thing to do is be as healthy as possible and avoid as much stress as possible. Eat right, work out and live right. Viruses are opportunistic and a run down unhealthy body will be perfect breeding ground for future viral attacks. Eventually over time your body will develop a better immunity to it.

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  • 1 month later...

I just got through feeling like that....it really is the worse feeling in the world, but now that I'm past it, things seem a lot clearer and i only have hsv 1!!!!!

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    • WilsoInAus
      I really suggest that the best thing is for both you and your boyfriend to obtain the Westernblot HSV test. He has a 50%+ chance of being positive and you have a 50%+ chance of being negative. Only the Westernblot can sort this out for you.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @kpn the first thing to note is that it is all OK to have HSV-1 or indeed any HSV type. It is not negligence, it is just being human. Oral HSV-1 is not an STD in the sense that the primary transmission is non sexual and the majority of it occurs between parents to children. If any of your children contracted HSV, you would know it. It wouldn't be a silent infection for children. HSV-2 tends not to shed from the oral region for people who have it there in any event. At age 73, about 80% of the population has HSV-1. There is no reason to believe that your mother isn't one of those people. About half of all carriers of oral HSV-1 do not realise they have it and have no living memory of cold sores as they were infected when very young. The most logical explanation is that your mother has oral HSV-1 from her childhood and that your daughter doesn't have oral HSV. Not that it is relevant to anyone but yourself, but your wife might find she actually has genital HSV-1 having had an untyped swab when she was diagnosed.
    • WilsoInAus
      Hi @Dylan86 and welcome to the website. First note that you cannot pragmatically become infected with HSV-1 from sharing a drink. If you carry HSV-1, it did not come from that episode. As such it is extremely unlikely HSV-1 is the primary cause of your issues. Can the WB miss a HSV-1 infection? Rarely but its feasible in less than 1% of carriers who test with WB. Note that the WB does not have values, it has positive or negative as you say. It is way more accurate than IgG as it looks for all 30+ antibodies that are in your blood for HSV. Could you have HSV-1? Yes it is feasible, but it would be a very old childhood infection. Could HSV-1 be causing your oral issues? No herpes will not cause the burning mouth syndrome you describe. Could some of the lesions be herpes related? It is feasible if you are a carrier. But it is unlikely to be the primary cause of the issues, but its an opportunistic virus that can cause issues when something else is taxing your immune system. The best thing you can do is the PCR test on a oral lesion and that will be pretty definitive. Either way, in summary. I'd suggest there is <1% chance you are part of about 70% of the population that has HSV-1. Further there is less than a 1% chance that herpes is the primary cause of your issues.   
    • kpn
      My wife has had hsv 2 for around 8 years. We have two young children 3 years old and 18 months old. My wife only had one outbreak when she was first infected so we didn't worry too much about passing it on to our children. I understand the risk to be pretty low under those circumstances. I don't believe my wife took antivirals during either pregnancy. My younger child has diaper rashes pretty often and has had what I thought was hand foot and mouth disease. That was going around the daycare a while back. I haven't really given it much concern though.  About a week ago, my mother kissed my youngest on the lips. My kid was congested at the time but they pretty much always are. About 3 days later, my mother developed a cold sore on her mouth. She has never had cold sores in her life and she is 73 and happily married so she is not going around messing with anyone. She pointed to the fact she had kissed my youngest and presumed that is where she was infected. At first I said that's not possible since my child has never had any cold sores but since then I have really started to consider that maybe it is possible she contracted it from my daughter. This has me worried that my daughter does indeed have hsv2 and was shedding in her mouth. Does anyone have any experience with this? I am really losing sleep about this. Two people I care so much about got hsv from my negligence. I am fine if I were to contract it, I am not worried about what others think at this point in my life. I just don't want anyone else to have it. 
    • CHT
      Hello DavidGua.... based on the two pictures, I'm not seeing anything that resembles a typical herpes outbreak.  I am not sure what those spots are on your penis.  Please have a doctor take a look and I'm sure you'll get a proper diagnosis.  Have you ever received an HSV antibody test (IgG)?  Again, I doubt your symptoms are herpes-related but, if you'd like some peace of mind, you could request the IgG antibody test for HSV2.   Best of luck.... let us know if you have any other questions/concerns.
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