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Heartbroken and severely depressed


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For those who dont know the first half of my story read:


Now for the update: He broke it off with me

Whats worse? He broke it off with me on the phone

Need more? He borke it off with me on the phone AT WORK!

He said that he was tired of sneaking around behind his friends backs to date me. I told him then he shouldnt sneak around and he should stand up for me. But he just feels like it isnt going to work and he wants to date someone that his friends accept. I explained to him that im willing to get to know his friends and accept them -- ive even offered numerous times to get together wilth all them so they can get to know me -- but it just seemed like he didnt want to hear it and his mind was made up.

I did the only thing I knew to do: I called him a coward and yelled and then told him to "stay the fuck away from me" and hung up the phone. Didnt really make me feel any better.

Im just heartbroken, miserable, depressed, crying ... im not dealing very well with this. any help? anyone?

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You are good to be done with him... although it hurts now... it is for the better.... the person you end up with needs to be a MAN and defend you to his friends... not a big ole woosey.... you will find someone that way.... just give yourself time..

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This is not lip service. I call it as I see it. You are too good for him. You did leave the door open for the criticism by not telling before sex, but you have learned a valuable lesson in that, I am certain.

He violated you by informing his friends of your status and in letting them know you had been intimate before he knew about the herpes. In short, he set you up to be ostracized. Subconsciously, he was getting even. But, he came back again, because you had something special. You are special. Now, he had to deal with peer pressure. He isn't mature enough to do that and backed away.

Yes, you are hurt and angry. Anyone would be. But, step back from this for at least two weeks and look at the bigger picture. He isn't the right man for you. When the right one comes along, he'll want to protect you just as much as you'll want to protect him. Value yourself. Nothing has changed about the essence of you. You have a common virus that 1 in 4 people have! That's a lot of people. It poses no risk (aside from precautions in pregnancy and some immune deficiency disorders) with 90% of those who have it never even having symptoms they recognize! If you get them, they are limited to some annoying little blisters every once in awhile. Odds are good that some of the roomies have it too, just haven't been diagnosed. So, put that in perspective and hold your head up high.

Take it one day at a time.

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Hold up -- I feel the need to clarify something.

I was 100% honest in telling him what I had BEFORE we had sex. His roomate, lied to his girlfriend, and told her that I didnt. You read the previous post wrong.

I would never expose someone without telling.

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You deserve better. Sorry any man (or woman) who picks their friends over someone they are supposed to love isn't A REAL MAN. Not worth your time. You deserve so much better.

Good luck.

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last night I went out with the guy I date to a party at his friends house... most know I have herpes... partially because i am open about it.... and talk to people about STD awareness... it seems to be the convo I get into with people... they are all cool with it.. but they watch him share food and drinks with me (you and I know you can't get it that way, but the uneducated don't always know)... and know that he is cool with it... he would be gone in a heartbeat if it wasn't that way....

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  • 1 month later...

he's a punk ass chicken shit coward. What man picks his friends over his partner? and would you really want to deal with all these anoying shallow people for the rest of your life? screw them all. they probably all have herpes too, we all know the stats here. This probably all feels terrible now but at least your time is freed up so you can meet some decent people.

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Believe me sister you are SO MUCH BETTER OFF WITHOUT this coward. Just consider this: thank GOD you learned now what a little weasel he is than later on...like 10 years from now and after you have invested all your time and energy into this big baby!!!

He did like you, that I am sure of, but he sounds like a panty girl! First he should have NEVER told his friends you have HSV. Second, he should have stood up for you to them. Had he done that initially, like a MAN, they would have never belittled you or put you down. He wouldn't have to "sneak around' to see you. (that is the other thing that is galling to me too...he made you feel that you had to sneak around to see him. What a schmuck.)

I know you are hurt now. But trust me, it will get better and you WILL be happier without him. Like the other post stated: would you really want to deal with such a wimp as well as his shallow, cruel, DELUSIONAL friends? I think not.

Hold your chin up high. You will be fine. There is someone out there for you who will treat you like gold and love you the way you deserve to be loved. And more importantly, RESPECT you.

Take care and keep us posted on how you feel . Believe me, I have my up and down days too....all the time. (today has been a semidown day and what helps me cope is helping others!) :wink:

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