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+30 years and counting

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I was diagnosed with HSV-2 when I was around 22-23 years old, I am about to turn 53. I honestly did not understand what the skin doctor was telling me, "you have herpes, and it is very contagious" is all i remember. I was confused, mystified and then in utter despair when reality sank in. The gal i got it from I never saw again and the time spent together was a beer soaked memory. As long as i was not in a relationship, I did not have to think about it. I worked a lot, drank a lot and kept to myself about this "problem". Serious relationships finally came around, my nerves caused more OB's and I was so mentally devestated, i finally shared my secret with the mindset that the relationship was not worth having anyhow. My partner turned around and said "that's it? that is what you are so scared to tell me?" She was ready to share her life with me anyway, but in just a few short months i sabatoged the relationship anyway by my alcohol and drug abuse. 5 years after that I got clean and sober, been that way for 19 years, continuous. Married to a fine woman, she is fully aware of my HSV2 and sobriety and loves me as i am. I am a lucky man. Now, as for me, mentally HSV2 has never gone away, it is controlled by acyclovir 200 mg, daily. Occasional flare up once a year. I stay sober, healthy, active and live my life as best i can-I realize i cannot change herpes, but it definately can impact my world if i let it. In hindsight, i internalized this disease, poured alcohol and drugs on it and became angry, bitter and lost. Sober, I can handle most of life on life's terms, yet this diseaes I still need to talk out with another human that knows what it is I am feeling and saying. This part is missing in my life and I now realize it is a bigger secret than anything. I found this website and am looking to join a support group. i would rather meet another human being than type out words, so if anyone knows of a support group in existance on Long island that meets, please let me know. Hope this helps someone, it definately feels good to release some feelings out about this personal secret that I hide away from the outside world, along with unconscious thoughts I have.:p

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There are three sites you need to check out that are NY based support groups:




or call Long Island Help (516) 361-9338

Come to the "Chat Room" There you will meet many nice fellow Herpsters who can offer you their support.

Good luck!


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thanks for the info JB. I tried calling the LI Help line, but it seems to disconnect. At any rate I will be attending a support group in NYC. Having a support network for this ailment is important to have peace of mind.

Thanks for the info...

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  • The Hive is Thriving!

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    • North Saranac
      I have not had sexual contact for at least half a year with a partner of more than four years monogamous, one non-protected encounter four years ago different women and then a few more non-protected over ten years ago.   One morning, I woke up after a having bad night time sweats (common) with a bad itch in my pubic region hair on right side about halfway between my penis and belly button. I did not look closely to later that night and noticed a large red rash, but don't believe I looked that closely. At some point I noticed a blister or something and tried to pop it and then walked away, I think being in denial I didn't want to look that closely, so I cant describe symptoms. This was on a Saturday or Sunday. The following Monday I went to work, where I do a physical demanding job al week, I noticed the area that had the rash showed about four areas that were infected (either cut or blistered) and would burn at night time during the week, They were located on my right side, directly where my belt buckle rubs. During the days that work week, my belt buckle would drive and rub in the area ( my buckle is metal square with pointy but not sharpe edges), I tried to pull my pants up and get the belt off the area but that was not always possible. After work that week, I took the weekend and then next two days off of work, the shooting pain evidently stopped and the area after a another week or two looked to be healing.  Week before symptoms: I have been under stress at work and the previous two days before the rash / OB I was working on a boat with another person, we were sharing work equipment and peeing with out washing hands (could he have had it and spread it to me through sharing of phones, equipment if he peed and then touch my phone, then I peed (sorry if stupid question)? My belt could have also been digging into me also, I have been wearing this belt for over a year and never had a problem. Currently, I took a Herpes 1 and 2 test from stdcheck using quest and it came back negative. Symptoms Dec 2/3 test Jan 21, negative results Jan 23. The area in pubic region is still red and appears to be scared but no open sores.   I know it is crazy but with the those symptoms I am still worried. Was that too soon to get a test? Is there any chance of getting if from a co-worker if they have it and touched the same things you did? Would you recommend getting another blood test in 3 months? Thank you for your input.
    • T9000
      Doctors will tell you this, but it's incredibly irresponsible of them, and it's advice that needs to be ignored. You always need to disclose your status before having sex with someone.
    • T9000
      The general public is just really poorly educated when it comes to virology in my opinion. Part of it though is just the fact that there's only so much information a person can remember and care about at one time. However I've always felt like HPV is way more openly discussed than HSV, at least in women's spaces.
    • Forest
      Here is the full science and documentation behind the herpes patent . RNA GUIDED ERADICATION OF HERPES SIMPLEX TYPE I AND OTHER RELATED HERPESVIRUSES   https://patents.justia.com/patent/20180000970   I hope this will help answer your questions.
    • T9000
      The fact that there are so many people contracting hsv-1 genitally from as little as one sexual encounter leads me to believe that it likely more 'tuned' to the genital region than medicine realizes.

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