Jump to content
World's Largest Herpes Support Group
Sign in to follow this  
Movingslowly

Speechless but so many words

Recommended Posts

Movingslowly

I think about how and when I contracted this virus. Obviously, it was with a person who is asymptomatic. My fiance could have possibly gave me this virus, but if so he is asymptomatic to the virus because he has never had an outbreak. It doesn't seem to bother him, but everyday I feel like if it wasn't him who gave me the virus then he deserves to be with someone who is free of this virus. I feel like I don't deserve anyone. It literally has destroyed my life. Then other days I think about all the successful researches that are in the making the drastically lower the transmission risks/suppress the virus, and I feel better. Like, there is hope for us who are infected. I'm the type of person who has poured my heart and soul in every relationship I've ever been in. I treat my friends like family. I'm a dedicated employee to my job. I'm educated and working on my masters. Soon to marry (with a sense of worthlessness within myself). I've never been the type of person to sleep around. I've only had a few partners and used protection with each of them besides three because of long-term commitment. I honestly have never met someone as caring as myself. Then some how this comes along and destroys my confidence and desire to achieve anything in life. Then once again I keep relying on research to make my life easier. I believe there will one day be a permanent suppression therapy, but I don't wanna live taking a pill everyday. Like, I need the reminder I have H. I've been to hell and back and I have the stories to prove it, but damn what did I ever do to deserve something like this??? I feel for those who are single trying to find love. It just kills me that having H makes people stray away from you, but if you have cancer you could find love easily. Theres no real stigma with having cancer, but Lord forbid if you have H. Somedays are better than others, but I still pray to God that research can lead to suppression of the virus. Something so little, but weighs more than elephant. Not a single day or night goes by without me thinking about how I'm infected with H. Once again maybe the future holds a cure/suppression.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Bright Side

I'm the same way. I've been in serious relationships only. Never had random sex and have poured my heart and soul into every relationship. I even have my Master's :) If there were a pill I could take everyday and not give this to a partner I would be content.

You should have your fiancee get tested then you'll know if you guys should be taking precautions or not.

It's very hard trying to understand why people like us have this and seemingly people who have lots of casual sex don't have it. It's very unfair and pretty infuriating. I am pretty obsessed with this...especially because I am single.

Just be grateful you have a fiancee that loves you in spite of this!!! Hang on to that and distract yourself with other things, you're lucky that you have him!!!

Feel better...talking to people helps me so shoot me a message if you like.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Movingslowly

I didn't have my first outbreak until about a month or so after not using protection with my fiance. It was all so strange. I still can't pinpoint it on him because we know this virus presents itself differently within each individual. We haven't used protection in so long, that it would be difficult for us to start now. I take anti-virals, but it's not that effective to be honest. I'm praying that one of these therapeutic vaccines come to market in the next few years. Especially, Genocea because they are working on a therapeutic vaccine and a preventative vaccine. Who knows what the results will reveal although the therapeutic vaccine is in the early stages of human clinical trials. If my fiance and I ever split-up I would never date another person again. No matter how much you try to prevent someone from contracting this virus, there is still the risk of giving it to someone else. I would never put someone in a situation like that. I know if I was H free, I would never date someone who has H knowing he has it. I'm highly educated about STI's and it kills me to think of how and when I contracted this virus.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  

Advertisement

Try a Lysine supplement for cold sores

  • The Hive is Thriving!

    • Total Topics
      67,965
    • Total Posts
      453,209
  • Posts

    • WilsoInAus
      No it’s not a fact at all. How can it be a correlation if it happens no more than chance? Remember 70-80% of people using PW have herpes.
    • BeautyLover321
      Hello! Thanks so much for your reply. I was told (and believe) I have HSV 2. They told me that on the phone; it was confirmed through swab. I have never taken a blood test or been tested for it otherwise. I've read mixed reviews about HSV1 providing protection-- because some studies seem to allude that it does. If this is true- it makes sense because I never had chicken pox or HSV1 in my entire life so I think it explains why I caught HSV2 from a one night experience (just my luck and just my own theory) Although I still experience twitching in my body -- I feel happy that the valtrex every other day suppresses it. But I do wonder, because I'm experiencing such reduced symptoms; if my shedding is reduced too. I doubt it but just a thought.  Anyways - I can live with condoms but I don't want to.. so I'm hoping for some guidance
    • MikeHerp
      This is no great surprise that HSV is pushed back in ExcisionBio's pipeline.  I'd be surprised if it isn't pushed back again. The chart they put out is painfully uninformative.  Sloppy.  And that's a red flag in and of itself. My guess is that those arrows are progress rather than efficiency, but it's not completely clear.  But if a scientific company can't get this chart right, then I really wonder what other mistakes they are making. I don't have a ton of confidence in this.  But we'll see.  I'm glad that it seems they are trying to do something.  I think CRISPR could be a solution to HSV (some kind of solution).  But I question whether it will be ExcisionBio that makes it in the end.  
    • MikeHerp
      Good to know.  I don't think this is a listed company, but from what I've read, they've gotten decent funding.  Around $70 million.  Most of that probably won't go to HSV research, but it's good they have some money. By comparison, ExcisionBio has raised $10 million.
    • MikeHerp
      The fact that Admedus is farming this out, kind of tells you it's a long shot at best.  It's good that it hasn't been abandoned.  But I'm doubtful much will come of this.  But maybe new knowledge about what doesn't work will come, and that's always helpful.
×

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.