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Maria93

People n my college class joking about herpes.

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Maria93

Okay so I walk into class and this guy goes "What's wrong with you?" Because I was sniffling and stuff. I said "I'm sick." He said whoa and backed away.. and this other guy was like "Hahaha dude, she just has a cold and your acting like she has herpes hahaha." I didn't say anything and then they continued on about the herpes talk.. They were saying they don't like going to the bathroom and touching water faucets because of people who have herpes and they went on about how disgusting herpes is and gross and how if they knew someone had it they wouldn't even touch them. They don't know I have it... All I said was that you can't get herpes like that... Did you not get educated in health class y'all are acting like it's the plague chill out. They never would've guessed I in fact have it. It makes me sad and depressed. I wish people didn't feel this way...:(

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Movingslowly

What's sad is they'll be the ones who carry the virus and never know. Then they'll be carries who spread it to others. It appears they have little to no education about herpes. I'm sure if they were tested they would come back positive for HSV1 and who knows they might be surprised to find out they carry HSV2.

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SMZ87

It makes me incredibly sad that people have this attitude toward herpes. You should have told them that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 5 men in the United States has herpes. You should also have said "cold sores" are herpes and chicken pox, shingles, and mono share similarities to the herpes virus. I also agree with movingslowly; their ignorance will probably cause them to contract/spread the virus.

I mentioned this in another thread, but I wonder why people have this horribly negative attitude about herpes? Some people say it's because of an ad campaign from the '70s that talked about how bad the virus is. Why don't people have this attitude toward genital warts? That causes cancer in both men and women. I know people who have it, and they don't feel nearly as stigmatized. To them, it's not even all that bad. Some even think they can't spread it if warts aren't there.

One woman is in the hospital with cervical cancer and was not doing well last I heard. If she doesn't make it, she will leave behind two little kids.

There is no test for HPV in men unless they have visible warts. That's a lot scarier to me than herpes ever could be.

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Maria93

I know. I just wish it wasn't so stigmatized. When the guy said "You're treating her like she has herpes all she has is a cold." My heart sunk... Because I do have herpes. It's really not that bad.. I mean it is very irritating but it doesn't do much it's like acne pretty much but people act like it will kill them and it's the most disgusting thing on planet earth. It really gets me down when I know people feel this way. Also, I never here jokes about genital warts, HIV, Chlamydia, but I always hear herpes jokes... I feel I'm the only one in my college with herpes and it really gets me down.

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Kitty123
I know. I just wish it wasn't so stigmatized. When the guy said "You're treating her like she has herpes all she has is a cold." My heart sunk... Because I do have herpes. It's really not that bad.. I mean it is very irritating but it doesn't do much it's like acne pretty much but people act like it will kill them and it's the most disgusting thing on planet earth. It really gets me down when I know people feel this way. Also, I never here jokes about genital warts, HIV, Chlamydia, but I always hear herpes jokes... I feel I'm the only one in my college with herpes and it really gets me down.

Trust me darling. I can almost bet my entire life savings that you aren't the only one in college with Herpes. There are many others out there just like you who feel the exact same way you do :)

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Msthing

SMZ87 I have HPV that I was diagnosed with when I was only 20 and got it the first time I had sex and that first time was also taken from me. I was just as devastated when I was 20 with HPV as I am now with HSV2. I think you are correct that the stigma is not as great but it is definatly still there. HPV is less painful and if you only have the one break out or none (cause most people don't ever get physical warts) it is very easy to forget about and be in denial about. I personally don't think HPV is better or worse that HSV its just different.

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pink21b

I understand how you feel. Its funny I use to talk like them and say I would never talk to a man that has it, not knowing everything about it. Now I have it and when I hear my family or friends make jokes or talk about it in a bad way it also makes me feel bad. I hate how people thinks its funny when people out here are hurting, sad and sometimes dont want to live.. It would be nice if there were more commericals and ads about how 1-4 woman have it and its out there and not put a bad name to it..

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cold beah

i would tell them that they are lucky they dont use the faucets because i rub my dick on them when im done washing my hands

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Movingslowly

Almost every female I met who has a form of hpv that causes genital warts got the warts on their cervix. That never stopped any of them from dating around. Its as if they think its not contagious. Hpv is different in the terms thr body can rid itself of the virus on the yrs. Its like theirs no cure for it as well, but the body can defeat easier than hsv. I know an older lady who contracted genital warts over 30yrs ago and she had one treatment to remove them off her cervix and had never grown back. Actually, her pap smears are negative for hpv now. She has been remarried for several years and her husband never grew warts. So, I honestly believe the stigma and discomfort around herpes is far worse. Although some people have to have their warts removed frequently and dont ever escape that discomfort.

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jazzlover08

Hey there MAria18. You're not the only one in college with it. I was diagnosed with it this past June with it. I was in the middle of my grad applications when I first experienced symptoms. The ARNP at my school's clinic helped me through the beginning of it. The guy I had been seeing at the time disppeared on me when I told him about it, further devastating me. I felt so alone and horrible on the inside. It was as if a piece of me died on the inside. The NP who diagnosed me was my anchor throughout my initial reaction. She encouraged me that there is life outside to herpes and told me to apply for schools that I should never let herpes defer my aspirations. Without her I would had never had the strength to take the GRE"s or even apply for grad schools. Because of her efforts I have an interview at a school this Monday.

Guys, especially college aged ones, can be horrible about joking about. The guy I had been seeing. Ignored me for nearly 2 weeks after I told him. In the end I had to drive to his place and force to talk to me so he could understand what was going on since he may have it as well. Luckily we are still friends through. His roommates joke about STI's and herpes all the time and it does make me very uncomfortable. You just have to take it stride and remind yourself that you're going to be OK. I always tell myself that I could have caught something worse.

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all around good guy

I know what you mean. There are all sorts of herpes jokes everywhere. Hell, I just watched 2 movies, and they both had herpes jokes in them. Back to freaking back. I dont know why there are so many jokes about it and not many about other stds, all herpes is is a skin virus. Can be uncomfortable from time to time, but no usual serious health problems. We should pool our money together and get an ad campaign going talking about it. It would help lessen the stigma and it would help people from spreading it because people would be informed.

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goodgirlslifegonewrong

Seriously people need to understand that yes the way it is transmitted can be looked at in a bad light by some BUT the disease itself is not very freaking far from acne it's just a little more annoying and in a differant location! I don't understand the stigma and why people who make those jokes don't realize that they are the ones who cause like 75% of the pain in people who do have it. Due to that fact that ignorant fools like that make us the butt of every nonentertaining joke.

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rosalie

Oddly, maybe because I have a background in health and medicine, I never had a stigma about herpes. When I learned I had it, I was like, okay, so I take lysine and hope I'm one of the asymptomatic ones. Cool beans. I kinda thought we all had one form or another of it and it could start being active at any time. I mean, who hasn't kissed at least 1 person? You have, what, an 80% chance of getting HSVI? So I thought we all carried the darn thing and it was a matter of luck if you had outbreaks. The truth is, I didn't have all the facts straight until I got diagnosed and did some in depth research, but if a man I was in love with had told me he had herpes when I was negative, it would not have deterred me one bit. I just didn't have that stigma.

I only started feeling crappy about myself when I realized that other people have this weird idea that herpes is somehow dirty or gross.

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rosalie

And further more, why is herpes a SEXUALLY transmitted disease, but cold sores are not a KISSING transmitted disease? And the flu should be, what, a breathing transmitted disease? We only say how a disease is transmitted if sex is in the picture. Dumb if you ask me.

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vballgirl
:( im sorry this happened. For me, this is one of the hardest parts about having herpes, hearing people, even your own friends, joke about it. The subject gets brought up on tv, in class, everywhere! I feel like crying every time, and do after, but i will never let them see because i never want anyone to find out...

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all around good guy

Hell, I just read playboy (yes, I DO read the articles) and I saw 2 herpes references that were negative, not just talking about it.

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Maria93

I think this stigma needs to stop soon or I'm going to lose my mind. Yesterday at school, people were yet AGAIN talking about herpes. They were like "Eww imagine how many people here have herpes and stuff and no one knows." And this other girl said that she thinks everyone who has herpes needs to tell anyone they're around in case it transfers... She said especially if they stay the night at her house... Not sleep with her just stay the night..No one knows I have it. I swear I'm getting so incredibly sick of this stigma. It seriously makes me feel like less of a person, or that I'm not good enough. I used to have so much confidence. I'm smart, pretty, and I'm a fun person to be around, but this stigma has gotten the best of me and now I feel like I have a huge sign that screams "HERPES" on my forehead. :( I don't like complaining, I know it could be so much worse I really do, but I also know how much better it could be....

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cat333
i would tell them that they are lucky they dont use the faucets because i rub my dick on them when im done washing my hands

HAHAHAHAHA thanks for the laugh :)

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summer lovin

Girl I know exactly how you feel... its no fun at all... I never thought I'd get herpes... but I did...it makes u feel so low:( but we can get through this....it makes u a stronger person

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Movingslowly

I remember looking at my coworker saying howa person we know is having major health issues and his response was, "yeah, he could have herpes". In his eyes having herpes is worse than having health problems so severe it could kill that person. Sad thing about it I kinda agree with him. Here I am infected with both strains.

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Melissa391

Hey,

I like you am a college student. It angers me when i think of people who are so naive and oblivious to how common all these STDs are... but i was one of them before becoming diagnosed first with HPV a year ago and then a few months ago i was diagnosed with Herpes. The fact is herpes is not talked about in the media, there are little to no advertising, people ignore it. Which is insane because every day more and more people are joining these sites. HPV only recently started having commercials and pamphlets informing people about it(within the past few years). It is now mandatory for girls in the 6th grade to become vaccinated with gardilsil, which protects against four types of hpv... I have high hopes something will change with regards to herpes-either a vaccine will become available or they will find a cure. Something has to give.

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Vidhya
I think this stigma needs to stop soon or I'm going to lose my mind. Yesterday at school, people were yet AGAIN talking about herpes. They were like "Eww imagine how many people here have herpes and stuff and no one knows." And this other girl said that she thinks everyone who has herpes needs to tell anyone they're around in case it transfers... She said especially if they stay the night at her house... Not sleep with her just stay the night..No one knows I have it. I swear I'm getting so incredibly sick of this stigma. It seriously makes me feel like less of a person, or that I'm not good enough. I used to have so much confidence. I'm smart, pretty, and I'm a fun person to be around, but this stigma has gotten the best of me and now I feel like I have a huge sign that screams "HERPES" on my forehead. :( I don't like complaining, I know it could be so much worse I really do, but I also know how much better it could be....

I live in Europe, and as I've written before, this whole stigma thing with Herpes in the US, the jokes, the suffering, shame and torture people go through, the aggressive "medical" sites scaring you into taking "daily Valtrex right now!", it all looks like science fiction to me. Down here its a private medical condition, unfortunate but no so serious. People don't talk about it usually, let alone make jokes. You have this forum now, and I wonder how can people do anything to expose this and put an end to this torture. In such a big and powerful country surely someone would have thought of ads an campaigns to make people understand this suffering and help destigmatize the condition? I really dont understand how could this have been allowed to go on for so long. And I fear this unique American phenomenon will spread to other places through the Internet and take the stigma to places where it does not exist, yet. (Australia is already becoming like this, apparently).

Interestingly, as the Herpes Viruses Association from the UK mentions in its website, 30 years ago, before Zovirax was launched and efforts were made to separate the "good herpes" from the "bad herpes", this condition was not even considered and STI (or a DST, a disease, as you say there). Just a medical condition that could be treated and everybody could have.

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Cheri

But I do know what you mean. I recently had confided in a friend that I had genital herpes. A few weeks later she was on her fb page saying she was " as serious as herpes." ALOT of ppl were joking back and forth and I took offense where before I wouldn't have said anything. Sad, isn't it? She immediately removed the comment and apologized but it still ttly sucked.

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