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kace88

Help me!!!!!!!!!!!

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kace88

I think that I have had herpes type 2) 2 yrs now but i don't know until a few weeks ago when my husband of almost 2 yrs showed me that he has bumps on his penis but we hadn't had sex in a month or 2 before he started getting the bumps. so i checked myself and i have them too. Is it possible that I had them for 2 years and he is just now getting it too? and he didn't start getting the bumps til a month or 2 months after we had sex? And NO he has not cheated on me I am 100% sure of that!!!!!!!!! I am scared to tell him that I have the bumps too!!!!!! what should I do is it even possible he got it from me? :(

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nurquelle

Ever thought you could have gotten it from him? Lotts of people carry this virus without even knowing it. I myself had it atleast 7 years before i had an outbreak. I wouldnt worry about who gave it to who, whats important is you both get treatment and learn how to deal with this pesky little thing :)

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kace88

but i am to scared to tell him that i got it what if he leaves me after almost 2yrs of being together?

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nurquelle

I was ( still am ) In a relationship for around 2 years when i found out i had this, i thought he would high tail and run! I was so sure, id resigned myself to being single again. So i called him to tell him what had happened, ( he was serving away in Germany at the time, in the Military), explained everything, and his exact words to me were, " We have a beautiful daughter, a beautiful house, we're getting married soon, why would something like that bother me?"......what im trying to say is, if this guy really does love you, herpes isnt going to change that, i can promise you :)

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kace88

Thank You

I want to say thank you to everyone that has been so nice to me and has helped me out. And I did tell my husband and his response was "well if you did there's nothing we can do about it now." And he still loves me!!!! We are still together and happy!!!!!!!!! :D

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nurquelle

seeeee, you had nothing to worry about :) I was more nervous about telling my partner about my pcos once we decided to try for a baby, than the "i've got herpes" phonecall. So gald you're both very happy, and i wish you many happy years ahead! Nice to see a positive post ^_^

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    • normakiut
      Well, if I were you I would totally tell him. It is important that he knows what he has and gets tested, that way he can be more careful in the future and avoid transmission to other partners. It's true that you can't stay mad at him forever and I thinks it's very mature from you to put the cards on the table, it's the right thing to do.  You don't have to accuse him, you just have to hit him with the facts, I think handing him your test results is a good idea, that way you can see how he reacts, maybe he knew he had it, maybe he didn't. When you dated a few months ago did you guys use protection?  I got it from someone who knew he had it but "thought" nothing would happen to me because he was asymptomatic at that moment.  Best of luck!
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    • WilsoInAus
      No, genital HSV-1 transmission from genital sex to an uninfected person does happen, it is rare in its own degree. It happens to about 1% of couples in the discordant situation described each year. If your partner suggests he didn't know he had genital HSV-1, then I'd suggest he told a porkie pie! This compares to the 0.0001% or lower annual chance of reinfection! So no, there is no need to feel sad at all. You also seem to make out that having HSV-1 is some form of death sentence. It is usually the opposite. The cohort of people with HSV-1 are as healthy if not more so than those without HSV-1 and have similar or less morbidity (aggregate symptoms, pains etc.) than those without HSV-1. There is nothing impaired about a person having genital HSV-1. No shame, concerns, health deficiencies etc.  No fate but what we make! Choose a good fate!
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