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Read lots of similar stories. 54, never had a genital outbreak. Grew up, of course with cold sores on the lip once every year or 2. Never thought a thing about it. Ben married and dated. Never infected a sole. Reunited with a lady I adored during 10 to 16 years ago. Spent 8 hours on the phone nightly for 2 plus weeks. Spent a long weekend in HEAVEN. 2 days later she is in discomfort. a week later to the emergency room. Diagnosis, probable herpes, first time, tested, results today, Positive. She lived with a man 11 years ago for 3 years who had H and never contracted. So, OBVIOUSLY I have it AND HAVE HAD IT, no symptoms, no clue. She has it bad right now, extreme pain. Questions she has: Can she give it back to me if I already had it or have it now? In the absence of a cold sore on the lip, is it likely I gave it to her orally or I could have been one who never showed any genital symptoms and gave it that way? Is it possible to now transmit to her lips or mouth? If I have never had symptoms, will I always be that way? Will her symptoms deminish with time? Can it spread with another outbreak? Where can we find more technical info? We intend to stay together. We have thought about each other for 10 years. Sex is always a risk, even with someone you trust and care about deeply. She has been on Valtrex for 4 days and still hurting really bad, worse today than yesterday. Can routine Valtrex prevent or discourage an outbreak? So many questions and so few answers. I am very concerned about how long it will take her to heal and feel better. No it is simply a waiting game.

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Guest dangermouse


I would be careful before assuming you gave it to her, because if you're actually HSV-, you should try to make sure you stay that way. Don't throw away the condoms just yet, is what I'm saying!

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on another topic a saw the following:

The only truly reliable anitbody blood tests for Herpes simplex anitbodies are the Western Blot and HerpeSelect both are type specific and 100% accurate. In fact, Western Blot method is superior to ELISA..and is even used to confirm ELISA results. Anyway, anitbody titers reach a detectable level for reliable methods... 3-4 MONTHS...NOT WEEKS after exposure. THis process is called seroconversion.

My gf says:

Yeah, I'm familiar with the techniques. My understanding is that if you have circulating antibodies, the tests are 100% accurate. However, I don't think you will neccessarily have circulating antibodies if you have never had an outbreak, but I'm not sure about that. A doctor should be able to tell you, but my doctor wasn't sure the tests would be useful either. I asked her about them last night. Hopefully your doctor will be helpful.

Does anyone have an answer, please? If I have never had an OB will the test work?

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i will take this as good news. gf type test hsv1. doc says longer and tougher primary than hsv 2, but unable to transmit back and minimum if any future ob. obviously oral. and unbelievable it could ever happen.


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    • WilsoInAus
      Hello there @momma267 and welcome. There is no reason to believe that what you have there is other than a pressure sore, something that has emerged from rubbing with clothing or butt cheeks and exacerbated by bacteria or yeast.  Note that the first you’d learn of herpes is unlikely to be on your butt, instead where it enters your body, this is usually within the vaginal lips for females.
    • momma267
      So to begin with, I am 26 and have been with the same partner for 8 years. I have only been with three people ever, one completely protected and the other we were both our firsts. I got this rash on my but while pregnant and my doctor said she was testing for it and I'm so confused. I've had two babies, breastfeed, and never had anything as much as a cold sore. Does this look like something anyone has experienced? I used fragrant soap down there and am hoping it's contact dermatitis or a heat rash from sweating and gaining so much weight.  Advice would be helpful. I'm stressing out a bit as I am pregnant. Blister https://picallow.com/blister/  
    • harrygauff
      @WilsoInAus could you kindly have a look :) also how long does it typically take for herpes blisters to develop into sores
    • harrygauff
      Hi, it is me again, apologies for the recent influx of posts. I've noticed a slightly raised area on the middle of my top lip with what i feel are some bumps. i do have a habit of biting my lips a fair bit and this area is frequented by my teeth. I haven't noticed any unusual/abnormal tingling or burning or pain sensations. the photos are a bit difficult to focus on them but do these seem like the start of cold sores? note: I will be visiting the drs for an std checkup in the coming week. https://imgur.com/gallery/YLVA5us
    • WilsoInAus
      To give everyone confidence that it wasn’t herpes related and conclude as the doctor did that it was a dermatitis issue to refer back to the dermatologist to continue with investigations.
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