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I'm new here, so I guess this is the place to do this.

I have HSV2 and I've had it since I was young, but for the first time in my life I have to share this with someone that I want to marry. I have only had to share this info with one other person and as soon as I told him, he left me. Obviously, he wasn't the right one for me, so I tried not to let it bother me, although I was devestated.

Now I have met the man of my dreams and I have tried to tell him, but we keep getting interrupted and I can't start over again, so I change the subject. I know I am getting an outbreak and I will have to tell him before he sees it and wants to know what's going on. I know how I got HSV2 (drank out of a cup of my brother's when he had an outbreak), but as soon as you say herpes, people freak. I don't want my bf to leave me because he thinks I was cheating on him....since we've been together for the last 5 months and I haven't had one. I have no idea how to approach this topic with him, which sucks because I can talk to him about anything else.

Any advice?

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Well, there's no way to do it but tell him. I know you fear rejection by doing so - rightfully so after the last jerk - but if it's any consolation I was straight forward with my man and yes, it was the hardest thing. But, he did not reject me-which in the long run has made our conversations even better. Once you get past the hurtle of fear and you realize that if you love him you HAVE to tell him and give him the choice you can at least gain some strength even if afraid to talk. I wish you love and happiness and hope that your strength to talk will end with a wonderful strong relationship of trust and understanding! NOT EVERYONE walks away.

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Are you sure you have HSV 2. Have you been tested? If you have oral herpes...it is most likely HSV 1. Type 2 oral is very rare. You said you got it from your brother as a child so you probably have HSV 1. You should go get a blood test to confirm. If you have type 1 you should know that 50-80% of the population has it too. Your bf might even have it and not know. This is info you should share with him when you tell him. Also show him some informative websites. I do have to warn you about oral sex though. You can transmit it to him genitally if you two have oral sex. I stress this so much because that is how I got it. I have HSV 1 genital from oral sex with someone that had HSV 1 oral. Basically...get tested. You can take Valtrex to help reduce your outbreaks & take Lysine...it helps your immune system. Avoid caffeine and foods with arginine (grapes, nuts, cereals) see this website for more: http://www.freewebtown.com/fooddb/nutrdefs/511/2100.html

Hope this info. helps.


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    • Ric12321
      it's actually because of bareback bj...
    • scurrred
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    • CHT
      Hello "FeelingLost".... your fears and concerns are understandable but, nothing you've described regarding the sexual encounter would cause you to contract herpes.... further, your symptoms are not herpes related.  Best of all, your doctor is correct, your results don't show any herpes here.  You can relax.... definitely have your GP take a look at things and see what might be causing the symptoms but, again, none of them are typical herpes related.  I wish you the best in terms of talking to your wife about this encounter.... hopefully she will understand and you both can work through this amicably.  We all make mistakes.... be careful not to beat yourself up too hard over this.... you can become so racked with guilt that you start imagining physical symptoms.  Best of luck.... and take care..... come back to the site if you have questions.
    • FeelingLost75
      Hi (I’m really scared and feel really disappointed in myself and worried about my future), I had oral sex with a condom almost 3 weeks ago and a massage parlor. I also received a hand job at the same time prior to putting a condom on, also may have rubbed my penis on her back a little. Did not touch her genitals I don’t recall any sores on her back. After the event she handed me a pice of TP and after I took off the condom I wiped my penis head to clear away the excess ejaculation…this is where I suspect I got infected, she had just gone pee and wiped and maybe touched a sore or something and then I got it on my penis from the tp? Idk. I’m just flailing.   After this I’ve had discomfort on the skin below the head of my penis and 4 bumps for 2 weeks now, the bumps don’t seem to have changed in size. I also had frequent urination for about a week and have had dull pain in my groin on and off. I also have some pins and needles on the sides of my abdomen/trunk that get worse when I go out in the heat or get dehydrated. I’ve had a lot of trouble sleeping, likely due to guilt and shame and worry about the future.   so I got one test done at 10 days from the event (idk know if this can tell me anything… the doctor assured me it was 100% correct and I don’t have herpes. I was not physically examined). I got a full panel std. neg for everything. HSV-1 results: IgG 0.3 / HSV-2 IgG 0.9 hsv-1 IgM = 2.2 hsv-2 IgM = 3.0 (Reference V. Negative: Less than 9.0 Borderline: 9.0 to 11.0 Positive: Greater than 11.0) I have an appointment with my GP on Thursday, hoping he can help. Will likely go to a std testing service tomorrow to see if I can get in an antiviral proactively. Plan to get tested again this week.    
    • TS4real
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