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greenapple9

Feeling hopeless

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greenapple9

I just found out this past week while my family was in town for my college graduation. It was hard to pretend I was ok. My mom knows and I told my best friend because I couldn't stand having to hold everything in.

I don't know how anyone will want me. The guy I'm dating will probably freak out when I decide to tell him. And I don't know when I should tell him because we aren't even that far in the relationship yet.

I feel "dirty". I don't know how this happened to me. I'm confused and feel hopeless. I don't know what to do now. I just need advice and someone to reassure me that it will be ok. I feel alone even though I know I'm not.

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RealisticGal
I just found out this past week while my family was in town for my college graduation. It was hard to pretend I was ok. My mom knows and I told my best friend because I couldn't stand having to hold everything in.

Awwww...really bummer timing. Sorry it took the focus off what should be a very happy time for you.

I don't know how anyone will want me. The guy I'm dating will probably freak out when I decide to tell him. And I don't know when I should tell him because we aren't even that far in the relationship yet.

My motto is: "The right time to tell is anytime BEFORE intimacy."

You aren't to that point yet. Who knows if you will ever get there? Only time will tell. If it does get to the point when it seems obvious you both want to go there, then you could tell him. If it never gets there, no need.

I feel "dirty". I don't know how this happened to me. I'm confused and feel hopeless. I don't know what to do now. I just need advice and someone to reassure me that it will be ok. I feel alone even though I know I'm not.

This undoubtedly happened to you the same way it happens to many, many other humans. You got a common, minor virus via contact with another human who had it.

But you are not "dirty." You are not "damaged." You have no reason to feel "ashamed." You are not "less" in any way. All that stuff is because of the stupid, false, MANUFACTURED stigma that didn't even exist until a few decades ago.

Herpes simplex is just a virus. It is no different from the flu or chickenpox in that respect. In fact, chickenpox is caused by a virus in the same family as HSV.

Here's a little article you might read. It may help you to see that your feelings right now are normal, but that things will not always feel this way.

I Was Ashamed of My Herpes Until I Found Out...

:wavey:

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