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RockxRoll

I never want to date again!

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RockxRoll

I was diagnosed with Herpes 2 about a year ago. I contracted it from a cheating boyfriend and was completely devastated about the diagnosis. About a month ago I met this wonderful guy, I told him about my diagnosis on our first date, to my surprise he was 100% understanding and said that he saw me the same. A few more dates in, we ended up having sex. He wore a condom and im also on a daily dose of valtrex. To make a long story short, he just called me and said that it burns when he pees and his penis is hurting.....my heart dropped. I cant stop crying. I am almost positive I gave him herpes..and I honestly dont think I can live with myself knowing that I gave someone this awful disease!! I feel so dirty again, I feel so worthless! I feel like I am dying...I mean I did all I could, I told him I had it, we had protected sex AND im on valtrex...yet he still got it! ugh, I just need some support right now because I just feel like utter Sh*t right now...:(

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wastedhousewife

Please do not beat yourself up until he has an actual diagnosis! He may just be a little paranoid. Once herpes is on your mind, I think it is possible to attribute every little odd feeling to the virus, and that is not always correct.

You took every precaution that you could, and you were honest and upfront about the situation. There was nothing better you could have done, and I am proud of you for having such integrity and sense of responsiblity. Please at least give yourself a little credit for that. I hope he does not have herpes, but if he does, I am glad that you will be there to give him information and support!

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Kitty3443

He knew he was taking a risk. He wanted to be with you despite the disease. I hope and don't think he will leave you if you gave him herpes. There were risks and he was willing to take them.

The above person is right too. I hate how we attribute every little odd feeling to the virus.

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RealisticGal

For that matter, even if he does come back with a positive HSV test result, do not beat yourself up. As has been mentioned already, you did your part. You informed him and you took precautions together to lower the chance as much as possible. He made an informed decision to be intimate with you. As an adult, that was his part.

I hope he doesn't have any recriminations.

You definitely do not have any reason for guilt. (Not saying those feelings are not natural. They simply are not justified!)

As far as the bit about thinking every little symptom that pops up can be attributed to herpes, here are a couple of entries from Terri Warren's Intimate Conversations blog that address that from a couple of directions:

Itches, Rashes and Discharge Have More Than One Cause

It’s not always herpes

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RockxRoll

Thank you everyone! :) I feel alot better! Your right, I did all i could and in the end, it was his choice to have intimate relations with me.

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gargamel

In my experience, burning while you urinate is not a symptom of herpes. People usually do no know they have the disease until the actual outbreak. That is why this is passed around so much. I agree, it was consensual and he knew the risks that he was taking. Don't beat yourself up.

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RealisticGal
In my experience, burning while you urinate is not a symptom of herpes.

Burning pain with urination can definitely be a symptom of HSV. Basically, it is due to acidic urine hitting open sores. Some folks describe it as "like peeing red hot razor blades." I believe it affects women that way more than men, due to anatomical differences between the two. But if a man has lesions inside his urethra, it would have the same effect.

:wavey:

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peterrogers8888

I am guy and during my intial outbreak I def. had terrible burning while urinating. But on a side note, I really agree with what everyone else said. You told the guy ahead of time, don't kick yourself to hard.

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