I'm newly diagnosed and very upset

[kaycee]

Hi there. I just found out that I am infected and am trying very hard to cope with this. I have been with my bf for 3 years (I have never cheated on him) and have never had any kind of bumps down there before. My doctor confirmed that I have genital herpes and the first thing that came to my mind is that my bf cheated on me and infected me. I'm very confused about the gestation period of herpes and I know that some people never experience an actual outbreak. I need to know if it's common that a person can have herpes for years and not have the tell-tale cuts/pimples until sometime later, or if I could have recently gotten it and I am having a new infectee outbreak. Any information about this and what has been working for people as far as suppressant therapy and what to do to make the breakout heal much quicker would be so helpful. I'm not taking this too well and dread another outbreak (my doc gave me pills to make the cuts go away for now). Thanks

[WaxedWrong]

yes, u can have it for YEARSSSSSSSSSSSs and never have any signs.

have ur bf tested, he might have it> and never know to.

and i know thats the first thing everybody thinks is that someone cheated> but relax, thinking that will not help w/ ur ob now> stress only makes it worse.

[Young one]

Hey Kaycee,

What was the first outbreak like?Did u get flu like symptoms, swollen lymph nodes, etc?

I think if you got all those along with the first blister, then that would be a true primary outbreak...meaning you were recently infected.

Anyone correct me if im wrong but i think that if you have had it for a long time you would not have those symptoms when you first see it, you will just see it one day and wonder what the hell it is.

When i first saw mine, i had flu symtoms, huge lymph nodes and other symptoms so i believe that due to the above, i was newly infected.

[LittleAngel]

I'm not really sure about that, haven't really heard that. But I did hear that some people don't get a proper primary outbreak just really mild that they can barely tell anythings going on.

I had flu like symptoms. But I just thought it was nothing. I then got this weird pain, like someone had scratched really hard. It was painful to pee. Blisters appeared and I was in basically constant pain. Just the normal really. My lymph nodes weren't huge though!

[Young one]

Yeah well not everyone is gonna get the flu symptoms with the first outbreak or not even at anytime but the ones that do get the flu symptoms, i think its related to the first outbreak because those symptoms (flu,lymphnodes,etc) occur because the body is responding to a totally new organism which it isnt equipt to deal with so it responds in that way. I even got meningitis with my first outbreak and was in the hospital.

I wish i was one of those ppl who never experienced any outbreaks

But i've had 2 since the end of september when i guess i first got it so im still going strong!!

[kaycee]

No symptoms at all I don't think. I thought that I had cut myself shaving down there to be honest. just one little cut showed up, then another on the other side. I only went to my doc because they started to hurt when I went to the bathroom. Lucky for me it was, in my opinion, a very mild outbreak and only uncomfortable for 3 days, until I started meds. That's why it's so confusing. I guess I'm not complaining though. Some people get it very badly with all symptoms. I feel sad that I have it but happy that my outbreak was mild. Hopefully It won't happen too often though.

[Young one]

Hey Kaycee did you ever get your boyfriend tested?

[itsgottogetbetter]

first outbreak

well, I had a primary outbreak in 2003, lots of sores, felt like shit, etc, thats why my Dr. said he was 99.9% sure it was my A-HOLE husband that gave it to me (now my EX,,,,,,there were ALOT of other issues going on). He denied it, and never seemed 'concerned' about getting tested or learning about the virus or protecting himself if truly he didn't HAVE it, so I know in my heart it was him.

If you just had a little 'pimple' or something, you have have had an outbreak before and just didn't realize it. So you may have been harboring it for years, so yea, I agree about not saying someone 'cheated', cause this crap can lie dormant or give little tiny outbreaks that seem like a pimple or ingrown hair. Heck, your BF might have had it for years and also honestly not known.

I can say my EX also might NOT have known he had it, although part of his problem is he was a pathological liar, but still if he was honest, he would have wanted to get tested, etc,,,,,,,,,,,

since the HSV test is never on a normal blood screening, it really makes it SO hard to figure out when and where you got it from. SOMEDAY the medical world will come to their senses and put this on their routine screenings. They are part of the problem of why this is so rampant. Just my humble opinion.

[BoxofRain]

to Kaycee

Hey there, do not feel alone....I felt just like you did when I got diagnosed. I was in your same exact situation...with my boyfriend of 3 years and neither of us had cheated. Turns out he had it and did not ever know it until one random day i contracted it from him and had a horrible first outbreak. He was confused, I was confused....both wanted to think one of us must have cheated until we became fully educated. My blood test came back positive for type2 and it was new antibodies so my doctor explained that though he and I had been sexually active for years, I just happened not to get it from him all those years, but the probability of getting it increases each time you have sex with someone who is infected. We figure it must have been viral shedding because he never had any symptoms before, and that is why he never suspected he would ever have had it. It's still shocking to both of us....as I am sure it is to you because of your similar situation. Hang in there! There will be ups and downs and good days and bad days (in terms of mental and physical aspects). I was diagnosed in August of 05' and still feel like it is so new to me.