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destroyed

No diagnosis, no relief, no hope

17 posts in this topic

I'm new here, so not sure which section to post this in. Sorry to be so blunt. But I need some serious help. I'll try and keep my story as short as possible but there is a lot of it!

About a year ago I had a very brief encounter with a man, I'm talking seconds before it was stopped, but it was skin to skin, bother genital and giving him oral. About 10 days later I got serious internal pain and a swelling feeling. Then lots of thin discharge and extreme vaginal itching. I started to feel unwell and knew straight away I had caught something. I knew 100% it was the start of my first herpes outbreak. I was petrified and couldn't believe I had caught it from that one off very brief encounter! I couldn't get to be seen for many many reasons, so I had to ride it out for 2 weeks while I got seriously worse, including an extremely swollen vagina, itching that literally drove me insane, discharge that was running out and wouldn't stop, cuts down both side of the vagina, serious burning and stinging when having a wee, feeling sick and couldn't eat, feverish, hot flushes and cold chills, in bed for 3 days, and more. Basically I was very very sick.

When I finally could be seen, everything had gone except for a fleshy growth that remained inside the entrance to my vagina. I was concerned it was the start of warts. I was told it was definitely not warts and it was normal skin and that there were no signs at all of herpes so I was fine. I tried to explain what had happened and they said I did have a bit of yeast and slight bv present and probably had a urine infection at the time, but nothing to worry about. All std tests were negative but gave me antibiotics just in case. But about a couple of weeks later, I got sick again and had really bad burning on my bum that I needed to put cold things on to try and stop it and then itchy spots came - it was unbearable. I got cuts again on the folds of the vagina with discharge and itching. The internal pain was unreal, I could hardly walk. I got a VERY VERY sore throat with a huge lymph node. I can't explain how ill I felt. I honestly thought about checking myself into the hospital cause I was convinced I was going to die!

Long story short, I am convinced I got herpes genitally and orally, due to how ill I was and the fact that I get stinging cuts in my vagina and hot burning buttocks that then come up with very itching spots along with really sore lymph nodes in the groin etc etc etc. However, I got blood tested at 4 months and 1 year and have been negative for both type 1 and 2. Problem is, I've been told by doctors that I DO NOT have herpes because I didn't have blisters, and the fact that I get it back to back and it doesn't occur that often. I've been round in circles with this literally every single day for a year. I'm so tired. I took the blood test to prove to them that I do have it, so I can start the treatment. But it came back negative. I honestly believe the result is wrong. I never get fluid filled blisters on my vagina that can be burst and cultured so the odds of ever getting an accurate swab is near zero.

Sorry, I know I'm waffling. My story is so long, so details will just come out as I chat with you guys, but basically, how do I go about actually getting a diagnosis if my blood is negative and I can't get a culture done. I have no access to pcr swabs. Would a biopsy on an itchy bum spot have any help? One doc has visually diagnosed me with herpes and erythema multiforme on my lips (which I thought was the herpes recurring all the time and taking ages to go away) but they want to get a definite diagnosis and typed before starting treatment.

I have lots and lots more questions, but I suppose these will have to do for now. Does anyone else have back to back outbreaks? Do any of you get outbreaks on both sides (cause docs have told me it can ONLY ever appear on one side at a time!) Do you get outbreaks on your bum and vagina at the same time? Do you get outbreaks over a large area on your bum cheek rather than a small tight area? Has anyone else developed lots of polyps due to herpes? Does anyone else have erythema multiforme?

Another major problem is that I am certain I have passed this on to a toddler, who came out with very painful tongue blisters with all the other systemic symptoms. Doctor said it could be herpes but didn't culture cause so many kids get it, it doesn't matter. But a few weeks apart, the toddler came out with painful blisters on both buttocks that burst and scabbed and had systemic symptoms again. I've been told it's impossible to pass this on to children without sexual abuse, but then I've read cases on the net where mothers are convinced their children have caught it. Does anyone have ANY experience with this. I find it hard to live with myself every single minute of every day, because of the pain I'm in, the stigma, the fact I've given it to an innocent child to deal with this crap for the rest of their lives...you get the picture of how much this is affecting me! I will appreciate ANY help at all, I am so depressed and fed up with people telling me constantly that I can't have herpes cause the blood was negative, when I know it can happen. And seriously - all the symptoms scream herpes.... Thanks. (desperately hoping someone will reply to this and start to help me figure this mess out......)

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I'm new here, so not sure which section to post this in. Sorry to be so blunt. But I need some serious help. I'll try and keep my story as short as possible but there is a lot of it!

About a year ago I had a very brief encounter with a man, I'm talking seconds before it was stopped, but it was skin to skin, bother genital and giving him oral. About 10 days later I got serious internal pain and a swelling feeling. Then lots of thin discharge and extreme vaginal itching. I started to feel unwell and knew straight away I had caught something. I knew 100% it was the start of my first herpes outbreak. I was petrified and couldn't believe I had caught it from that one off very brief encounter! I couldn't get to be seen for many many reasons, so I had to ride it out for 2 weeks while I got seriously worse, including an extremely swollen vagina, itching that literally drove me insane, discharge that was running out and wouldn't stop, cuts down both side of the vagina, serious burning and stinging when having a wee, feeling sick and couldn't eat, feverish, hot flushes and cold chills, in bed for 3 days, and more. Basically I was very very sick.

When I finally could be seen, everything had gone except for a fleshy growth that remained inside the entrance to my vagina. I was concerned it was the start of warts. I was told it was definitely not warts and it was normal skin and that there were no signs at all of herpes so I was fine. I tried to explain what had happened and they said I did have a bit of yeast and slight bv present and probably had a urine infection at the time, but nothing to worry about. All std tests were negative but gave me antibiotics just in case. But about a couple of weeks later, I got sick again and had really bad burning on my bum that I needed to put cold things on to try and stop it and then itchy spots came - it was unbearable. I got cuts again on the folds of the vagina with discharge and itching. The internal pain was unreal, I could hardly walk. I got a VERY VERY sore throat with a huge lymph node. I can't explain how ill I felt. I honestly thought about checking myself into the hospital cause I was convinced I was going to die!

Long story short, I am convinced I got herpes genitally and orally, due to how ill I was and the fact that I get stinging cuts in my vagina and hot burning buttocks that then come up with very itching spots along with really sore lymph nodes in the groin etc etc etc. However, I got blood tested at 4 months and 1 year and have been negative for both type 1 and 2. Problem is, I've been told by doctors that I DO NOT have herpes because I didn't have blisters, and the fact that I get it back to back and it doesn't occur that often. I've been round in circles with this literally every single day for a year. I'm so tired. I took the blood test to prove to them that I do have it, so I can start the treatment. But it came back negative. I honestly believe the result is wrong. I never get fluid filled blisters on my vagina that can be burst and cultured so the odds of ever getting an accurate swab is near zero.

Sorry, I know I'm waffling. My story is so long, so details will just come out as I chat with you guys, but basically, how do I go about actually getting a diagnosis if my blood is negative and I can't get a culture done. I have no access to pcr swabs. Would a biopsy on an itchy bum spot have any help? One doc has visually diagnosed me with herpes and erythema multiforme on my lips (which I thought was the herpes recurring all the time and taking ages to go away) but they want to get a definite diagnosis and typed before starting treatment.

I have lots and lots more questions, but I suppose these will have to do for now. Does anyone else have back to back outbreaks? Do any of you get outbreaks on both sides (cause docs have told me it can ONLY ever appear on one side at a time!) Do you get outbreaks on your bum and vagina at the same time? Do you get outbreaks over a large area on your bum cheek rather than a small tight area? Has anyone else developed lots of polyps due to herpes? Does anyone else have erythema multiforme?

Another major problem is that I am certain I have passed this on to a toddler, who came out with very painful tongue blisters with all the other systemic symptoms. Doctor said it could be herpes but didn't culture cause so many kids get it, it doesn't matter. But a few weeks apart, the toddler came out with painful blisters on both buttocks that burst and scabbed and had systemic symptoms again. I've been told it's impossible to pass this on to children without sexual abuse, but then I've read cases on the net where mothers are convinced their children have caught it. Does anyone have ANY experience with this. I find it hard to live with myself every single minute of every day, because of the pain I'm in, the stigma, the fact I've given it to an innocent child to deal with this crap for the rest of their lives...you get the picture of how much this is affecting me! I will appreciate ANY help at all, I am so depressed and fed up with people telling me constantly that I can't have herpes cause the blood was negative, when I know it can happen. And seriously - all the symptoms scream herpes.... Thanks. (desperately hoping someone will reply to this and start to help me figure this mess out......)

I hate to tell you what you don't want to hear, but if you were blood tested for herpes 1 year after exposure with this person and the test was negative for antibodies, you do not have herpes.

Many things can be the cause of your pain. Cuts on your vag area could simply be irritation, again...caused by many things. The worst thing you could do is attempt to diagnose yourself and convince yourself you have something based soley on what you read on the internet. All you'll accomplish by doing that is driving yourself crazy, and that can't possibly be any good for you.

The flu-like symptoms you've experienced could very well have been a flu bug you caught coincidentally. Thinking you could die over this is a bit extreme. Even if you had herpes, it isn't going to kill you.

I have never heard of erythema multiforme. I had to google it. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erythema_multiforme It appears this is a fungal infection of the skin, It also appears to be very common and not always necessarily related to the herpes virus.

I'm curious how you would think you have passed this on to a toddler, especially on this childs bottom, and after you were told by your doctor after a negative blood test that you do not have herpes? Why would you touch a childs bare bottom that wasn't your child to begin with, with either your mouth or genitals (which is the only way it could be passed), PROVIDED you even have herpes?

Even IF you do have herpes, the virus acts differently in everyone. therefore it would be difficult at best for anyone to answer all your many questions about outbreaks.

If you have lesions or blisters, get them swabbed by your OBGYN while they are still fresh and present. I would also inquire exactly what type of blood test was performed on you. If you are told all tests are negative once again...perhaps maybe you should see a dermatologist who specializes in erythema multiforme.

Lastly, and once again....the worst thing you could do is hit the panic button and freak yourself out over this as it's not confirmed you have herpes. Good luck!

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Hi. Thanks for taking the time to reply. I know I posted a lot of info, but let me clarify. I have been told by two dermatologists that I do have herpes but as it was only visual, I want a swab test to confirm it. I have problems getting to a clinic (which is a long distance away) in time to get a swab done. Which is why I insisted on the blood test. However, BOTH derms told me the blood test is often not accurate and actually advised me against it, because they have seen patients who have had positive cultures but negative blood (long after initial infection. And I've read of plenty of people on here with the same situation. And have actually met someone this has happened to. Which is why I am not 100% convinced on the accuracy of these tests, but I wanted to have it anyway in the hope it showed positive so I didn't have to keep chasing swabs at the right time. ) The derm was the one who told me I had EM when I went so show her another oral outbreak. It isn't a fungal infection, it is an allergic reaction to the herpes virus. I didn't think I was actually going to die due to herpes, I know it can't kill you, I meant it as in I felt SOOOO sick that it felt my whole body was screaming out in pain, fever, lymph swelling, ulceration in vagina and mouth, burning skin etc etc. I've actually read of a few cases of mothers who have passes on herpes to their children and have no idea how they have done it. Proven cases. And one in which the child was taken off the mother due to thinking there was sexual abuse, however it was proven not to be the case and put down to accidental through play kissing, passed through diaper changing, or another route such as scratching the buttock lesions before touching the thin delicate skin of a baby. This scares me. I am not being irrational. I have bee suffering for a year and need to move this on. I appreciate any help with any of this. I need some relief now. My body doesn't feel like my own anymore. ;( Thanks again for taking the time to reply. I really really appreciate it.

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Also meant to say, I've had trials of antiviral drugs which helped, but they took me off them so I got symptoms to swab to confirm the type, but like I said, I find it hard to get swabs ;(

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If you can't get the swabs done timely, I would go back on antivirals for relief and test again at a later date. I don't trust the blood tests either though so maybe not the best advice. Did your doctor tell you why he thinks blood tests are inaccurate? I'd be curious to know why some doctors say they are 100% and others say they're rubbish.

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If you can't get the swabs done timely, I would go back on antivirals for relief and test again at a later date. I don't trust the blood tests either though so maybe not the best advice. Did your doctor tell you why he thinks blood tests are inaccurate? I'd be curious to know why some doctors say they are 100% and others say they're rubbish.

It really depends on the type of blood tests that are done as there are several different kinds, some more accurate than not. The Igg and the Western Blot I believe is accurate in testing for antibodies present.

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Hi. Thanks for taking the time to reply. I know I posted a lot of info, but let me clarify. I have been told by two dermatologists that I do have herpes but as it was only visual, I want a swab test to confirm it. I have problems getting to a clinic (which is a long distance away) in time to get a swab done. Which is why I insisted on the blood test. However, BOTH derms told me the blood test is often not accurate and actually advised me against it, because they have seen patients who have had positive cultures but negative blood (long after initial infection. And I've read of plenty of people on here with the same situation. And have actually met someone this has happened to. Which is why I am not 100% convinced on the accuracy of these tests, but I wanted to have it anyway in the hope it showed positive so I didn't have to keep chasing swabs at the right time. ) The derm was the one who told me I had EM when I went so show her another oral outbreak. It isn't a fungal infection, it is an allergic reaction to the herpes virus. I didn't think I was actually going to die due to herpes, I know it can't kill you, I meant it as in I felt SOOOO sick that it felt my whole body was screaming out in pain, fever, lymph swelling, ulceration in vagina and mouth, burning skin etc etc. I've actually read of a few cases of mothers who have passes on herpes to their children and have no idea how they have done it. Proven cases. And one in which the child was taken off the mother due to thinking there was sexual abuse, however it was proven not to be the case and put down to accidental through play kissing, passed through diaper changing, or another route such as scratching the buttock lesions before touching the thin delicate skin of a baby. This scares me. I am not being irrational. I have bee suffering for a year and need to move this on. I appreciate any help with any of this. I need some relief now. My body doesn't feel like my own anymore. ;( Thanks again for taking the time to reply. I really really appreciate it.

One thing I know for a FACT, that is "visual" diagnosis is "rarely" accurate. I think your dermatologist is wrong on this. Blood tests however, ARE highly accurate in detecting antibodies in your blood. I think you should see an OBGYN at this point rather than a dermatologist, and get your blood drawn for a "type-specific" herpes test.

Also...I in no way meant to try and minimize your suffering or judge you in any way as irrational, just wanted you to calm down a bit, as your post reflected how deeply upset you are, and while I fully understand why... and it is totally understandable, it isn't helping you and I wanted to make you feel better.

I seriously doubt given what you've said that you infected this child with herpes. Get that worry out of your head. If you changed a babies diaper, the virus doesn't reside on your hands so no worries! Since you have not had it confirmed by a swab that you have oral herpes, I wouldn't not automatically assume you gave this child oral herpes through kisses.

Lastly...I am really sorry you've been suffering like this. The "not knowing" I think is worse than knowing. Try and do your best to schedule an appt. with your OBGYN or even your family general practictioner and get at least a blood test done. When you're there you can discuss how you can go about getting fresh lesions swabbed if it happens.

(((HUGS)))

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THANK YOU! I have seen a gyn as well as two derms. All said the blood test (and I had the herpeselect IGG) doesn't always pick up antibodies in some people. One derm said she has actually stopped using the blood tests altogether now because she has seen so many of her patients test positive in a swab and negative in the blood, even with plenty of time passed, so said she doesn't want to give patients false diagnosis or hope, knowing that she's seen it so often. However, I insisted that I have it in the hope it was positive and stop the chase, but it was negative ;( And yes, you are totally right. I'm at the bottom of the pit and the stress or not knowing is horrible, cause somedays I get a tiny bit of hope that maybe it isn't herpes and when they find out what infection I caught they can fix it and I'll get back to normal. But I know that isn't really going to happen. I think all I can do is go back on antivirals to get a bit of relief and accept I'll not find out the type any time soon or just keep on suffering while trying to catch the virus with a swab. Would love to talk to one of the many people on here who have had a false negative blood test. This whole thing is the pits!!! Thanks again everyone. Really appreciate the support right now.

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Is there any way you can find out if the partner is +?

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THANK YOU! I have seen a gyn as well as two derms. All said the blood test (and I had the herpeselect IGG) doesn't always pick up antibodies in some people. One derm said she has actually stopped using the blood tests altogether now because she has seen so many of her patients test positive in a swab and negative in the blood, even with plenty of time passed, so said she doesn't want to give patients false diagnosis or hope, knowing that she's seen it so often. However, I insisted that I have it in the hope it was positive and stop the chase, but it was negative ;( And yes, you are totally right. I'm at the bottom of the pit and the stress or not knowing is horrible, cause somedays I get a tiny bit of hope that maybe it isn't herpes and when they find out what infection I caught they can fix it and I'll get back to normal. But I know that isn't really going to happen. I think all I can do is go back on antivirals to get a bit of relief and accept I'll not find out the type any time soon or just keep on suffering while trying to catch the virus with a swab. Would love to talk to one of the many people on here who have had a false negative blood test. This whole thing is the pits!!! Thanks again everyone. Really appreciate the support right now.

So you've tested negative for both hsv1 and hsv2? There are some people that have t-cell immunity and do not show antibody levels on the igg testing. The only thing you can hope for is if you should have another o/b, that you can get to the doctors to get it cultured as soon as possible. I don't have complete faith in the igg testing.

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So if a person tests positive for type 1 but negative for type 2 after plenty of time, 10 months, they should be able to produce antibodies correct? Igg testing just doesn't seem reliable.

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That's what I was going to say... Are they testing you for hsv1 & 2 separately. There are private std testing centers that do!

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Keep your chin up. You WILL get this figured out. In the meantime, please remember that stress makes OBs worse. So you must remain calm and see it as a mystery to be solved. Easier said than done, but stress absolutely breaks me out. Also, for someone to wonder how you could have given it to your toddler obviously doesn't have a toddler. I kissed my babies feet, bellies, and yes those cute little fat bum. Not in a gross sexual way, but in a loving playful way. You will definitely make it through this, but you must keep your chin up to help improve your health.

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I'm not a herpes expert... don't even know yet whether I have it. BUT, since it would be "atypical" if I do have herpes i've been tearing the internets medical sites/boards apart looking for what else it could possible be (you know, to stave off some of the utter terror of waiting 3 weeks for a swab result). Based on everything i've looked up i'd say that you either have a serious fungal issue or more likely you have a bacterial STD such as gonorrhea or chlamydia... especially considering the discharge you speak of. Also, if it is FUNGAL then you could pass it to someone else (like the toddler) FAR easier than you could pass herpes to them. For instance, passing herpes via a wet towel is astronomically unlikely... but passing a fungal infection via a wet towel isn't uncommon at all. I can't say that you don't have herpes, but all of the evidence screams that you don't... you've had multiple blood tests come back negative already, your symptoms fit other conditions, and as far as the youngster is concerned... it's REALLY unlikely that you could've passed him H, but quite likely for you to have passed along something fungal via an object. It could even be a simple candidiadis overgrowth... a yeast infection that went systemic.

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Thank you so much everyone for contributing. I am absolutely positive I have herpes. I was extremely extremely sick with my first outbreak and could hardly walk with the pain in my vagina. I don't have any other infection, I have been swabbed for them. If it was gonorrhea or something it would be there all the time and be picked up with one of the multiple swabs I've had. However herpes is only picked up if a swab is done on fresh blister fluid, which is the problem. Does anyone know if a biopsy would detect herpes if it was done on a bump on my butt? cause the blisters i get are more like bug bites so can't really get blister fluid to swab easily. As for the toddler, I unfortunately am also convinced I have passed on herpes. I was constantly scratching my spots at my sacral area and feeling my bottom lip that had raw peeling skin on it, so I could have easily passed this on my changing diapers or putting my finger in their mouth/sharing a spoon, doing playful kisses and raspberries. A babies skin is so thin, it can be easier caught that adults do. I wish I had have known that at the time and been more careful. I am totally struggling every day to cope with a young child having to grow up with this incurable std that will cause pain, relationship problems and a lifetime of stigma and probable bullying at school, through no fault of their own. It was my stupid actions that have made them suffer their whole entire life. How could i have done this?

Yeast wouldn't be causing burning and stinging skin that then itches before 'obvious' herpes lessions appear. Plus the groin nodes swell, hot flushes happen and a general feeling of pressure and swelling happens. I was perfectly healthy before the encounter with this guy. 10 days later all hell broke lose and i haven't been the same since. I have herpes, i just have to prove it. I don't have confidence in the igg tests. I have read SO many stories of false negatives (positive swabs for herpes but years later the igg is negative). Afterall the igm was once the test of choice so who knows what test will replace the igg in the future.

Does anyone else get back to back outbreaks, and outbreaks that are bilateral on the buttocks or get it on the buttocks and vagina at the same time? Would love to chat to someone in my position. Thanks again everyone. Chatting with you is actually helping cause I'm going mad here. Nice to be able to offload to kind understanding people. ;)

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Destroyed sorry for what you're going through. I think I had back to back outbreaks in the beginning with my H and I have HSV 1 vaginally. Seem to be just in the vaginal area. After a year or so I went on Valtrex and it's helped so much. I had burning around my entire lips and cheeks and eyes for awhile too. I thought I had herpes on my face. Later, I was diagnosed with Rosacea and they gave me cream for that. The cream seemed to work. I never had any blisters on the lip area and therefore couldn't be diagnosed for HSV. I got burning and itching only around the lips. I started Valtrex and Noritate cream the same month.

I thought for awhile that it could be yeast and tried "yeast pills" from the health store but I'm not sure. It didn't seem to work. Sometimes I think I should try a yeast free diet but haven't gotten around to it-which I think is just a sugar free diet.

I went to a Psychiatrist last year for the first time and then went to a counsellor. I'm back with a counsellor again. I've just been through so much in this life and need to talk. My sister has Vulvodynia, maybe you should look this up also. Just incase. I would advise you to keep taking the Anti-Virals and see if that helps.

Just understand your frustration and fear and hope things workout. I would try counselling and try to do things that can de-stress your life as much as possible. Just worried about your stress level too. I understand your frustration and fear.

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Hey Destroyed.

I'm sorry to hear what is happening to you too.

I'm also trying to determine if I have Herpes and like you I feel pretty sure I do. I don't get any rash or blister symptoms but have had on and off (daily) itching and burning for about 8 months straight. Plus swollen lymph nodes in my groin and some urethra pain. I hate that the doctors keep trying to convince me it can't be Herpes because the blood tests are negative (last one at 6 months for me). You do not have to look too far to find people who have taken a year to seroconvert.

I have had my urethra "scoped", ouch, and everything looked normal. 4 blood tests for me. My doctor had me get a biopsy done on the lymph node and everything was normal (oh yeah, that cost a pretty penny). Speaking of costs, I have pretty good insurance but still, my out pocket so far is nearing $2000. Insult to injury.

I'm hopeful that your symptoms improve as time passes as we read is typically the case.

Good luck. Warner

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      I have been single for almost a year and I feel prepared to possibly give dating a shot again. In preparation for this and knowing often the asymptomatic shedding occurs, I made an appointment with my doctor to get a prescription for an anti-viral.

      I was a bit surprised to have my doctor tell me that he was basically just going to prescribe the medication for outbreak management. I have only had two outbreaks in the last three years (from what I know now I was misdiagnosed years ago when I had an initial outbreak and by a dermatologist of all people!) and he used having 6 outbreaks a year as a baseline of whether or not I would need daily suppressive therapy. I pressed him on this further with my concern of transmission to another person as my outbreaks are few and far between and are very mild (at least I can be thankful for that). I was told that as long as I'm using condoms and abstaining when I have outbreaks that I wont transmit it.

      I didn't feel like arguing with him and I sort of don't feel like I should argue with an experienced medical professional, but I thought this was how the medical community used to handle this (maybe around the 80's and 90's) until they better understood how often shedding occurred. From just about everything I've read that just doesn't seem true and condoms only protect the area they cover leaving everything else vulnerable to transmission. I know even with condoms and medication it is still possible, but the risk is greatly reduced. Does the advice I was given seem out of touch?

      The only other conclusion I can try to grasp is that because I have such infrequent outbreaks I don't shed as much or there is less of a risk? I have yet to read anything that would back that up.

      If it does seem off I don't feel like I can tell my doctor to prescribe me more for daily suppressant or that I disagree with his medical advice. Do I go to different doctor and try to explain this or a family planning center? It's such a pain to establish with another doctor and I feel like a dick telling him I think he's not giving me the best info.

      I was really hoping to feel less burdened by this disease today, but this took the wind out of my sails. I just don't feel that I would be giving a potential future partner the best scenario to prevent infection and makes me feel less confident in putting myself back out there.

      Do you think going to a family planning center would be better or they would understand where I'm coming from and suggest daily therapy? It seems like they deal with sti's more directly and could be more knowledgeable.
    • Honeybee_
      Today I was diagnosed with HSV-1.  About a week ago I was with my partner, well ex partern now. And he gave me oral sex, after I noticed he had a cold sore that looked like it was healing so I didn't question it. Well Thursday I had and gyn app and thought if it was anything the Pap smear would pick it up or even the doctor would. Well when I got home I googled herpes, I know the worst thing ever to do it Google. Well it told me a Pap smear could not test for it that I had to get a swab, that Friday I started to noticed a ulcer like sore and immediately got freaked out. Monday morning I went to the doctor, explained to him and at first we thought I had cut myself with a razor or something because it was on my labia. Of course we were both wrong because I do have it. Tonight I told my ex partner that I was diagnosed with it he simply didn't care and then about 15 minutes later he tells me he couldn't do it anymore and that he was in love with another girl..... How am I supposed to cope with this? I know living with it isn't the end of the world but why does it feel like it? 
    • WilsoInAus
      This confirms that you have HSV-1, it will not be wrong. The only question is location. Unless you have a swab from your genital area, then this is almost certainly an oral infection. The number is not high, it is perfectly normal. It shows that your blood at the time of sample had a healthy level of antibodies. All this suggests you have had oral HSV-1 since before living memory. 70% of the population have oral HSV-1. As you've never had a known outbreak, chances are you will have a very low outbreak frequency in the future. This is all nothing to be concerned about at all. It is just a virus that has clearly not caused a single issue for you and this is likely to continue.
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